r/sex

Very typical story of our sex life used to be passionate and full of naughtiness, but that waned after we got married after 6 years of being together. she used to send me nudes, random dirty texts, ideas of what she wants to try in the bedroom next time we are together.

Now? Sex is never mentioned outside of the bedroom. when we do have sex, she doesn't want to do anything remotely exciting non-routine she won't let me go down on her, she does not want to go down on me in spite of that being one of her favorite things to do by her own admission back in the day. she only wants to do missionary I think, and she doesn't want to do any kind of build up or foreplay. she just wants to each of us take our own clothes off, and then me to just go inside her while she's still dry. she doesn't give me an opportunity to get her excited before she's just telling me to put it in.

I've tried talking to her about this, innocently suggesting we sit down and talk about some of the things in the bedroom that we like and don't like and things we may want to try. she initially agreed but as I was talking, I could tell by her body language she was really spacing out and completely over it. I didn't even bother to ask her her thoughts and instead asked her if she wanted to stop talking about it, to which she replied yes.

I'm not really sure what to do here. I'm just tired of trying to do anything different and she shuts it down immediately. stripping naked, me forcing myself inside her while she's still dry and slowly getting lubricated, going for 5 minutes, and then she just tells me to finish is the complete antithesis what I consider to be a healthy sex life. yet, she clearly does not want to talk about it so I'm kind of in a rough spot right now.

First of all, I also really want to learn not just for him but for myself! I love sex and me and my bf are super sexually compatible, we pretty much like all the same things and are always open to trying new things for eachother. 5 years and I couldn’t ask for a better sex life. One thing I still can’t do is deep throat unfortunately. I just can’t get it deep enough without feeling like am gonna throw up every time it touches the back of my throat. I’ve tried all kinds of things and positions, even silly stuff like freezing the back of my throat and holding your thumb or whatever lol. I know many people say just practice but I do, I try to go as deep as I can when giving normal bjs, but it’s not the same to when he actually tries to deep throat me. I only last like 10 seconds before it gets really uncomfortable. I really wanna know how to do it, I think it would be so fun and it slightly depresses me that I still can’t cause I feel like am missing out. If you have any tricks please tell me them.

I am a 31 year old male. I’ve been straight my whole life and never experienced anything but a woman’s touch. Dated a woman for over 8 years and almost had a child and got married. I’ve always thought male genitals were attractive but as of lately there is nothing more that turns me on. I honestly enjoy looking at penis more than a woman’s vagina. I have absolutely no attraction to a man other than when I see a nice penis and it makes my mind go crazy. Not sure this is because I’m in a dry spell or if this is actually what I truly want. Curious to hear from people who are going through the same thing or have gone through this before. Maybe I should just go through with giving oral and just figure it out? Maybe I’d regret it?

I am a young woman who has always defined herself as strictly heterosexual. I am physically and romantically attracted to men.However, there have been times when, on different occasions and only for a few milliseconds, I have felt curiosity or visual/physical attraction towards some female friends of mine.But the other day I went to a party in my city, I drank (not enough to be drunk, maybe a little less embarrassed), and I saw a girl I was attracted to, and I had a desire to hook up with her.Lately, this has also happened to me with other unknown women, for whom I've felt sexual attraction; however, I know for sure that I could never fall in love or be emotionally involved with a woman.

Hello, for some context, I'm 24 years old. I'm a transgender woman (still in the closet and untransitioned) and pansexual. I grew up in a very religious household and I've only recently come to terms with my gender and sexuality (maybe since I was 18?). I grew up very, very repressed and have OCD, meaning that actually being openly sexual or even being romantic is tough (I had to convince myself that I wouldn't go to hell for having queer attraction for a long time).

