u/nifty_crimple8892

This happened with a long running campaign that I currently am running. The problem player that we will just call “A” has been a good friend outside of DND but inside DND they are to put it lightly, a problem. They like to blame their ADHD and various mental issues for the way they are the way they are. And I’m not casting aspersions on other people for this behavior who also have mental issues or ADHD. That’s just been their excuse for what’s been happening.

A, will often get distracted themselves or distract other players while lore is being explained, that player is taking their turn, or is purposefully antagonizing me as the dungeon master in an attempt to piss me off. They treat the latter as winning at d&d. Previously, I had a long conversation with them about how wanting to piss me off when I’m just trying to run a fun and engaging game makes them a bad friend. They seemed to understand and the behavior died down. Until today.

While describing a scene to the table, A, wadded up their straw wrapper and threw it at my face while I was looking away. I froze, turned to look at A, and stared at them for a very long moment. They giggled and waited for me to explode. Part of me wanted to get up and walk out right then and there. But I said enough was enough. I looked right at A and said

“Your next turn is skipped. Do not throw anything at me.”

They argued that it didnt hurt me at all and I was taking things too serious. I told A that we talked about this before and that their behavior was unacceptable, and there would be consequences. A then flicked their straw at me, but it only hit my DM screen.

“That’s two turns skipped. Do you want to go for three?”

A got red in the face and argued some more but settled down after. They did not interrupt again or distract anybody while the consequences played out and when it was their turn again, two turns later, they participated accordingly and the session finished with everyone having fun. So, was I wrong?

So my dad and I have a really close relationship. Our birthdays are one week apart. And we pretty much have the same interest in a lot of nerdy things. So for my birthday this year, I decided to invite him to an event. It’s a bit of a surprise. I didn’t tell him what to expect just to have the afternoon off on this given day. He is really excited and is looking forward to it being just us.

Somehow my brother caught wind of this and wants to come. I told my brother that the event tickets are $80 a person. And my gift to Dad is a ticket to the event. I’m also paying for myself just because I don’t expect anyone else to pay for me. Not only does my brother want to come, but he wants me to pay for his ticket. After explaining to him that this was just for Dad and I. I further explained that if he really wanted to go, he had to pay for his own ticket.

My brother is now dragging every other member of the family into this. He’s crying to our grandparents. It’s all over his Instagram and Facebook. He’s essentially putting me on blast for this whole thing. My brother is 40. So tell me am I the asshole for not inviting my brother to my birthday event?

I (36m) and my gf (28f) have lived a comfortable, but by no means luxurious, life together for the last 4 years. We are both gainfully employed and while we both have our vices, we work together and have built our finances carefully.

Enter my older brother (38m). I love him and hes family but he’s also… problematic. He parties, he drinks, and drives like an A-hole. Sometimes in that order. You know that guy that cant take responsibility for their own actions? Thats my brother.

After his racist (his words) roommate kicked him out, my brother had nowhere to go. Family helps family right? Well he had already burned every bridge, which led him to my front door. We had a spare bedroom that was my game room but it became his room.

For the first 2 months he was perfectly pleasant. He was on time with bills and helped out around the house. Then he lost his job at the post office because his manager is racist (again, his words). Thats when my brother decided he wasnt going to just get another job. He was going to find himself and his purpose on this planet.

I sat my brother down and let him know that all that was fine and good but my gf and I weren’t going to let him freeload in our home. He would still need to contribute his share of bills and help out around the house. He assured me that nothing would change and he wouldn’t be a problem.

After the 1st month went by, I covered his share and told my gf not to worry. Then the 2nd month come and went and we had another talk. I told my brother straight up that he had to get a job soon and I wasnt going to fund this behavior anymore. The next day my phone blew up with angry voicemails and texts from my family.

“How dare you treat your brother that way” and “Hes family! You help your family!” But these were the same people who didn’t even try to help him either. So I said enough was enough and gave my brother a written 1 month notification that he needed to leave our home.

The very next day my mother blocked me, my grandparents wrote me out of the will and my brother began calling me by our father’s name. I had had enough of this situation. At the end of that month, I changed the locks and didnt let him back inside. We even had to get the police involved when he kept coming back to get his stuff slowly over the following weeks.

Family is family But I’m just the latest bridge he’s burned. Am I The Asshole?

UPDATE:
I didnt know “family is family” is a common AI phrase. I just included it because it was the saying most yelled/texted at me by my so-called family after everything went down.