u/pie566943_0

My 83 yo father has zero short-term memory and is dx with cognitive decline not altizmers-related. My 80 yo high-functioning mom, my brother and I are coaching him through a major and emotional financial decision.

The waffling back-and-forth is reaaaly frustrating. One hour he'll passionately align with the "right" decision (objectively right in all regards, but emotionally painful). An hour later he's just as passionately exactly opposite.

We wind up carefully repeating the very same long, protracted, detailed explanation over and over, eventually convincing him, again, to do what's right. Hours or days later we're dealing with the very same outbursts when he switches back. He's not exactly "changing his mind" - he seems to have no recollection of the last ten times we did the same dance.

Now it's getting serious, because people from outside the family are getting involved. We need their help to do what's right, but I'm worried they're going to eventually say, "Fuck this!" and walk away - which I'd completely understand.

Any tips for helping HIM remember what he decided, why, and what's next? How can we help him maintain the mindset to do what's right long enough to actually do it?

Thanks for taking a look.

HL47M married 22 years to LL45F. Stopped keeping track after a year went by. I can't think straight in public anymore. Every woman over 30, just out and about, minding her own business, sends my thoughts astray. Hair. Face. Neck. Shoulders. Back. Arms. Hands. Fingers. Waist. Ass. Legs. I swear to god sometimes I can't move. Literally frozen. All I can think about is smelling and touching and tasting her. I'm in the grocery store tonight to get dinner parts, and I can't turn a fucking corner without fantasizing about the next woman I see. I feel like I'm hanging onto a thin branch of a willow tree, leaning over the edge of a rocky cliff, staring down at a long free fall and certain sudden death, heart fluttering, stomach dropping, not sure if I should just let go or if the branch will break and send me down. I've never thought about women so much in all my life. What the fuck is wrong with me. That's a period. Not a question mark. FML.

I'll take this down if you think I should - I'm sure it's triggering.

Every single time I'm driving on S Boulder Road approaching Cherryvale I ask myself, "How the ***actual fuck*** do you make a northbound turn from S Boulder Road onto Cherryvale into the rear end of a car traveling westbound on S Boulder Road? I just don't see how it's possible to make an innocent turn that way. It angers the fuck out of me. I think the report says the turning driver was past the stop line and completing his turn as the light changed, but still. Am I missing something? It's been a year and I still can't shake the suspicion that the turning driver was trying to cut it close to be a dick. FWIW I have no relationship at all with either driver.