I've been in a long-distance relationship for the past two years with another trans woman and it's been really wonderful. She's taught me things about myself that I've never realized before. We've never "been intimate" but I feel very loved and can give love back, in a kind of relationship I've never been in before. But that's kind of what I want to open up about:

now I'm kind of a bigger person, my whole life I have been. I grew up very ashamed and angry over it. I discovered that I have a bit of a weight gain kink, not towards other fat people, but rather in a way of reclaiming it for myself and maybe even in a praise kink sort of way. I think a lot of this has to do with unmet needs. I want to find a way to embrace this instead of running away from it and feeling ashamed and dirty. My girlfriend is aware of it but I feel weird around her having told her. I don't know what to do.

So basically, it’s what the title says.

I (23F) have had this problem for a while now, and with more than one sexual partner (even if they weren’t particulary big and I felt relaxed and wet). I can take a finger or two but anything more than that hurts too much.

I’ve been sexually active for a few years, and I never had this problem before, but it has been going on for a while now.

Now, I’ve considered going to the doctor for this, but I would like to know if there’s something I could do to resolve this problem on my own. I’ve tried everything i could think of: lube (it did help a lot but not completely), foreplay, using toys by myself (to see if it was a relaxation-related thing that i couldn’t spot in the moment)… nothing has worked out and it’s really starting to weight on me.

I don’t know if this could have to do with the fact that I’ve been on the pill for about 4 years and/or the fact that I have a retroflexed uterus, although like I said before this pain it’s not something I’ve always experienced.

Any advice is appreciated, thank you.

For the past for years I have been struggling with an extremely low libido, as in practically non existent.

I have a partner with a more average libido, and while he’s been understanding I still feel bad about this mismatch.

I would like to find a way to increase my interest, and I figure other people must have had similar experiences.

So, for those who have been in this situation, what have you done to “meet in the middle” so to speak?

Thanks is advance for any help

I (31F) started seeing a new partner (26M) and I noticed I was somewhat uncomfortable riding him. He’s blessed with a beautifully sized and good looking dick but he’s not the problem lol. My hips felt locked and I couldn’t space my legs as wide as I wanted to lean back to grind comfortably. I either managed to sit upright and grind OR I would lean forward and tell him to thrust into me. I really enjoy riding him so I need some tips on how I can make it easier on myself.

I realized I have to work on my hip rotation because I have knocked knees and I assume that is affecting my hip mobility. What other positions can I improvise while I work on hip mobility exercises? (Also, if anyone has suggestions for knocked knees/hip mobility, I’d be really appreciative of the advice received!)

Extra info about me:
-I’m 5’7 and bigger in terms of size + weight. I’m on a wellness journey and aiming to shed body fat while building muscle.
-Late bloomer and this is my second partner. I’m focusing on my sexual needs yet I’m trying to avoid getting in my own head about physical attraction and lack of experience.

Extra info about him:
He’s 5’10 and thin yet sturdy 💪
He has more sexual experience than I do and communicates effectively, which helps me a ton.

My (21f) partner (22m) and I have been together for about a year. I loooove sex but he’s pretty low libido. We go through periods where we only have sex every 6 weeks to sometimes getting down and dirty 3x per week. I’m definitely more on the kinky/wild side and he is very reserved sexually.

Last night while I was a lil high on an edible, my boyfriend and I had sex after a bit of a weird conversation (mostly pertaining to how we didn’t know that either one of us had wanted sex that night since we just spent the last hour goofing around). Weird convo led to sort of weird sex.

It all culminated with him finishing himself off while I masturbated next to him and ending up offering for him to “cum on me”. The way he was positioned sort of made it so that I couldn’t get my boobs at the right angle so I instead had him cum in my mouth. I then sat up on my knees, spat the semen onto my breasts and let it then dribble down to my vagina. I flipped onto my back and went spread eagle so he could see me masturbate and finish myself off one last time using his cum as lube (it sorta went everywhere). I’m typically trying to be more vanilla with my actions around him because I don’t wanna freak him out! He seemed a bit gobsmacked and didn’t really know what to do so I started getting changed while apologising. I think being not-so-sober made me feel more empowered to do what felt good for me but also made it so that I did something my partner might’ve been a bit grossed out by. He reassured me it was okay and hot but it didn’t really seem sincere and then left.

