u/outersenshi

It might come off a little selfish writing this, but I just don’t think our team should be rescheduling WORK events to fit the schedule of a non employee.

I work with a great team. They’re all pretty cool, we get along well and our team is pretty small within a pretty small department for our larger company. I am newer to this team but not to the department. I came from our main office. One thing I have noticed with this team is that we have a part time coworker who feels like her husband should be included in our functions.

A couple months ago we had a meeting announced to us. It was going to be a “lunch time” meeting to discuss some changes and work things. The coworker, Cece, asked if her husband could join us and what the menu would be. She was reminded it was a work hours thing and she kinda slumped her shoulders and said “ok.” Then came back to the office and let him know he couldn’t come (over the phone).

This week we are having another work function. Originally it was supposed to be lunch to get together as a team, catch up, celebrate and hang out. Well Cece let us know her husband really didn’t wanna miss this one and lunch was just not going to work for Wednesday and asked if Thursday dinner was acceptable. Our boss approved because nobody rejected, but I just keep thinking about how we have WORK functions either during or after working hours and Cece’s husband has to be part of them. Our department is small and a lot of coworkers know each other’s personal lives on some level. We have met a majority of each other’s spouses, partners, kids, some parents, etc but Cece is the only team member whose husband has to have an active role in our functions.

Maybe it sounds selfish, but I feel like not every function needs to include Cece’s husband. Especially when, from my understanding, he’s a pretty busy guy who runs youth groups and charity events and things. If Cece wanted to spend time with her husband regularly she could invite him to eat with her in one of our building’s 4 lunch rooms. His office is across the street and half a block down from ours. An 8 minute walk from our office. Or she could go to his office for lunch.

I should add that I don’t have anything against Cece’s husband. He genuinely seems like a nice guy and we get along. I’m not entirely sure if she is asking on his behalf then telling him to come along or if he is asking to join our events, but it feels a bit pushy sometimes to make room for or reschedule whole events for someone who doesn’t work for/with us, doesn’t plan to and then sits there quietly and answers everything with one word answers.

At my previous job I was a manager who worked with another manager, Paula, who suffered a majority of the side affects of a bad personality including meth abuse, mood swings, lashing out, erratic behavior, getting high at work, stealing from the safe, a generally terrible attitude, etc etc. she was a terrible coworker and always tried to frame me and get me fired or tried to write me up for various made up reasons. Not a single shared shift was ever pleasant with her. After a couple years of dealing with her and going through 6 months of interviews, I finally got a new job!

When I was omw out I told my boss and he was sad. I told him he could “fire the drug addict or watch me leave.” He told me corporate wouldn’t allow it and then told me I was the only one keeping him sane so if I was leaving, he was leaving. Later that day when Paula was starting her shift she came up to me and said “hey. I know we don’t get along, but I promise to leave you alone all week this week and next. No BS, no bullying, I won’t say a word to you unless I have to if you could do me one favor.” I smiled and asked what her favor was and she said “I need someone to cover my shift next Saturday. I can’t work that day and if I can’t find coverage I have to come in.” I just nodded and said “sure. Update the schedule and let boss man know.” At the beginning of the next week I gave boss man my notice. My last day would be the day before I was to cover Paula. Paula didn’t find out until my last day because we agreed on her avoiding me that week. She did have to work a half day after all (too bad), but after putting up with all her sabotaging and sending emails to corporate that got nowhere and the mediation meetings that went nowhere and the trainings we were subjected to because of all the complaints from staff about Paula. I felt like this little bit of harmless petty revenge was justified. I mean, the day before a visit from corporate regarding an “anonymous” complaint about animal welfare she basically boiled the fish in the tanks alive and tried to blame me…until the guy from corporate learned that she had the only key to the temperature control room at that time and kept it hidden.

I’m traveling to Chicago at the end of June and heard that Naka Toys in Chicago has a Lab Tama. Can someone confirm if this might be the case? I really want to plug into one!

Thank you