u/plumpuke

I've been on zoloft for over 3 years and just completely went off of it (with my psych). When I got on it I wasn't diagnosed with bp yet and prior to that I tried 3 different ssris that just made my depression worse. The only reason I stayed on Zoloft was because it got rid of my suicidal ideation, but otherwise made me pretty numb. I just really didn't want to go through a big medication change again because I felt like I wouldn't be able to handle it.

Now I am diagnosed, have a new psych, and am on lamictal and wellbutrin. I felt really stable for a while and the goal I had with my psych was to get off the zoloft eventually, since I have been doing well on my new meds and have been doing consistent therapy.

I am now 1 week into no zoloft (I have been weening of for a good year) and I am really depressed. I still am not suicidal for whatever reason, but I am struggling with every other depression symptom I usually have. I really really don't want to be on another ssri, they have always made me feel so horrible and coming off of them has always been the darkest time of my life.

I am not making things easier by using weed to cope with my negative thoughts and emotions. My therapy feels inconsequential and It feels like I am stuck. I don't know what to do.

Last night I had to be honest with my SO and now I feel so exposed for "faking it till you make it" for too long. I was diagnosed with bp2 about 4 years ago and before that I had just been with the diagnosis of depression, anxiety, and ADHD. I have been on a multitude of different antidepressants since I was 13 and am currently on a mix that I thought was good for me. I've been on zoloft for 6 years and once I was diagnosed I was put on lamictal.

Over the years I have worked with my psych and changed doses of both medications multiple times and over a year ago we added wellbutrin because of my low libido, anhedonia, and general lack of motivation and numbness. Overall I feel more stable and am able to keep a job and get up to go to work everyday which is something I really struggled with before. However... I have still been dealing with feeling detached and numb and the wellbutrin only really improved my anhedonia.

Because I have been "stable" and maintaning my job, my psych doesn't want to change my meds anymore. Acting like I'm a normal person and have normal emotions everyday is exhaisting but I though having a stable income and other stability in my life would make things better, but it clearly hasn't. I really didn't want to tell anyone about how I've been feeling because it's been like this for so long and I've just been lying and I really am scared of changing my psych, therapist, and medication because that is the most stressful experience and I know I wouldn't be able to work during this time.

I wish I could just completely start over with my medication but I know that's not an option. I'm also traumatized by the last time I weaned off of lexapro, which left me with debilitating side effects for over a year. I just don't know what to do.

Hi ya'll,

I (26f) am getting married in October this year and have been really struggling to be excited and happy for us. My fiancé is my best friend and I know I want to be with him the rest of my life-this I have zero doubts about. However, I have never had the healthiest view on marriage due to family issues.

My parents were both abusive to each other (my mother constantly cheated and picked fights and my dad was physically abusive) and since they got divorced my dad has remarried 4 times and none of them have gone well. My parents would always put themselves and their relationships first so I grew up with a warped view on relationships and marriage in general.

Because of this I never wanted to get married, I even told my therapist when I was 14 that I didn't believe in love and thought marriage was just for financial and social benefits. All of this on top of the rest of my family being equally as horrible makes me distressed everytime I have to see them.

My fiancé has a very traditional and loving family and has always wanted to get married and have kids, so I obviously want to make him happy by making this day special and being excited with him, but whenever I think of the day and my family being there it makes me cry. I still love my family and want them there, but they always create drama whenever they get together.

I'm not sure how to get past this and get out of my head to enjoy this process with him and his family (his mom is super excited and planning a lot of it with us). If anyone has a similar experience or advise I would appreciate it.