I’ve tried so many times to suggest things we could try but he seems happy just doing what we do now. Sometimes we do try something slightly more risqué like me getting spanked while laying on his lap and he likes that. I think if he was more vocal and clear about what he did and did not like it would be easier for me to not get so confused about letting my guard down. I guess I just feel like I did something wrong last night even though I don’t think it should be a big deal. Bro doesn’t kiss me even if I’ve already swallowed the cum 😩

We are still young and I’m the only person he’s slept with so I guess I’m sort of wanting some feedback on if men would be weirded out by what I did or if they came out of their shell sexually the longer they were with someone kinkier than them. Thanks!!

Edit: I think I flaired this wrong mb fam

My boyfriend (19M) and I (19F) have been together for a little over a year now. We had been each other's first everything (relationship, kiss, date, fuck...) so we were both virgins. But even so, I was and still am more sexually experienced than him, in theory. Everything was great when we first got together and made love for the first time. And even before then, I was a heavy masturbator (idk u know what I mean). For the first couple of months, we were so excited and were wanting to explore each other and ourselves. But coming around to the past 6 or so months, it's felt somewhat underwhelming, plus the fact that it's just weird (if u catch my drift..). This is a tale of incompatibility, confusion, and unsatifaction:

My boyfriend is by default submissive, and also likes a finger or 3 up his ass. He's talked about wanting to be pegged, but I'm somewhat uncomfortable with that. Although I do finger him sometimes, because I'd like for him to get what he wants and feel pleased as well.

I am ALSO submissive, and I'd prefer he be the dominant one, but every time he tries, it just feels so unnatural. This is partially because he is smaller than me. Not shorter, just thinner and weaker, so it feels super stupid when he switches. I also feel like I would be more comfortable being dominant if he was bigger and or stronger than me. But as of now, it just feels like he's my GIRLFRIEND and not my BOYFRIEND. Respectfully it feels as if I'm dating a twink. (I love twinks, just not as my boyfriend)

DESCRIPTION: he's 5'5 115lbs with long, chest length hair (I love his hair and will only date guys with long hair). He OFTEN gets mistaken for a girl in public (because he looks androgynous and is literally gorgeous), and people sometimes shout homophobic slurs at us 🫩 but I don't care about the slurs

I've told him that I don't really feel comfortable with doing stuff like that, and that I prefer to be submissive, and he's so so understanding and tries his best to be "what I want". But when he thinks of it like that, he feels pressured and thinks that he's not what I want. What I want is him. Just him. However he is, as long as it's him. So I'm super attracted to him, and I try to let him know that as often as possible.

We aren't vanilla, but we do like to have vanilla sex with a few twists and turns and gadgets I guess. But there are SO MANY MORE ISSUES. His stamina is terrible, although it's understandable. He finishes before it even really starts to get good for me. And he also gets soft in the middle of sex ):which is so upsetting for the both of us, because I feel inadequate and he feels pressured. I also used to feel so much more at the beginning of the relationship, but now it just feels like friction in my vagina:(

Note: Other than this, our relationship is perfect. He is kind, loving, and genuinely the most caring person I've ever met. He treats me like a queen, no matter what. And he is incredibly loyal.

TLDR: My bf is a sub and I am too, but he is too awkward of a dom for me. Our sex is bad and just super sad, and I often want to cry after. He only lasts 4 mins and often gets soft during it. He also likes butt stuff (done to him) but that makes me uncomfortable because of his size (of his body). Idk am I terrible? What should I do?

Edit: I did not force him. We often communicate and try to meet in the middle.

Hello. I (36m) am in my first sexual relationship in 18 years. I am struggling with orgasming for my partner, I am abstaining from masturbation and it seems to be helping with sensitivity and really isn’t a loss to me. She particularly is upset at me not having orgasms from vaginal intercourse. We don’t do anal (neither of us want to), oral and hand jobs aren’t my thing. I love making her orgasm and it is always my focus. I don’t care if I finish because sex isn’t about me to me but I know it bothers her that I don’t finish.

