u/noskillsonlyissues

i payed the amount but it didn’t show any confirmation and when i logged in again— it’s asking me to pay again. what should i do?

I’m from Jharkhand and I’m confused between BIT Sindri IT and IPU colleges like MAIT CSE or USAR AIML.
The main issue is fees. If I choose BIT Sindri, I probably won’t need to take an education loan. But if I choose USAR or MAIT, I’ll most likely have to take one because of the higher fees.
At the same time, I feel like studying in Delhi could provide better exposure, internships, networking, and off-campus opportunities. BIT Sindri’s placement stats seem fairly similar, but it’s in a Tier-3 city and isn’t particularly known for tech.
Would choosing an IPU college be worth taking a loan for, or would BIT Sindri be the better option considering the cost difference?

I’m from Jharkhand and I’m confused between BIT Sindri IT and IPU colleges like MAIT CSE or USAR AIML.
The main issue is fees. If I choose BIT Sindri, I probably won’t need to take an education loan. But if I choose USAR or MAIT, I’ll most likely have to take one because of the higher fees.
At the same time, I feel like studying in Delhi could provide better exposure, internships, networking, and off-campus opportunities. BIT Sindri’s placement stats seem fairly similar, but it’s in a Tier-3 city and isn’t particularly known for tech.
Would choosing an IPU college be worth taking a loan for, or would BIT Sindri be the better option considering the cost difference?

Yesterday, I got harassed just near my house. I was pretty shaken up. I couldn’t tell my parents or anyone about it. Since then, I’ve been feeling really scared to leave the house. And today, my result came out, and it didn’t go as planned. I thought I might hear something like “it’s okay, we saw your efforts, it’s alright, we’ll find a way,” but the reaction I got was different. It made me feel worse, like I’m being blamed for everything. I know I didn’t do well, but I wish I could feel a bit of kindness right now. I also feel like I’m not being prioritised enough emotionally. Yesterday, I was already feeling like nobody really checks up on me or notices how I’m doing. And I know people say parents always care and prioritise you, but I don’t feel that right now, even from them. I haven’t eaten in the last 24 hours, and no one has checked up on me once.

My cousin had asked me for some books. She needed some textbooks, so I was like yeah, I have them, don’t buy new ones, I’ll give you mine. So I was looking for them and asked my mom to help me. Then when she found out my cousin was asking for them, she got mad because her and my cousin’s mother don’t get along. But like… do I gaf? No. That’s my sister, I care about her.

Then she started yelling at me for not cleaning my room and saying the whole room is a mess. I was already emotional because of what she said about helping my cousin, so I got mad too. I told her her clothes are also thrown around the room, and she was like “you’ll compare me with you?” and I said “why not? kids learn from their elders.” Then she started saying I don’t know how to talk to elders, and I said “have you ever seen how you talk to me?” Then she twisted my words into “so you’re saying I’m a bad parent?” and I was pissed, so I said yes.

I was really fueled up and said a lot of other stuff too. But the nerve that she can’t even accept when she’s wrong and now has the audacity to cry.

She has cursed at me, called me names, hit me, and spoken rudely to me just because she was in a bad mood. And now she’s surprised by the way I talk to her? Like how do you expect someone to grow up hearing all of that and not eventually respond the same way back?

And the thing that hurts the most is that I was literally just trying to help my cousin by giving her books she needed so she wouldn’t have to spend money. But instead of understanding that, it turned into a fight about everything else.

It’s not like I’m naturally mean or anything. I’ve noticed the difference myself the way I talk to my mother versus the way I talk to literally everyone else. I could never be intentionally cruel to other people because I know how much words can hurt.

Now she’s fucking crying, making herself the victim, wow.

I just got done with exams. I'm free as fuck and I don't really wanna spend my holidays away bedrotting. So tell me about some events art or ed related.

