u/peachie_milkie

Hi I'm about 14 months post-op for the sleeve. I'm 25F, 5'4", I started at 319lbs, lost about 110lbs total, including the pre-op diet. However, over the past few months, I have managed to regain 15lbs, which is insane because I'm not even supposed to be done with the weight loss :(. The worst part is that I can 100% feel those extra 15 lbs, and my weight keeps rising.

Admittedly, my sweets and snacking addiction has come back. It doesn't help that it seems like I can eat pretty regular portions now. I'm hungry ALL the time and I'm always craving something. My blood test came back normal, no iron or b12 deficiency, nothing.

Please help me. Any tips appreciated.

I feel so ashamed and sad. I struggle with mental health a lot and this is not helping at all.

Tracking is triggering and I don't function well-enough to be able to handle something like meal-prepping.

Hi,

I (f24) recently got into a relationship (< 3 months), and my boyfriend (m27) has been wonderful to me. Despite having a completely different mental health background (somewhat secure, more on the quiet, avoidant side) , he has been incredibly patient, loving and understanding towards me. He reassures me, he talks me through my meltdowns, and he believes in me. He puts effort into fixing anything we talk about and he truly is wonderful.

The thing is, with bpd, a lot of my triggers are related to him. Usually, it is related to me feeling like he doesn't like me, like he doesnt have fun with me, like he feels obligated to me, like he prefers other people over me, like he's mad/annoyed/frustrated by me, like I'm draining him, etc. It's really hard for me to get out of that headspace and to believe otherwise, despite all the reassurance.

Understandably, that leads to some frustration on his end. He feels like I don't trust his word. He feels like I'm always looking for negative things to focus on and that despite all of his efforts, none of them seem to be enough and we are always discussing the same issue. He said that he knows it's a mental health issue and that I'm not purposefully doing it, but he mentioned that it still hurts him. He did tell me he doesn't want to leave or give up on our relationship but he feels as though we are hitting a bit of a wall.

It broke my heart to hear that but it made sense. I know it's draining and I know I would struggle with the same feelings if I was in his position. I care about him deeply and I don't want to hurt him or burn him out, so I've been racking my brain over and over trying to find a solution before it takes too much of a toll on him.

I genuinely don't know how to navigate the balance between confiding in him, whilst at the same time avoiding hurting him and avoiding making him feel like he's not doing enough.

Please help me. I haven't been in many relationships and the ones I have been in have always been incredible triggering, bpd-wise, which I know is pretty standard.

I've been medicated and in therapy for the last 3 years, and I completed my first dbt cycle a year ago (though I am waiting for a second one).