Did I go too far?
My (21f) partner (22m) and I have been together for about a year. I loooove sex but he’s pretty low libido. We go through periods where we only have sex every 6 weeks to sometimes getting down and dirty 3x per week. I’m definitely more on the kinky/wild side and he is very reserved sexually.
Last night while I was a lil high on an edible, my boyfriend and I had sex after a bit of a weird conversation (mostly pertaining to how we didn’t know that either one of us had wanted sex that night since we just spent the last hour goofing around). Weird convo led to sort of weird sex.
It all culminated with him finishing himself off while I masturbated next to him and ending up offering for him to “cum on me”. The way he was positioned sort of made it so that I couldn’t get my boobs at the right angle so I instead had him cum in my mouth. I then sat up on my knees, spat the semen onto my breasts and let it then dribble down to my vagina. I flipped onto my back and went spread eagle so he could see me masturbate and finish myself off one last time using his cum as lube (it sorta went everywhere). I’m typically trying to be more vanilla with my actions around him because I don’t wanna freak him out! He seemed a bit gobsmacked and didn’t really know what to do so I started getting changed while apologising. I think being not-so-sober made me feel more empowered to do what felt good for me but also made it so that I did something my partner might’ve been a bit grossed out by. He reassured me it was okay and hot but it didn’t really seem sincere and then left.
I’ve tried so many times to suggest things we could try but he seems happy just doing what we do now. Sometimes we do try something slightly more risqué like me getting spanked while laying on his lap and he likes that. I think if he was more vocal and clear about what he did and did not like it would be easier for me to not get so confused about letting my guard down. I guess I just feel like I did something wrong last night even though I don’t think it should be a big deal. Bro doesn’t kiss me even if I’ve already swallowed the cum 😩
We are still young and I’m the only person he’s slept with so I guess I’m sort of wanting some feedback on if men would be weirded out by what I did or if they came out of their shell sexually the longer they were with someone kinkier than them. Thanks!!
Edit: I think I flaired this wrong mb fam