I don’t like my mother’s mother. She’s the worst person I’ve ever met. I dislike her so much that I don’t even feel a shred of pity for her. It’s that bad and trust me. It wasn’t like that always. At first I thought that maybe it’s because I don’t have a habit of living with new people, so it’s just because my personal space is being invaded. But man my patience is being tested every day in this house. she moved in with us in 2020 after my father‘s death because my mom is a nurse and some weeks she works Night Shift, so she just needed someone to look after me at night, so she came to stay. and that’s when it started I don’t really appreciate people having opinions for me. I would not accept it if someone else yelled at me other than my parents, hell even my own dad never yelled at me and she had the audacity to say shit make comments on my clothes saying that I shouldnt wear this or not. Dude, you are not paying for me, so you should not have an opinion. It’s not even like coming out of care. It’s just like she wants to say something like bitch stfu. and this is not just this my mother she lost her father at a very young age, and this woman instead taking care of her kids, decided to marry another man and sent my mum to a relative’s house where they used to make her do house chores, She was 7. She basically sold her own child off. Never cared for my mother, never even thought of her about how she must be doing living in someone else’s house at such a young age. I spent a week in my aunt’s house and man. It was hell. I hated it. even if they were nice, the feeling that you get of being an outcast, it never leaves you. My mother also had a brother, so when he got married her wife and my grandmother didn’t get along. So one day, my mom‘s brother’s wife just kicked her out, and she had no place to go, so she came to our city but at that time, my dad was alive, so she couldn’t stay with us. but now night, my dad is not here. She’s living with us. At that time i felt bad for because she shouldn’t be kicked out of her own house, but now I hundred percent see the reason why she was kicked out. whenever people come over to my house, she bitches about them in front of them. like how can someone be such a bad person? I love animals and I have lot of animals in my house and every chance she gets she just screams at them or hit them and it pisses me off so much. and there are so many more things I could literally keep complaining about her, but what pissed me off and just took me to my limit today was that I have an exam tomorrow and I hate it when people invade my privacy, even my mother doesn’t come inside my room when I’m studying, and she walked in four times. It’s alright. I don’t mind it, but she didn’t close the door after here every time she came in, and I had to get up from my bed and go to the door to close it four times. I’m so anxious about tomorrow’s exam. I can’t focus, and this was like my limit, bro. She is such a bitch brolike if you if you even try to talk to her, she’ll just bitch about people or talk shit about the people she will be nice in the face to. Today, my uncle came in the morning and he said that he was really hungry, so like there was some roti and Sabzi, he ate it. And when he was gone she started saying “ ye log ko toh bhook hi lagta h, apna ghar ma khanna nai milta h”. Like bruh you’re living off my mum’s earnings, in my dad’s house and the audacity to say that. I’m so fed up bhai. I don’t even speak to her. Just seeing her in the same room as me boils my blood.

Sometimes when I feel like talking to God, I randomly open the Bible, and whenever I land on a chapter that deeply reflects exactly what I’m going through, it genuinely feels like God is communicating with me through reflection and scripture.

Maybe I’m overthinking it. Maybe some people would call it delusional. But isn’t that part of what faith is? Believing that God can meet you where you are?

Recently I’ve been having a really rough time emotionally. A few days ago, I remember praying and asking God to please not test me anymore because I genuinely felt like my heart couldn’t take much more. I felt like I was at my breaking point.

Today I found this very old Bible I’ve had for around 7–8 years and hadn’t opened in ages. I randomly opened it and landed on Hebrews 12. The chapter talks about endurance, chastening, and “for whom the Lord loves He chastens.”

And strangely, it comforted me.

Not in a “everything is suddenly okay” way, but in a way that made me feel like maybe my suffering is not meaningless, and maybe I shouldn’t lose faith even when things feel unbearably heavy.

But at the same time, I’m still scared. I still feel like I’m at my limit. I know people say God has better plans, but honestly, I can’t afford to fail this exam. I don’t think I can handle another thing going wrong right now.

Just yesterday I was complaining about the heat, seems like god heard my plea.