I’m ‘F 26’ and he’s is ‘M28’
I followed him on insta and he followed back, even though he has a very small follower/following list, not many girls. We only exchanged 2-3 messages and then he left me on delivered. It’s been 36 hours.
For context he’s not very active on Instagram, this morning his last activity was 12 hours ago and
sometimes he’s more active. What’s going on?
He seemed curious but I don’t know what to thinks
Need honest opinions because this has been messing with my head. My gf once told me she got “dickmatized” by a situationship before me. Later I found out she was still following the dude on TikTok, but when I brought it up she said she genuinely didn’t realize she still followed him and blocked him immediately. She also reassured me and said I’m the best she’s ever been with.
But mentally I’m struggling to understand how both things can be true at the same time. Like if another dude had you THAT hooked before, how am I suddenly the best? Is “dickmatized” more of an emotional/toxic attachment thing than actually meaning the sex was better?
I’m trying not to overthink it because she did reassure me and cut the dude off without arguing, but that word keeps replaying in my head. Would this bother y’all too?
I held her naked in my arms as she slept. The next morning she asked for more sex, praised me endlessly, and asked me to make plans for more dates as I left.
I sent plans we had already discussed, and offered the logistics. I didn’t hear from her all week.
When I asked her what was going on, she told me I shouldn’t expect to be family level of priority.
I told her it made me feel anxious
She told me she doesn’t know what to do about that
I said I’m confused because she had expressed real feelings for me and had seen me for 2 months
Now she’s calling me later and I’m terrified and I feel physically sick.
its been 3 years since my first gf left me on read.. it really messed up my mental health, went overthinking everyday.. my anxiety has never been this bad befoure
I (26F) have been talking to and going on weekly dates with a guy (28M) for 5 months. Throughout that time we were exclusive. Recently we both got really busy and hadn’t seen each other for a while. I told him that if he wasn’t interested anymore that’s totally fine I’d just like him to be honest and we can just end it there but he reassured me that he was still interested multiple times so I kept talking to him. Our most recent text conversation was him asking me when I was free and I replied telling him what days I was available and he hasn’t replied since. That was 2 weeks ago. I’m confused why he didn’t take the easy out I gave him and insisted we still try to make plans just to ghost me after I told him when I was free. I’ve never been ghosted before by someone I’ve been on more than 1 date with and it’s so brutal. I don’t understand why people do this instead of just ending it properly.
Classic situation, she came crawling back to me on social media and I took the bait. First person that I’ve met to say that I shouldn’t be ashamed of a certain physical insecurity that I have. That, along many other special things, is why I was dumb and took the bait despite my friend’s advice.
I don’t know if I’m capable of dealing with the next time she’ll come back. One thing I do know though, is that I’ll be going to therapy for dealing with this. Im tired of this pain so fucking bad, and I’m a pilot so the faa will be on my ass for this. It’s either i abandon a future as a pilot that will make me hundreds of thousands of dollars bc of therapy, or I don’t go to therapy and not learn how to sort out these things.
I (M 30) met this girl (F 28) about 6 months ago and I just was vibing nothing to it. Then we started talking everyday. She initiated it. We would talk for hours, inquire about our daily wellbeing etc. EVERY SINGKE DAY FOR THE LAST 6 months. Mainly on FaceTime. I will say that I initially did not develop feelings but overtime I did. Whenever we would hangout she never let me close physically, even playfully taps. I told her my thoughts a few months ago and she shut it down and said we should remain friends.
Honestly, I thought I could do it. No biggie. Then one day we went to an occasion and I saw her with another guy and I lost it. Internally. I drank myself to stupor and had to be taken home by someone else. It was devastating. I remember asking her out on a date a few days after. She agreed and at the very last minute she canceled. I was calling her phone and she didn’t pick up. So I don’t hear from her that night and for the next 2 days. Then she calls 2 days later to apologize saying that she got scared because she doesn’t trust herself with alcohol around me. I was like okay. She enjoys my company and me hers more than friends. She could call and we could talk for hours, come to my place and vice versa, go to places. People even think we’re together.
Now, don’t get me wrong, this girl has been the nicest person I’ve met in a while. We have a very strong emotional connection which is where I think my problems begin. This is the third straight time In the last 4-5 years where I have started talking to a girl and getting to know her and by the time I develop feelings and ask her out, it gets shutdown and obviously the relationship is done from there. I would usually pretend to be okay or try to keep the peace but it literally kills be each time.
So I ended things with her a few days ago. I’m in severe pains and mourning the relationship. I honestly don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I have tried to date casually but it doesn’t do anything for me. I can’t compartmentalize and can only talk to one person at a time. So for example for the last 6 months talking to this girl, I haven’t had any other romantic interests or trysts.
I’m also frustrated that it seems I am always been used as the emotional support animal and then when here’s other guys that they go to have fun with. That’s okay. Nobody owes me anything. I would very much prefer if people called and were emotionally available to those people they have fun with. Because, on my end it seems I am just giving and getting nothing in return unless I too choose to diversify my sexual interests.
