u/plzDontLookThere

Better question: how do I convince myself that I’m not wasting time or money?

I want to play and make music, but I have no instruments of my own (and my laptop is on the brink of death). I'm in concert band (percussion) in college (never studied music theory, it's basically a no-cut program), but its hard for us to reserve spaces just for practice because other performing arts groups who have shows/ performances get priority). And then after college, I'll have nothing.

I already feel enough guilt when I waste time. I just can't see myself dropping hundreds of dollars on something I'm not good at when money is tight. Plus, I could spend that time learning skills to help me get a job. How can people just collect shoes, travel everywhere, or buy art /metal/ woodworking supplies every week and not worry about other expenses? Money doesn't buy happiness, but it can make you comfortable. I love listening to music; I'm not obsessed in like knowing anything and everything about an artist's life and all the albums out there, I just love how the notes somehow come together perfectly in many ways. I'd love to dabble in music theory and make something of my own (with real instruments) to have something I can be proud of, but there's a huge opportunity cost that frequently clouds my enjoyment.

No, I don't go on vacations or to movie theaters or restaurants.

Edit: yes, I understand that a job is what makes you money, but you can have multiple stream of income, or make a few extra bucks by doing something you enjoy (which is what I’m getting at). You can also enjoy your job. I kinda just hate how I was put out of everything as a kid (when stuff was “free” to us), and now I have to pay to get back into things 😅

I’m on my fourth academic suspension, and somehow got that deferred again. But due to my GPA, I’ve lost my federal financial aid.

In previous terms, I’ve worked dead-end jobs, vowed that I never want to stay there, went back to school, and fucked things up again. The killing part is that I’ve been failing the classes I love the most (and the classes that would give me the best shot at decent jobs); I’ve taken some very cool classes IMHO.

I‘m going to be a senior after 5 years, I’ve switched in the individualized program so that all of my credits transfer over, and I just taking random stuff now (no higher level classes cuz I don’t meet the prerequisite).

Ever semester, I become confident that I will do well, and all that confidence disappear after week 3. I just lose the will to do anything and everything. Then it becomes impossible to catch back up. I came in as a CS major (with plenty of programming prior btw), failed, tried some pure math, failed, and am now doing some Econ and a Data Analytics cert on Coursera (I’ve barely passed the easy Econ courses).

Right now, I’m a Car Sales Intern, but I could’ve gotten the fulltime job 5 years ago, not waste years and thousands of dollars. Yes, I’m one of those people who keeps taking out loans (when I qualify) with no plan to pay them back.

I’ve been like this for years, even for most of high school. Funny enough, I can’t afford to NOT be in college cuz the aid I am getting covers my rent and other bills (bless Chapter 35). I’ve already tried the advice of stepping back, working for a bit, taking a reduced courseload, switching majors, and nothing has gotten better.

Is there any way to fix myself? Should I give up on being the kid who made the most of their education and got a respectable job after college?

Professors don’t like me, I don’t do well in their classes. I’m not a people-person: no friends, no one I look up to, if I go out to events, I don’t talk and I leave early, my family has no connections, etc. I really don’t have any skills no one else has. People say that us humans love to talk about ourselves, but there’s only so much others can say before they start asking questions about me.

But networking is important. I’m a Car Sales Intern, but my background is in CS, data analytics, and economics (I suck in all of these btw). I don’t have access to the software and programs the full time guys use, so there’s very little for me to do, and thus very little opportunity to “prove myself” to them. I love listening to them and customers talk, but there’s nothing I can contribute. I’m just observing and driving cars around :/

Is anyone else as bad at this as me, or am I the only one behind?

Hello all,

I have to be fully moved out of the Lodge by July 23, and move-in for the Marshall is not until around the 18th of August. The Marshall won't allow early move-in. Home for me is about 1500 miles away, and I will be working in Rochester.

I need a place to stay for those ~3 weeks. What have other students done?