u/nuskit

My husband died a few days ago & will be direct cremated. We're in TX (USA) and I can't get his fingerprint unless I either buy an insanely expensive stainless steel pendant, or pay nearly $700 to see his body for the cremation. Is this stuff normal? Like, it should not be this difficult to get a freaking fingerprint. And they won't do a digital copy, just this stupid piece of pot metal with a vague imprint.

How do you get around this? I feel like they just sucked me in and are holding him hostage. I worked in law enforcement and in hospice. I've seen & handled bodies, I handled, bathed and shrouded *his* body. I've hung out in the morgue, and now I look like a complete psycho trying to figure out if I can lift a good print off a toothbrush or a bottle of Listerine. It's either that or pay $700 and get a friend to distract the employees while I pull his prints.

Is there a better way? We didn't have a lot of money to just fling hundreds of dollars beyond the nearly 3 grand for the direct cremation (no urn). I feel so stupid that I didn't even consider grabbing his fingerprints, because, ya know, mourning.

I'm legitimately open to suggestions from people that know the business or a way around this insanity.

Editing to add: this is Neptune Society, in TX.

My husband died June 26th, right after our 26 year anniversary and my 46th birthday. It's always been us against the world, just the two of us. We never wanted/needed anyone else.

It's been just a few days and while I love our pets, I don't want to live anymore. I'm curled up with them all, and I know they would be lost without me, but a big part of me feels resentful that I have to stay alive for literally *decades* to take care of them (we adopted two kittens 10 months ago & have 3 dogs).

I married him when I was 19. He was diagnosed with cancer 3 days before our anniversary, and died 6 weeks later in my arms at home.

I'm not mad AT him, but I'm so angry with the situation that I have to stay alive; and so frustrated with our pets. And it's not their fault. They're as shattered as I am. I just wish we could all go to sleep and stay that way, so nobody's left behind. Our plan was to end it all together, when I was is my early 60s and him in his mid 70s and the animals had gone. And now the plan is broken.

Yes, I have a therapist and a psychiatrist. But, really, how do you cope with resentment of the ties that force you to stay alive? The guilt of these feelings is tearing me up. I can't eat, I can't sleep...nothing since he died. But I have to at some point, or the animals suffer.