I know she wanted a platonic friendship but I felt that it was too close and the investment from me was too much. I would like to start a family and I realize that as adults to w main currency we use to interact with each other is time. I don’t want to invest time I don’t have into something that’s not going anywhere.
This is the third straight time it’s happening so I’m convinced the issue is internal. What can I do to change this? Because I don’t see any evidence that it won’t happen again and I don’t know if I have the will to go through this again. Any feedback would be appreciated.
I am feeling heavy so just wanted to get it off my chest. I am a guy and I was a friend with this girl for last 3 years. It was on/off relationship. We had our share of fights but after few weeks we would get back and it would be like nothing has happened. I treated her like a friend and been there in her ups and downs. She was going through the issues in her personal life and I was there for her on everytime. I was on her speed dial for any issues other than her family members.
Last december, she had an issue with her living situation and wanted to get an apartment for herself. She had money issues so she asked my help. She asked for $1000.She said that this would be a loan and she would pay it back. This all happened on text messages. In February, she got the apartment with my help and just to get my confidence she paid back $100. I said that its fine as we are not going to stop meeting. That was my biggest mistake. She kept me in dark about one part of her life and within 15 days of moving into the apartment, she got married to her childhood froend. She did not bother to tell me about her wedding. When I found out, I felt blindsided by this sudden development. When I asked her about this, instead of responding to me, she blocked me. Now I am feel like someone has cheated me off my $900.
I know I can go to court to get this amount but its not worth. Other than all the hassles, It might destroy her new wedding and I do not want to do that. After all I had treated her like a friend. I feel ashamed that I ignored all the red flags as I was always more involved in this friendship than she was.
I’m struggling with the aftermath of what I guess technically counts as ghosting, but emotionally it feels more complicated than that.
I was in a deeply intense relationship with someone I genuinely loved and was planning a future with. Earlier this year he moved to my town, we were looking at flats together, talking about building a life, and I honestly thought I’d found my second chance at love.
Then over a relatively short period of time he completely withdrew. There was huge stress in his life around work and serious family issues back home, and from what I understand he became emotionally overwhelmed and shut down. The last time I properly saw him, he told me “I just can’t deal with it” and that I had no idea what was happening with his family.
I don’t think he did this out of cruelty. I genuinely think he lacked emotional capacity and withdrew as a form of self-preservation. But the outcome for me has still been devastating.
It’s now been almost two months of no real contact. I still think about him every day. Every part of my town reminds me of him because we built a life together here so quickly. I wake up missing him, want to tell him things during the day, and still struggle to accept that someone who felt so emotionally central is suddenly absent from my life.
The hardest part is holding two truths at once:
I believe he loved me.
And he still disappeared from my life.
I’m in therapy now and trying to understand my attachment, why the relationship became so emotionally consuming for me, and how to rebuild myself without him. I’m functioning better than I was at the start, but honestly some days I still feel like I’m grieving someone who is emotionally alive in my heart but unreachable in reality.
Has anyone else experienced something similar — where someone withdrew not out of malice, but overwhelm/shutdown? And if so, did it ever get easier to carry? Did they ever contact you again?
Tbh I was not physically attracted to him nor would I see myself date him as he used to spam text me when I would not respond or try to love bomb me with messages and said he was in love with me but Sunday we had sex I stayed the night, Monday morning came we did it and we both wanted it but he ghosted me and I am so upset about it because he genuinely was okay to hangout with or talk to when bored but the physical attraction was not there because I could not get over the fact he had 12 fingers. Awful of me but I really do not understand why he ghosted me 😭😭
He is 25 and I am 30. Never again.
I’m just curious. I’ve never done it. But the sudden going great then boom next day ghosted make no sense to me. People who have ghosted someone before what was your reason?
Did you just lose interest ? Or was it something else
It's going on 6 years since I've been ghosted by this girl i really cared about from work went on our breaks together and stuff,whenever she needed help with something like gas or just encouragement i was there but when she left Walmart and completely cut me off aka ghosted me it killed me,i keep asking myself what did I do because im still confused lol I can't even text her because im hurt and mad at the same time I miss her but I don't I still struggle with this daily,oh yeah I forgot to mention that I was ghosted by my best friend once she got in a relationship,and if you call it ghosting my older sister ghosted me too,but im in the process of cutting her off let's just say i already did lol
I feel pathetic at this point. Its been almost TWO MONTHS since the guy I was dating for 9 weeks ghosted me. We met off a dating app, I thought things were great for two months, then he just started responding once a day and being too busy to ever see me. At first he told me his work schedule was just crazy, so I gave him some space and wait’s. It’s been six weeks since we’ve last hung out. I asked him to hangout three weeks ago, he said yes, then flaked on me saying it was his friends birthday and he hasn’t seen them in forever.
Last week I asked him if he wanted to hangout over the weekend. He tells me he’s not going to be home, but we can do next weekend. Then he texted me yesterday that he actually is going on an impromptu trip over the weekend. He gets one day off a week, so he’s apparently driving 8 hours to stay at the beach for one day. I flipped out on him, and said I understand im not his type and wish him the best of luck.
