Met a guy on hinge, went on 2 amazing dates, then got ghosted. Was I love-bombed or was this just bad timing?
I’m 27F and I met this guy 27M on Hinge while I was staying in his city. I was instantly drawn to him as he was 100% my type. We’re both in the medical field, he’s down to earth, kind, smart, my type physically, and seemed emotionally mature.
We matched one night and instantly clicked. We ended up chatting until around 3 AM even though we both had to wake up really early the next day. The conversation felt so natural and fun that I honestly thought he was a catfish (he wasn’t).He was very vocal about what his intentions were, he wasn’t into casual dating and so was I. After 2 days of talking, we decided to meet up. I was EXTREMELY nervous (this was my first date with someone I had actually never met before). I was legitimately thinking about bailing when I saw him arrive holding a bouquet of roses. So yeah, our first date went really really well, and I think we both knew it. He told me it was the best first date he’d ever been on. We went on a second date the day after. He was a complete gentleman: gave me flowers on both dates, opened my doors, paid for everything, and even bought food for my friends back in our apartment just because. He genuinely wanted to spoil me which I wasn’t used to. We also had a lot in common personality-wise and in terms of personal values. He was pretty forward with his intentions. He said he wanted to meet my friends, and even my mom.. I was sort of taken aback, like was this a red or green flag?! He offered to visit me back home to meet my entire family. He asked me about long distance, if I was willing to do it. He also made a lot of future plans: he invited me to watch him play basketball later that month, invited me and my friends to a food festival, etc. A lot of these types of conversations were initiated by him, not me, because I was trying not to come on too strong. I let him take the lead, I was very happy. Mind you, we never even kissed. At most, we just cuddled in the movie theater on our second date. You know how when you actually really like someone, you just kinda wanna keep it wholesome? That’s what I felt and I could tell he was the same. He was a complete and utter gentleman. After our second date, he dropped me home and his last text to me was that he’d gotten home. After that, radio silence. I was SO confused. I kept racking my brain as to what I did or said wrong, there wasn’t really anything.. All I can think of was when I asked him about instagram (he’s not on ANY social media at all, lowkey a red flag to me), I asked him if maybe he could make one so I could send him reels lol. That’s it… he just seemed like he really wanted to make a real effort with me. He even offered to write me a recommendation letter for residency (he was ahead of me).
So about a week of silence, I was still in his city and my friends encouraged me to just message him one last time because I literally had nothing to lose LOL. So I sent something like, “Hey, I didn’t think you were the kind of guy to ghost. Is everything okay?” He replied within 10 minutes and said he was sorry, but he had to go back to his hometown because his mom had been diagnosed with breast cancer…
Honestly, I have no way of knowing if that was bullshit and this entire time he’d just been telling me what I wanted to hear or he’s genuinely going through something. I literally can’t know for sure because I didn’t know him enough 😭. But he really could have just said something, anything to let me know he wasn’t available anymore. This entire experience just really messed with me on a deeper level than my ex of 3 years did which is insane and impressive. I feel like I’m going into psychosis. Help
TLDR: I 27F met this guy 27M on hinge, we hit it off and he was definitely my type. After 2 great dates, he ghosted me. His excuse was his mom was diagnosed with cancer. I can’t tell if I was just being lovebombed or he’s genuinely going through something