u/mopeyscubaboy

What the title says.

I was re-dx'd ADHD in 2017 (dx'd but not treated as a child). After 4 years of paying obscene amounts to a psychiatrist, my PCP took over prescribing my stimulants (same drug, same dose the whole time, 2017-2026). PCP retired recently: "Just find a psychiatrist to continue to prescribe." I only saw this PCP grudgingly for my ADHD meds: If my medication hadn't been life-changing, I'd happily have not seen anyone at all.

Area psychiatrists aren't taking new patients, aren't on my insurance, area PCPs now refuse to prescribe scheduled psych drugs. I cannot afford the time or thousands out of pocket for new tests and doctor roulette while I lose my job and relationships due to untreated ADHD, you know the drill.

I just want to continue my treatment, damn it. This whole thing is enraging. I have letters from docs, bottles, records from the pharmacy, blah blah blah. Please help. TIA.

My partner and I are lucky enough to be able to travel a few times a year to luxury resorts in the tropics. We love warm water and anything on, under, or above the waves--surfing, scuba, snorkeling, wakeboarding, SUP, and just hanging out together in the sea/ocean and talking. Our travels are our splurges, we work hard to save up to go on these trips, and we pay a pretty penny (and tip well too) for the experience.

Other than the nightmare brat-infused flights (and missing our Bengal, Siameses and Brittany Spaniel!) the only thorn in our vacations have cropped up more increasingly in the last few years. It's caused by a combination of so-called "gentle parenting", resorts that now fear pissing off the parents more than anything else, and misbehaving hordes of Bratley/Sniffanys resulting in an environment that is more irritation than relaxation. A few examples: screeching kids at 5 am running races outside our room, surly screen-fried SullenTeens blaring their inane "music" at top volume at the Quiet Over 21 pool, mean-mugging and yelling nasty shit at guests and staff, and the time a babbling "toddler" (I hate that word) with snot running down its nose tried to crawl under our table during a romantic dinner while the parents, of course, looked down their nose at us for not finding it "precocious and adorable."

Let me stress that these examples were at high-end resorts that do not tout themselves as "family friendly" and do emphasize a quiet, relaxing atmosphere. Some might say "so go to an adults only resort". Well, first of all, I don't like to normalize the idea that the vacation world belongs to "families" = juveniles behaving poorly so that Mom'n'Dad can inflict their poor choices on the rest of those unfortunate enough to share a hotel with them, with the rest of us having to limit our vacation choices. Secondly, in my traveling experience, "adult only" does not simply mean "no one under 21". It tends to be a euphemism for an obnoxious, loud, sexed-up and frankly overpriced and less luxurious atmosphere where Bratley and Sniffany's parents are, for a week or so, free to behave like their teenage progeny. No thanks.

This is why I was thrilled to learn during check-in (while requesting a "quiet area") that one of our favorite resorts now has an informal, but enforced, "adult only section". This included a series of bungalows/villas, pool, hot tub, and a poolside bar/restaurant. Another more formal restaurant wasn't enforced as adult only, but because it was located at the very end of the resort that was, we didn't see a single one the whole time we were there. We ate at this place almost every night! During our trip, we met quite a few CF couples as happy as we were with this development, and also made a few friends who shared our (on the extreme end, TBH) CF opinions.

Also, we were just finalizing our plans for our autumn trip when I read that the resort--in a totally different country, and a different resort brand--now has the same set-up, an adults-only 'mini resort' section of villas/beach club/pool/restaurant. Yes!

Now, if only an airline would do the same thing with some of its flights, starting with the red-eye ones...but I'm not holding my breath.

Still--next time your vacation is marred by the little shits, if you loved the resort besides, maybe mention "the new travel trend" (hate the "t" word, but it serves its purpose here) in an email to management.

Hello chubby travelers!

Thanks for the Mandarina villa recs and opinions on the One and Onlys (our decision is getting harder, though, as Rosewood Mayakoba and Belmond Maroma have entered the chat). I hope my new question is within bounds--the destination is not exotic, but my goal is still to find the best chubby resort there.

Our Mexico trip will be attached to a Sarasota, FL family reunion/40th birthday party for my brother-in-law. I've never been to the Gulf side of Florida, and the pickings look fairly limited for chubby resorts in the area. I found a St. Regis on Longboat Key and a Ritz in Sarasota proper. We usually like to use points for non-vacation trips, unless there is an amazing non-Bonvoy/Hilton/Hyatt resort that would be worth it. However, the only other resort that kept coming up was The Longboat Key Club, about which I know nothing.

Am I missing other possibilities? Has anyone stayed at any of these properties? My brother-in-law is no help, as this is far from his area of interest. He also wants us to stay at his house to help with his kids, and we'll pass, lol.

We're a fortysomething couple, no kids, who love any and all ocean activities (air and land adventures too). Our taste is for beautiful and sprawling, multiple pool-laden, outdoor-oriented tropical resorts with a luxurious but non-ostentatious, quiet yet genial vibe. We're more likely to be bothered by a glut of screeching kids/teens or obnoxious "influencer"-type antics than birds eating our breakfast or a gecko in our bed (we actually were charmed when these happened).

Thanks again!

Hello fellow chubby travelers, I'm hoping for some advice!

My spouse is originally from Miami and I'm from the Bay Area. We have lived in SoCal for the past decade. Whenever we visit our families on each coast, we always attach some time away for us. We've kind of fallen into a routine of going to the same places for the past several years--splitting time between Rosewood Kona Village and FS Hualalai or else going to FS Lana'i (Manele) for the SF trips, with Ritz-Carlton Dorado Beach Reserve as our "go to" in PR in conjunction with a Miami visit. We've always preferred Hawaii, either Big Island or Lana'i, to PR for everything except water temperature!

How do the "One and Onlys" (Palmilla and Mandarina) compare to our favorite HI resorts? We're thinking of stopping in Mexico for several nights on the way to Miami and/or on the way back instead of repeating a PR trip again. We're also curious about which One and Only--or what other comparable resort in Los Cabos or Nayarit--would be most preferable for our needs and our autumn travel time (providing Mandarina/anything near PV isn't still impacted by the recent issues).

We are a no kids, late 30s/early 40s couple who love the ocean and all adventures from e-foiling to paragliding as well as SUP, surfing, horseback riding, fishing, and SCUBA. We desire quiet yet friendly luxury. We'd love a spread-out, tranquil resort with a variety of pool experiences (hopefully at least one pool will be heated beyond ocean temperatures!), accommodations that offer plunge pools in a one-bedroom villa or guestroom (as opposed to only in a resort's most spacious, multiple-bedroom category), and a friendly and professional yet relaxed staff. Another plus would be a choice of on-site restaurants and bars throughout the evening and night.

We'd like to avoid massive amounts of screaming kids or rude packs of "music"-blaring teenagers. We're also not fans (major understatement) of snotty, wealth-on-display party-oriented "influencer"/"celebrity" vibes--(cough 1Hotel Hanalei Bay, FS Maui cough). How would One and Only Palmilla and/or Mandarina measure up? Would one be more ideal than the other for our needs? If not, would we be missing out if we don't visit one location to our Miami visit and the other on our way back to SoCal? Any other resorts in either area that might fit our needs better than either O&O? Any reason that one location might be way better than the other for us?

Given that we would be taking this trip in the fall, is there a difference in water temperature between Palmilla and Mandarina? How does each stack up to Hawaii?

Thanks and happy traveling!