u/motnur

Hey, do you guys have a bakery you would recommend? I did Google some places, but would greatly appreciate some feedback!

My birthday is on Wednesday and I am aware it is awfully last minute, but I decided today that I would like to get myself a small cake or cupcake for my birthday. I don't really have family in the area and since it is a Wednesday, my friends are busy. I know that I could hit up the Meijer or something, but I thought it might be nice to treat myself.

Thanks in advance!

Hey guys, not sure if this is the right board, but I genuinely feel like I am going crazy.

Yesterday, I had a short screening call with someone in regards to a job I had applied for. The screening went alright and they asked if I would be interested in coming in for an in-person interview. I agreed and they sent me an email with the details. I didn't look it over with a fine tooth comb yesterday because I was busy, but I did notice that they referred to it as a meet and greet in their email.

Today, I have been bombarded with more than five emails and text messages asking me to complete pre-employment screening and submitting my personal information. I did check to see if the links were legitimate and I did research the company, so I know those are both real. I have not been given an offer of employment, I have not agreed to anything other than I guess a meet and greet. When I emailed questions to the HR email I received today, they were kinda abrupt in their response and did not answer any of my questions. I did try to call a number listed in the text they sent, but no one ever answered it.

I guess what I am looking for is feedback on if anyone else thinks all of this is profoundly strange or not.

I don't really know where to start or what to say, but I am feeling frustrated and angry. I am sorry if this is a disjointed mess.

A little context, but my father passed away in 2024 from a heart attack after dealing with dementia for roughly ten years. My parents divorced in 1998 and my mother remarried in 2001. My mother is one of seven children and I am one of 20 grandchildren.

My step dad passed away NYE 2025 after being my mother's primary caregiver for a long time. And that is the problem. He was abusive. He isolated my mother from her children, from her siblings, from friends. He made her deeply paranoid about doctors to the point where she gets aggressive if they're mentioned more than once. Since he passed, the family has moved her across state to live closer to two of her brothers as well as myself. The two brothers are not active in helping with her, but another brother who lives out of state is. My mother has always been developmentally delayed. Even at her "best", she had a fifth grade reading level. She has always had a difficult time understanding interpersonal relationships and boundaries. She does not understand why some of her siblings have been hesitant to speak with her since they were allowed to be in contact with her once again. I was largely raised by my older brother because she had no interest in having me and I was able to obtain emancipation in 2006.

Since she moved in January, it has been extraordinarily difficult. We discovered a lot of financial abuse as well and my brother, who is my mother's financial POA, has been pulling his hair out trying to untangle everything. My brother lives on the other side of the state and is the only one who my mother isn't outright aggressive with. She calls him 18+ times a day (on good days) and he is facing health difficulties as a result of the stress. My sister lives several states away.

Although I live the physically closest to her, I have been genuinely struggling to be around her. I struggle a lot with the abuse that I endured for my entire life. I have never had a good relationship with her. Logically, I know that is my own issue to deal with and that I cannot set myself on fire, but it is very difficult with trying to balance being responsible to my own mental health and being present and helpful with my family.

My family used to call me multiple times a day to scold me that I wasn't doing enough to help care for my mother since January. It got to the point where I told them I don't want anything to do with caring for her and that it was making me actively suicidal. Since then, they have adjusted their behavior and I appreciate that, but it is to the point where they refuse to tell me what is going on with my mother. I know that is an odd thing to say, but I don't know. I don't even know how to put it into words.

I don't know what is going on with her health, I don't know what is going on with her cognitively. I just get random phone calls from her where she is absolutely delirious and panicking. I feel guilty that I am not doing more for someone that I should love. Her living with me is not something I am willing to even entertain, I have been no-contact with her at multiple points in my life. Even before she started to decline, she would tell me how she wished I had been the one to kill myself after a family member died by suicide in 2008. Unfortunately, that is one of the more mild things she has said or done to me.

I guess what I am trying to understand and accept is, am I doing what is right by taking a step back? Am I just running away? I feel like I am failing my family and making things unintentionally more difficult on my siblings. I have admittedly always had a hard time feeling connected to my family because my mother would tell me that they "disowned" me because of how mean I was to her, even when I was a little kid. I am afraid that they really will disown me if I am not more present for my mother.

I don't know. I don't know how to be involved safely. I don't know how to support my siblings. My brother asked me to tour some memory care facilities with him tomorrow without our mother present and I think I would like to do that.