u/musicsegue618

I’m REALLY lucky I don’t have somewhere to be really early, and I’m a late night owl myself. But this is ridiculous.

You guys are gonna blow off your arm or something.

Yeah... I know this is a weird post.

I like the studio I teach at a lot, and the pay is actually good compared to what studios usually charge. But there used to be a problem where the studio would have me come in several days... and sometimes it would end up one of those days it would only be 2 students, another day maybe 3 or 4, and then a couple more filled days as it should be. Though frankly, I think even on my busiest days (4 hours) I could still teach more (at a studio I used to teach in NJ I sometimes taught for 6 hours from 3-9pm). It seems that rather than booking teachers later, they just hire more and more teachers to teach primarily a window of 3-5:30pm.

I asked, because I was commuting far for the time (and still am until I move next month), that I needed a minimum of 2 hours teaching, and really three to make it worth it, but would prefer more than that (ideally 4 or more). And the studio was and is respectful about it; I go in a few days a week, and even if one of the days might be lighter, I'm teaching at least 2.5 hours, and heavier days of 4 hours.

Meanwhile, I've needed unfortunately some support from my parents when I needed to cut back on some other work (I was doing dance accompanying, music directing youth theatre, subbing at a church some Sundays, other freelance gigs), to the point when I was doing other things I was so burnt out and exhausted that at one point I briefly blacked out while driving over a bridge, and started having nightly hot flashes.

I'm finally moving closer to where the studio is, but my mother is getting so trigger happy about it saying "It's much less a big deal to have only one or two lessons on a given day since you live in the area" (and thus do more days and spread myself thin over them). And I'm explaining to her that it's much more than the commute but the fact that you're now blocking out that day where you really can't do anything else, and also giving the impression that it's 'ok' to the studio to let them do this ("Oh, well a student could've come Wednesday, but since now she can teach any day and it doesn't matter, why not Thursday... or Saturday?")

I've already mentioned to her in the past when I would, when I used to music direct a theatre group, be asked to come in to teach the music to kids for two hours, that it really entailed 2 hours prep the day before (listen to the songs, figure out how to split the harmony parts, pre-diagnose trouble spots), plus an hour (or more) commuting each way... to teach (and thus get paid for only) two hours, and thus it works out to about $18/hour (I would get paid $100 for two hours)... and I live in NYC currently. But she doesn't see it that way. She sees it as "It's a little more money that you have." And saw that with everything... dance accompanying ($40 an hour but only there for 2.5 hours plus an hour commute each way)... that musical theatre directing... going into Manhattan (when I one point did door-to-door on my own) one day for one student and $90 (45 minute lesson) and another day for two students for $120 (two half hour lessons). "It's not a big deal, you wouldn't be working anyways".

Should I eat it? Allow myself to go in and teach only one or two students more days a week without any promise of more students those days (because when that originally happened, nothing changed until I asked to consolidate my schedule)?

My roommate and I live in an apartment where we each have a cat. I moved in after my roommate (we have separate leases), and he already had a litter box in the entrance area for his cat. I figured when I got my own cat after moving in, despite the offer that our cats could share the box, I would get my own litter box for my cat despite it having to be in my room so I could keep the door closed at night for both privacy and reduce noise, but during the daytimes we have both left our doors open so the cats are free to roam around and play with each other.

Over the past 3 years, his cat would keep eating my cat’s food every opportunity he got (my cat is more of a grazer), which I would keep shooing him away from, and use my cat’s litter box all the time. That’s because it really seems my roommate only scoops his cat’s box maybe once a week if even that- there are many noticeable turds showing almost every time I pass it by, and it often smells. He’s also complained about it having to so often sweep the floor there to keep the litter from getting into his room. I scoop my cat’s every other day or often a little more if it’s really building up (yeah I could do better, but it’s certainly better than him), and every single time I clean the box his cat takes a shit in it within 5 minutes. I would constantly be buying more litter because I would go through so much from both cats. I groaned about this, and brought this up several times with my roommate (“You know, your cat keeps eating my cat’s food. Maybe there’s a better food your cat likes?” Or “He keeps using my cat’s litter box. I scoop mine every other day”), but try not to harp on him.

A couple weeks ago I sadly had to bring my cat to the emergency vet twice for bladder stones (he’s ok and thankfully, despite that my cat was showing symptoms and x-ray confirmed two stones, he’s not showing symptoms anymore and is back to his usual self.) He’s now on a prescription diet and I’m closely monitoring his litter box, and I told my roommate I have to now keep my door closed unless I can supervise (to shoo his cat out when he inevitably goes for my cat’s food or litter box).

What do I notice?

My cat actually likes the prescription food (!) and seems to be eating more. I’m going through less litter (he is using it and showing signs his bladder is fine, but it’s no longer the “business” of two cats every time I scoop).

Meanwhile, even as I write this, my roommate’s cat is crying out my door to come in so he can try to eat my cat’s food and use his box (he already tried to twice, and I had to pull him out before I just closed my door and banned him.) His litter box is an absolute mess- it’s half turds and half litter. I’ve again mentioned a couple days ago “You know, I scoop mine every other day, and it also seems to keep kicked litter down.”

I feel bad for my roommate’s cat. But at least I’m not burning through litter and food anymore.