He then responds insisting he’s just busy, and goes “ but we can hangout Thursday? I’ll just be working *most important and stressful role that day, I’ll try to get one of my coworkers to cover that day for me”. I already know he has no intention of calling off and putting me before his career so I say i feel bad, and he doesn’t have to do that. He then thanks me for understanding and says he just has so much he wants to do and he only gets one day off per week. ITS BEEN ALMOST 7 WEEKS!
Im just enraged. Why for the love of god can this man just not say ” I’m sorry you’re just not my type and I don’t feel a connection.”?! Hes obviously not suddenly so busy that he can’t see me for 7 weeks, when he use to see me weekly. Same with texts, he use to text 16 times a day, now it’s once per day.
I have ADHD. I’ve forgotten messages longer than is considerate and I’ve had to apologize. But I refuse to ghost anybody (unless they’re unsafe of course) and simply blame it on ADHD.
So, fellow ADHDers who struggle with texting/calling: please find the tools necessary to prevent ghosting your people when life gets overwhelming.
I’m saying this because I’ve been on the receiving end of a friend who ghosted me, and prior to simply vanishing permanently, they’d blame all delayed communication on having ADHD. It was excusable to a certain degree. But ghosting ≠ ADHD
It’s okay to struggle. It’s okay to mess up. But to give up completely on communication/closure is simply inexcusable if you want to be considered a decent human being.
End of rant.
i started texting with this girl around 3 months ago, two weeks ago we first met irl on a party since she lives 2 hours away. we planned to meet on that party and she asked me if we could kiss and we ended up making out for quite some time. the next day she started sending me nudes and it all moved really fast. we texted all the time, sent vlogs she sent me freaky rells and all.. a week later i took s train to see her. that was 3 days ago we hang out for around 4 hours and when she drove me back to train station she asked me for a kiss and we made out. when she glt home she snapped me and we texted as usual we both agreed that the makeout ended too soon and that we gotta re do it. now for last two days i have been on delivered for hours even when shes online, no more tiktoks or rells, nothing… she did like and add the tiktok i posted yesterday to favs… but no texts back am i being ghosted
I (28) just met a cute guy (25) in hinge. he chased chased and chased. then we met, had a fun time vibing, dancing and kissing. he has been showing signs fear by sending a text and deleting it before I could respond - it was annoying a little but he is CUTE. Anyhoo, within two three days he confessed he still has feelings for someone else, still wanted to be friend - to which I denied. he told me he keeps thinking about the date and all but nothing emotional. I left him - just courtesy texts etc. Then he sends me some random shit at 3am and unfollows me next day. I didn't say anything. Then after 10 days, dude texts me randomly about some homestay location - no apology for the mess, no hi, nothing. I just gave him the name and left it at that. what is wrong with this man.
I wish you nothing but success.
I pray the universe keeps you protected on your journey.
May every path you take be cleared before your feet touch the ground.
May harm lose its way before it reaches you.
May hardship pass beside you instead of through you.
I release this prayer without attachment.
No pull.
No claim.
No weight.
Only frequency.
Only light moving through the field.
Only intention dissolving into the current of everything that exists.
As the edges of self soften, as ego loses its name, as consciousness expands beyond memory and form, I send this into the universe:
May you be guided.
May you be guarded.
May peace find you in every room you enter.
May success arrive without taking anything sacred from you.
May your spirit stay intact through every season meant to shape you.
I ask nothing back.
I only send protection into the infinite, and trust the universe knows where to place it.
I really liked this person we talked for 2 days the day before ghosting this person I was talking to him for 7 hours! It’s been a month now. I don’t know why i just didn’t say I’m not doing well and i cant talk to you rn. Like it’s not that fucking hard right?? But at that time I felt like everything is too much for me and I pretty much gave up on everything i have depression maybe that’s why. He reached out multiple times the last time was more than two weeks. If i do it it’s might just be apologizing for ghosting this person like that but idk if i should do it or it’s not even worth it cause we don’t know each other’s for a long time? I just feel guilty because he reached out.
I don’t even know what happened. We were seeing each other for 3 months, I thought things were going really well, even up until the point she ghosted.
We were texting up until 2am on Friday night (almost 3 weeks ago now) then I just didn’t hear from her again.
She has since been active a lot on social media and clearly posting stories to get other guy’s attention.
I miss her and want to reach out, but she has still left my messages on delivered for a couple of weeks.
I don’t know why either but it’s really hit me hard, harder than some of my past 2-3 year+ relationships ending.
I have been trying to accept it and move on but not knowing what happened is driving me crazy.
My birthday is next week, we were supposed to have plans together (that she was planning mind you), but I can’t even get her to reply anymore. She posts stories constantly, goes live on yubo/tiktok… she doesn’t seem depressed (she had ghosted once early on for 3 days due to some illness/depression) but this is something else.
i don’t like when people say “it’s not ghosting if you only went on 1-2 dates they just stopped texting you” but that’s literally what ghosting is…someone stops replying and acknowledging your existence. you can go on 0 dates and get ghosted.