I also struggle with scents during sex I get nauseous from us.

So I am here to seek help in being a better partner for her. I am apparently well endowed something I always thought I was not until now. She told me and then when I was shocked talking to my friends they told me I was an idiot because they had seen my outline when we went hot tubbing, swimming, and/or to hot springs and they confirmed it. I also am apparently really good in bed because I focus on her so much and “the way I look at her.” So she has orgasms regularly during sex.

I know this can seem self congratulatory, it’s not. I really need advice on increasing my ability to finish for her and to deal with my scent aversion other than pointing a fan across us away from my nose and towards a window.

I’m looking for some advice on ways I can improve things in bed with my boyfriend of 1.5 years,

I find myself to be a quite anxious person on the way I might look in bed I normally like to have some sort of coverage on either a bra or a T-shirt but I can’t seem to convince myself too often to just shed down is there anyway people have possibly worked around confidence in this part ?

I also adore giving head to my boyfriend probably my favourite and most enjoyed part of our sex life, he tried sitting on my face almost ? Idk how to describe but I had his balls in my mouth and dick facing to my boobs to which he cum all over them, I really enjoyed this it really gave me full access how do I initiate for him do this more often without feeling too forward- I also really enjoy just teasing so slightly over his anus with my tongue going from his balls to anus while rubbing his inner thighs, is there some way i can improve and make this more intensifying or exciting - thanks

title is kind of self explanatory. i (19FtX) have never been able to insert more than half of a finger into my vagina, which is painful. i also have a very small mouth, i cant fit more than my own finger in my mouth without feeling my teeth. i also have IBS, which blocks off my last big option there. in my life, i have only ever been able to orgasm after roughly an hour straight of clitoral stimulation, and I have been on anti depressants for two and a half years. I already struggle with getting dates as a nonbinary person in a republican area, and i dont know how i'm going to even attempt a first time. what do you even say when you know it'll end bad for either me or the person i'm with? i'm young and inexperienced so i'm probably overeacting but it feels hopeless and i'm wondering if any of you have any advice?

Hi guys! As the title mention, how would one usually respond to spicy images your partner sends you? I genuinely do not know how to, I just go speechless, get shy and compliment them on something they clearly do not want me to focus on. This was a problem with my last partner, too. Please drop some suggestions on what I could say, I think I’m just a bit shy and I don’t want my partner to feel like I don’t want them :/

I 20F have the perfect boyfriend. He is attractive, attentive, caring, gives me so much of his time and always does anything he can to make me happy, and it means so much to me. He works a 9-5 and I see him usually 3-4 times a week we play games together and he is the sweetest partner I could ask for, but there is one issue. I am very sexually unsatisfied. I am someone who I would say has a high sex drive and am into some very nonvanilla stuff. My boyfriend on the other hand is a little more vanilla and the thing he finds the most kinky is just 3somes and that’s fun sometimes but not really a big thing of mine, I would honestly like to do bdsm play in and a little outside the bedroom. He tells me all the time that he wants to try more kinky things and he’s interested in that but it just doesn’t ever happen. It is just like the desire doesn’t come naturally to him maybe. I have had talks with him before about switching things up trying more kinky things but we never really try much and it is also a turn off for my that he doesn’t have that natural desire to do those things to me. I feel really bad for getting sexually frustrated over this. We have sex about once a week, sometimes twice, but it is always one round lasting about 15 minutes sometimes there is a little face slapping or choking most kinky we have got is just rough sex using a vib. I wish we could do more than one round and try some new things but idk what to say to him. I don’t know if I should have a serious conversation about this I don’t know if this is something that can be changed or how I would go about helping him to feel more dominant, but it feels forced if i just teach him and he doesn’t it because it’s not like something he naturally desires to do i guess? I love him so much I don’t want our relationship to end over my carnal desires, I can’t imagine a man treating me as good as he does in our relationship, but i feel like i’m going kinda crazy from my repressed desires.
edit: I worded some of this kinda bad because I’m tired and in a bad mood but yea

I 23M had a sex recently 4-5 days ago I'm in FWB she is 23f. But I didn't enjoy that much last time I don't know the reason even the 1st half was quite well but then something went off and I didn't enjoy the rest. After coming back home I feel like having sex so I masturbated and now it's only been a week I want to have sex again. We live in different cities and I'm masturbating from the last 4-5 days regularly at night.

