u/nunyabizzzzznesssss

I posted here a little over a month ago. These are some updates from my build. If you’d like to know more about me / what I’m looking for, I detailed quite extensively:

https://www.reddit.com/r/ruralR4R/s/5M6Aa0CYHS

I’m so grateful I get to live like this. A supremely chill existence.

Capricorn Sun and Moon. Virgo Rising. A 7/7 in numerology.

I almost obliterated my life (by my standards) in my 20s because I sincerely thought I could be a rockstar. I had fun playing music, but the associated lifestyle wasn’t sustainable, profitable, or meaningful anymore. It was as though the curtain had been pulled back. Throughout that time, however, I still needed to work just to scrape by.

I symbolically got fired from a job I’d held the day before I turned 30. Fired because I showed up blackout drunk to a company party. My reputation with the owner never recovered. And it was deserved. I was a total mess.

I decided to turn my life around that day and start grinding. Immediately. I moved back home with my parents, 1,000 miles away from the metropolitan city I’d been living in for the previous 7 years… They’re total saints.

I hustled Craigslist for design jobs and found one that was, ironically, based out of the very city I’d just left. The gig was designing Challenge Coins. The pay was $24 per coin completed. A coin could take anywhere from 5 minutes to 2 hours to design. Still, it worked out to great money if you were willing to work hard.

I used the money I earned to pay off irresponsible debts. Mainly incurred from bars I’d frequented. In total, around $15,000.

(Live in a city. Spend at least $100 at a bar 20 times a year for 7 years. Make $15 an hour. Live paycheck to paycheck. Put everything on a credit card. Enjoy your tab. It’s not worth it.)

I made coins around the clock. If there were designs in the hopper, I was willing to tackle them. I paid off my debts and, for the first time in my adult life, was able to save money. Then COVID hit, and my gig disappeared.

I’d applied for hundreds of jobs while I lived in the city. Any that I would’ve considered “career-worthy” never hired me. I finally got my foot in the door at one of them and was granted an interview. I thought I nailed it. I involuntarily cried on the phone while talking to my Dad when I read the email saying not only did I not get the job, but for “litigious” reasons they weren’t allowed to give me an explanation. It was a mini-breakdown before I composed myself.

I only held two jobs while I lived in the city. Both were design-related. I hated each for different reasons. I felt trapped in both. I shouldered so much putrid hatred for those jobs over the course of seven years that it manifested physically in the form of a benign-tumor. A giant lipoma appeared on the back of my neck. I had surgery after moving back home to get it removed. It took seven stitches to suture my skin back together.

COVID closed many doors, like my coin gig, but it opened some too. So many people were working from home for the first time. An agency ended up hiring me. Salaried position with benefits and what-have-you. It wasn’t a big salary.

That was okay. Since they gave me a chance after all the career turmoil I’d experienced, I chose to give them staunch, ride-or-die levels of loyalty. I’ve been working my way up ever since. I’m currently a Senior Designer with a Junior Designer under me. I try to be very thoughtful while showing her the ropes.

I’ve been sweating and saving for the past seven years. I’ve had almost no downtime. Trying to stack as much money as I could as a Graphic Designer (fucking hellish career path). Enough that I’ve been able to secure six acres in the middle of nowhere and put 20% down on a construction loan.

My life in the city looked like this: wake up hungover, be late to work that’s five minutes away, pretend to work (kill time on the internet), get off work, go to band practice, drink, maybe have a gig, party hard, smoke a pack of cigarettes, pass out at 6:00 A.M., press snooze on the alarm 20 times starting at 7:00 A.M.

I feel like I have more regrets about my decisions in my 20s than I have pride in the lifestyle I lived. I did some really dangerous and impulsive things… to the extent I can look back on that period as though it were a different person. That’s not really “me.” Then or now. It was insincere and performative. I don’t know what came over me other than ending up on a kind of slippery slope which descended into various forms of what I’d describe as “mental illness.”

My true nature is that of a loner… a hermit. Things somehow started working for me when I embraced that explicitly. It’s been odd.

I’ve spent almost all my time alone these past seven years. I’ve tried to reflect deeply on my life, understand who I am, and cull some really toxic traits I’d developed. I’m not perfect, though. I literally told a lady she needed to “fuck off” at a gas station the other day when she accused me of looking at her “so angrily.” I wasn’t, by the way. I felt as though she was “shooting at my feet” and I wasn’t dancing.

I’ve personally found that keeping one foot on the ground with the other in the obscure is a better approach than living exclusively in one or the other.

One of the things I’m looking forward to most is recording more music about my experiences in this house. It’ll be made in obscurity. I’m done with people. I’m dropping out of society. I couldn’t be more excited.

This has been an abbreviated version of my slow-and-steady ascension story.

The Capricorn characteristic I resonate with most.

Hello,

The basics about who I am are below. I’d like to talk to someone and share more in private. I can send pictures of how I look there. I’m currently in the thick of building what I intend to be my forever home. Although, it might end up as my forever bachelor pad. It’s in a rural part of Western Kentucky.

If I don’t put myself out there in some capacity, I’ll never meet anyone. This is a “niche” lifestyle choice… My house is probably another 4 months out from completion. Been on the grind for many years to try and make this possible. So much so, that dating for the most part went out the window. “The farm” will make a nice spot to share life with someone.

I value holistic-approaches and “chill” existences.

Reach out if you’re curious!

Age: 37

Location: Rural Western Kentucky

Height: 5’9”

Weight: ~170 lbs

Build: Athletic and do some form of exercise daily.

Career: Senior Designer (remote)

Politics: Right-leaning / Libertarian / cynical / not “vaxxed”

Religion / Spirituality: Spiritually curious

Relationship: Monogamous, never married, no kids

Pets: Black cat

Living: Building a 2,000 sq. ft. house on my 6.25-acre field that’s surrounded by farmland. To make it clear, I only own the field and a barn that’s on the site. There’s also a few neighbors. Most are retired.

Hobbies: Music, guitar, recording, art-related endeavors, learning how to cook, fitness, collecting vinyl, learning random things, obscure films, dark humor / being a goof. That’s not a hobby, but more of a personality-trait. I’d like to get into hiking, and gardening in a more-sincere way. Especially with all the space I have. I enjoy to watch YouTube videos for landscaping ideas. Currently contemplating creeping thyme…

I have a bucket list of a few places I’d like to visit one day. That said, I like being on “the farm” more than anywhere else.

Lifestyle: Non-smoker. Rarely drink. Working toward an even healthier lifestyle. A “I have a plan” kind of personality. I enjoy a leisurely existence, but also work hard. I’d like to meet someone who recognizes this, and wants to help maintain a certain standard of living within our means. It’s been a huge undertaking to do this and I want an actual, symbiotic partnership. Being alone is superior to anything “toxic.”

Zodiac: Capricorn

Looking for: Long-term relationship with someone who has similar values. Hopefully a relationship that would lead to marriage.