u/open-print

Sorry for the stupid post, but this technique literally helps me better than anything else I tried. My bf and I broke up on "amicable" terms, as in no arguing, he decided to just quit one day and I was blindsided.

But then I started looking back at everything he did, and he really tried to screw me over financially and when I didn't fall for it, he broke it up. Then two months later he sent me string of angry messages, mocking and belittling me. I had no idea how much resentment for me he was holding.

But occasionally I think back to some cute or gentle memory and smile like a fool. Bam. Spray bottle. I just imagine is spritzing me. And I repeat "He was a bad man, he was a bad man" in my head until the memory is over. Works like a charm.

It's one, admittedly very dumb, way to keep my brain in check with reality lmao

My ex broke up with me out of the blue two months ago. Days prior we were talking about marriage, a kid and a house we were going to buy. It was the worst shock of my life. A week later when I went to get my things, I asked him to reconsider, but two days after that he just told me there's no future for us.

We went no contact during those two months, I didn't want to be rejected again and he didn't reach out. I assume he doesn't want me at all, I have to assume that, and all the things we said about our future were all lies. He bought our dream house alone, with his father's help.

Now he is moving and there are some last things I left at his place. We will meet tomorrow so he can give them to me. His message was something like "I can leave them over at friend's place or give them to you at [parking lot]." He obviously doesn't hope for this meeting to mean anything.

The thing is I still love him and I wish there was a way for us to reconnect. I'm torn between acting happy, carefree and nonchalant so he can see what he is missing. Or straight up asking him if it was all a lie and telling him how cruel his behavior was and how much he hurt me.

The first one is better if there is some part of him doubting if he made the right choice. The second would give me some semblance of closure. Either way, this will most likely be the last time we see each other, ever. What should I do?

Every morning I wake up and the first thing I think of is my ex, who broke up with me 6 weeks ago. I always lose the will to get up and go to work and continue without him there.

Well, not today. Today I woke up happy and at peace and it took me a moment to realize I had a very real dream of us getting together and apologizing and deciding to wok on our relationship. The crash of that being a dream was unreal.

I have been slowly getting better these past three weeks, thinking about him a bit less, not crying every day. It's like today reset the whole process and I'm back at square one. Crying multiple times a day, feeling it as raw as when it happened. Fuck, I don't want to continue like this. He threw me away without remorse, with no warning signs except a few lies I only realized in hindsight. I asked him to not give us up and work on it and he didn't want to. We had plans to get married and buy a house, all gone.

If I could stop this stupid illogical love I have for that cruel man, I would do it in a heartbeat.

So, two months ago we planned a vacation together. I said we planned, but I came up with the idea, found and booked flight tickets that were a great deal, made a rough itinerary for which day will be spend where because my boyfriend doesn't like to be bored and then we booked the hotel and airbnbs for all the locations together. It was all with his blessing, but I did all the research and the work. We paid for it half and half.

A month later he broke up with me. Gave me a list of tiny annoyances, said I was "getting on his nerves", even though he hasn't communicated any of them once. Said he's not good at communicating and he was expecting more of me in terms of meeting his expectations.

We had 10 months of what I though was an ideal relationship. I put so much work into too, and rarely, if even, complained, we had no arguments, we came up with all these creative outlets and adventures together. I loved him with all my heart and this came out of the blue.

My work has been extra stressful lately and I was really looking forward to going to this vacation with him. He sent my half of the money back. Mutual acquaintance told me he's leaving for his vacation today. It broke me again, a month later.

This was supposed to be the happiest time of the year for me. Instead, he is choosing to travel alone, on a trip that I came up with, because that's better than being with me. And I feel like I'm stuck.

I don't know why, this feels like the final nail in the coffin. He doesn't want to be with me. I hate that he ruined all we had without trying even a little bit. Honestly, I kind of hate him right now.

First relationship, first love, first time broken up with. It lasted 10 months, ended very suddenly and coldly. First two weeks after breakup I was a mess, but this last week I am more angry about my ex lying to me than missing him. Even if he apologized now, I cannot imagine going back to him.

But I do miss having someone to call mine and to love. Soo... I downloaded Tinder, again, first time in my life, just to try it. I matched with a guy and he wasted no time asking me out. Just for a coffee and it's very likely we may not even be a fit anyway.

But, you know, what's the protocol? Should I wait more than a month to date? Should i jump into it and try to focus on the myself and my future? I have never been in a situation like this before.