Hi all! I am dating and wanting to learn more about the boundaries around texting. I've been in situations in the past where it's kind of turned pen-pallly and at my age (31) that reaaaallly disturbs me... What are some ways to protect a good relationship from going down that path? And if it's in that pen pally stage, is there a way to correct it?
Thank you!
Hi! I fear that I need to make the decision to lessen grandmothers access to my older toddler. She does something for me that really feels like a gift, but I think it's causing more harm than good!
She'll do a weekly 'date night' where my son will stay the night at her house 1x a week (usually a weeknight, hardly ever weekends.. which beggar not chooser here lol) and while I enjoy having an evening to myself, but her parenting style is inconsistent, she has trouble with boundaries & implementing them, she uses shame language sometimes (it's not.. intentional, I just think it's old school... which I'm mature enough to realize how it's affected me even) - side note she also watches him 1 morning til after nap time a week while I work.
Well now that my toddler is getting older he's trying to test controlling the room & outcomes, he knows he can control the room at grandmas by acting out, screeching, running away, ignoring. Grandma bends expectations, inconsistent in them, negotiates, or turns it into a game or bribery. (I'm going leave you if you don't come on or you can have ____ if you do ____.
That it's bleeding into my household, and I just really don't like it /: it takes him a few days to regulate, and it also makes me the bad guy & I find her undermining my parenting from time to time. It's dangerous to me because most times when a boundary is placed, it's meant to be taken seriously for example: waiting for an adult to cross street with you, sometimes he'll just keep running. I think "no" and "stop" have been used so loosely in her care, that they've lost their significance.
Has anyone experienced this? I'm not really sure what I'm asking here, I think I'm grieving losing that time to myself, I feel selfish for wanting to hold onto that but I feel like I need to make this decision in an effort to help him regulate himself, respect the home & to respect me., Set consistent expectations and standards.
He does wonderfully in others care and with friends he only does these things with me and grandma mainly..