So I’ve had this issue for forever and I’ve asked some mates about it and none of them have had my experience.
Before sex I’m like an animal possessed, I cannot wait to rip her clothes off, see her naked, put my tongue in places no human should ever put their tongue, you get the point. I get so into it during the act I feel like I can’t get enough skin or touch her enough and I never want it to end. But then… the millisecond I come, I am absolutely disgusted with what I’ve just done. I cannot believe where my tongue has just been i get so repulsed by the person I’ve just had sex with I don’t wanna be anywhere near them. Like do not fucking touch me with your filthy hands. It’s actually so frustrating. Because in my head it would be nice to sit and cuddle or whatever but I am so disgusted with what’s just happened I physically can’t let myself. WTF IS WRONG WITH ME. The next morning I’m fine again I can wake up and want to go again which blows my fucking mind because literally a couple of hours ago I was repulsed by your very existence. I’m 35 years old, and a lot has changed about me since I’ve been sexually active, but this problem has been a constant all the way through.
Someone tell me I’m not alone?

So, I'm 18 and my boyfriend is 19. He has more sexual experience than me, since I only lost my virginity at the beginning of this year.

I've never met a guy so handsome, so kind, and who turns me on so much as him. But even so, it seems like what I feel is multiplied four hundredfold in his eyes.

For example, today I went to his house. We had sex once for about 30 minutes, and then I got a little tired even though it was extraordinary (my ex used to last a maximum of 20 minutes).

So, we lay down together, cuddling and kissing, but in less than 10 minutes he was hard as a rock again. I thought, "Okay, normal, I guess," and we did round 2.

We finished the second round, which lasted about 40 minutes, and by then I was already pretty exhausted, LOL.

Same thing: we were snuggling normally, but then I decided to play around a bit just to see his reaction and, again, the giant woke up. I was like "Oh my God???". He grabbed me and asked for a third round. I agreed, after all, I was also a little horny despite being tired. I didn't keep track of the time for that one.

Skipping ahead to the end of the date, while I was ordering an Uber, he asked for a quickie. I was exhausted, but wow, he's so good at it that I couldn't refuse. It lasted about 10 minutes.

In short, he came about 3 times (he didn't have time the last time). I also had an orgasm a few times, but now that I'm home I'm practically dead. As for him, although tired too, he still went to his college normally.

I even asked, "Don't you ever get tired? How many can you handle?", and he said, "With you, it's hard to get tired."

I feel very desired by him, not only for that reason, but for several other reasons as well. The problem is that I don't know how I can get as much stamina as him!!! I don't know if I get tired too quickly or if he's just tireless, but I really wish I could keep up with his level better.

If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know!

So my (26F) boyfriend (27m) have been together for almost 3 years, living together for about a year. When we first met we had a pretty fun and typical sex life. Maybe over the last year or two slowly our intimacy has declined. It’s to the point where I’m the only one who initiates sex, and a lot of the time he declines and says another time. I’d say we have sex once a month, sometimes every other month. If I never initiate we’d probably never have sex and he seems to be fine with that. I ask him why and try to talk about it but he just says I “try at the wrong times” but it seems it’s always a wrong time. He says he’s still attracted to me but never in the mood. Is this normal for a couple?

I (F) sometimes get a big singular pimple on my groin or buttocks, and right now I have one on my bikini line. I’m seeing a guy in two days, should I avoid sex right now so that it doesn’t pop…? How do I tell him that I can’t have sex because I have a ”zit near my clit”? I feel awkward about it.