u/mothinwall

My husband and I are being blessed with a fourth little one! We are so fortunate. But we are having horrible trouble with names.

The two of us love to have a little drink at the end of the day to cool off from work, and we want our angels to be our respites from this world, too. (Try being a mom of three boys - L O L!) So, we named our sweethearts Tito, Jack, and Daniel (J&D are twins).

My husband thought Mary or Jane would be sweet but I don’t want to be inspired by the devil’s lettuce. I thought Bailey would be adorable, but he reminded me that anything Irish goes against our Protestant values. Morgan was briefly on the table, but I don’t want our little girl to be a captain — women aren’t meant to be leaders.

Any thoughts? God bless you all 🇺🇸🙏

Confession:
These pics are the best and the worst of my curls. I am so new to this journey. Please be kind. I know I’ve committed product sins. I’ve been cheap, and not taken the products that do seem to work on vacation with me. But the problems aren’t just in pics 3&4! And I am finally FULLY committed to finding a routine that is actually going to work for me.

Problems:

FRIZZ & DRYNESS. I feel like my hair is constantly thirsty. The top layer dries out within 5 minutes when air drying, and even with curly-friendly products (I think?) my frizz can be insane. It’s pretty okay in pic 1, but note the frizzy (and flat) roots and overnight change.
SLEEPING. I am constantly sleepy and can only do my hair at night. Bonnets and scarves slip off, pineapples don’t seem to work, and I toss & turn.
FIDGETING. If I can’t run my hands through my hair I am very sad.

“Routines”:
Pic 1: Mielle rosemary mint shampoo, then Walgreens collagen conditioner (I’m so sorry) scrunched in the shower. Once out, scrunched with towel, added Trader Joe’s leave-in conditioner and scrunched in a good portion of Not Your Mother’s Curl Talk Cream. Diffused to 80% and air dried.

Pic 2: the pic 1 routine followed by sleeping on a (fake?) silk pillowcase.

If I diffuse, I wash every two days. If I air dry and don’t use curl talk, every one day, as my hair gets greasy fast.

Pics 3&4: vacation rental rose shampoo, Pantene keratin conditioner. Wide tooth comb while wet, add Trader Joe’s leave-in conditioner, air dry. This is NOT my normal routine but it’s where I’m at right now and I feel like my hair is dying.

I also clarify once every 2 weeks (I forgot the brand) and use Eva.nyc hair mask once a week when I’m at home (pics 1&2).

No refresh routine (I genuinely can’t figure it out).

Extra info:
Virgin hair.
Very fine hair, but I have a lot of it.
Low porosity.
I don’t have split ends as far as I can tell. I’ve looked in different sections of my hair and haven’t found any.

Questions:
If you could overhaul my usual routine, what would you do? I can actually afford good products as of late but I prefer not to go crazy. I prefer not to do salon treatments but I am okay with it if needed.

What do you use as an emergency life-saving product when your hair is so dry and sad it feels like it’s in pain?

Thank you so much for anything you can help with at all. I hope this was formatted okay and I’m happy to clarify and/or provide more info.

Trying to find a value-oriented girls name, please HELP!

My hair is so dry and frizzy