u/no_insurance_money

I've had a hard time with group conversations all my life. I always prefer 1-on-1 interaction or 1-on-2 interactions, but once it get to 4 people it's like I just automatically start disengaging from the conversation and go quiet. I do listen to what everyone's talking about though, but often times I just start daydreaming or thinking about random things. It kind of feels like I'm not doing any of this on purpose, but I also feel like I should actually put in effort in this area.

My friend who works in special ed says that he notices that I generally take longer to respond to questions because I'm actually taking the time to think about my answer honestly. And group conversations are way too fast paced.

There's someone in one of my friend groups that just really annoys me. Recently, I feel like I've been quick to becoming irritated when we are hanging out as a group. Honestly, I haven't been like this with any of the friends that I had before. When it's just me hanging out one-on-one with another friend, it's all good. But when he's around, I feel like the dynamic just changes. He didn't necessarily do anything "wrong" or "bad" to me, but I think it might be incompatible personalities and I wouldn't hang out with him with just us alone. But I'm pretty sure he sees me as a friend though.

He gets me stressed out and I feel constantly pressured by him. He interacts with me like I'm a comedian and I'm just there to make jokes or do something funny when I don't feel like putting on a character for his entertainment. He constantly wants me to join in and take his side when laughing or talking about other people.

He would also just say things that would just make me mad. When I was introduced to a friend of a friend (who was black), he would make a joke saying that he hears me say the n-word all the time when I don't. He did it as a joke but that just pissed me off. He would also tell other people who got laid off that I have connections and could get them a job (I can't).

Asking me what I'm doing for my birthday, and trying to convince me that to go to the club and who we're inviting like I'm not allowed plan my own birthday (he's not going to be invited).

Also very pushy and insistent. It feels like he can't accept it when I say no to things like food, and he will still put it on my plate.

I feel like he just stresses me out everytime we hang out, and I get irritated and go nonverbal.

I'm 24M, turning 25 in a couple of months. Diagnosed with aspergers.

I've never had any romantic experiences or been on a date. And I don't think that anyone has ever liked me. I feel overwhelmed about being inexperienced as I get older. And also the things I have to do to start dating, especially having to learn social rules , flirting, and knowing what, how, and when to do certain things.

One thing that I've always struggled with is having to accept the initiator role that men have to do. Like approaching and asking a girl out. It's something that I still could not ever get myself to do. I've always been quiet, shy, and socially awkward. It feels like because of this, I'm locked out from experiencing love. Like not being shy or awkward is the prerequisite of someone loving you. I always felt like nothing else about you or your qualities matters anymore if you're shy or awkward.

I also always felt like if I was a girl with the same personality, someone else can approach me and ask me out and still love me despite being shy. It makes me sad that something like that can't happen to me because I'm a man.

I've only asked out 3 girls in my life (people that I at least knew personally) and I got rejected. I don't hate them, but I did have overwhelming feelings afterwards that I kept to myself.

I've had both male and female friends tell me I'm a good looking man. They would also let me know if a girl is checking me out or giving hints for me to go and talk to her, but I feel like my past experiences and how I grew up prevents me from taking the first step. It feels too much to do, I don't know what to say or how to act, I think it would go very awkward, and I ultimately feel that I would just disappoint them.

Im 24M, turning 25 in a couple of months.

I've never had any romantic experiences or been on a date. And I don't think that anyone has ever liked me. I feel overwhelmed about being inexperienced as I get older. And also the things I have to do to start dating, especially having to learn social rules , flirting, and knowing what, how, and when to do certain things.

One thing that I've always struggled with is having to accept the initiator role that men have to do. Like approaching and asking a girl out. It's something that I still could not ever get myself to do. I've always been quiet, shy, and socially awkward. It feels like because of this, I'm locked out from experiencing love. Like not being shy or awkward is the prerequisite of someone loving you. I always felt like nothing else about you or your personality matters anymore if you're shy or awkward.

I also always felt like if I was a girl with the same personality, someone else can approach me and ask me out and still love me despite being shy. It makes me sad that something like that can't happen to me because I'm a man.

I've only asked out 3 girls in my life (people that I at least knew personally) and I got rejected. I don't hate them, but I did have overwhelming feelings afterwards that I kept to myself.

I've had both male and female friends tell me I'm a good looking man. They would also let me know if a girl is checking me out or giving hints for me to go and talk to her, but I feel like my past experiences and how I grew up prevents me from taking the first step. It feels too much to do, I don't know what to say or how to act, I think it would go very awkward, and I ultimately feel that I would just disappoint them.

24M

I've spent my whole life being very quiet. I would barely speak with friends and family members. Once I got to college, I was very behind because I basically had little to no practice interacting with other people. I was extremely awkward and didn't know what to do in certain social situations and I could see and hear people laugh at me.

It wasn't until after COVID where I slowly had to build up my social skills and play catch up to others. I got lucky to make friends and coworkers who were gratefully very patient with me. I've worked as a substitute teacher for over a year now, and I'm going to student teach 1st grade next school year. I still feel anxious in certain and unstructured social situations though, but I stopped caring about what others thought about my awkward moments. I thought I was finally "normal".

It hurts that tonight, my friends invited some of their friends and coworkers for dinner at a restaurant. I struggle with group conversations and I usually go quiet and just listen or daydream. Anyways, one of my friend's friend is a special ed teacher. My friend told me that his friend basically was able to tell that I'm autistic. My other friend (who I never talked about my diagnosis with) basically said she knew I was autistic from how she noticed that I get overstimulated, my mannerisms, and how I avoid eye contact sometimes.

It sucks knowing that I'm still behind, even with all the effort I put in the past 4 years. I already have a hard time making friends (all the friends in my entire life initiated the friendship), and the prospect of romance seems unlikely for me.

I was just matched with a mentor teacher at my old elementary school. It's a 1st grade class, but I was trying to shoot for 2nd, 3rd, or 4th.

I was also told by my program to chat and see if my mentor and I are a good match. How did you guys check if you and your mentor were a good match?