u/prois99

Hi, I am 27M. Hope I can describe this well enough without writing too much. The thing is, I have a big problem with self confidence, it is all about my looks. Never been hurt in person, just the online lookism think screwed me up about 7 years ago and it never let go.

I am just 5 foot 8, my skeleton in general is quite thin, so my hands, wrist etc. are naturally smaller (yes muscles would help a bit), I am also blue eyed, so not the attractive dark type. Few days on r/amiuglytruth I made a post concerning whether I look to feminine, where the usual response was that I am not. I do acnkowladge that I am pretty, but that is the whole problem.

I love BDSM, but my "pretty" non dangerous face and small frame just completely prevent me from enjoying any fantasy that I could be dominant with a girl. I just feel like despite her having potentially sex with me or relationship with me, it would not be the actual "do whatever you want with me" thing. I don´t know how to describe this, for me BDSM is something about mutual trust, but for sure some sort of an animal instinct / spark must be there from the woman´s side.

Regarding the BDSM part I always felt more domintant, but in the past years I just started enjoying porn where women are dominant because I cannot imagine I could be seen as a dominant counterpart by a woman which completely cuts me off from the fantasy as I cannot relate to it, despite strongly wanting to.

What did not help is, that I had horrible behavior in high school and despite not being chased all the time by girls, I had some chances I could use, but did not. During uni covid happened, so not much sexual experience when I was young. Then I found a girlfriend with which I am now, where yes, the sex is quite a problem, which is destroying my confidence even more.

I already decided I will break up with her, however I dont know what to do from here. Since my low self esteem is originated all in my looks, what do I do? How do I am supposed to get confidence in this area? What if I find out, that actually yes, I could never be perceived as a dominant counterpart by women? I was thinking of BDSM meetups, but I am afraid that I will just get hit with the hard truth. This is not an EGO thing, just a fantasy I cannot relate to, knowing it will always be an illusion, is causing me distress.

Hello,

I am a 27 year old software engineer with 3 YOE, no university degree. Doing the job because I love CS and programming. However what is happenning within the job market is crazy. Everyday after work I study to get better at this stuff. I am doing well at my job, however all the pressure to keep getting better, due to bad market conditions, AI, etc. is starting to give me a lot of anxiety, despite the fact that I still enjoy the craft. I also have a lot of doubts about the future of this the job market for SWE.

To help me cope, I took a flooring apprenticeship on the side, which I finally completed, so now I could start in the flooring trade, and slowly start a bussiness after a learn a bit about it.

Also I am thinking of taking HVAC apprentiship, slowly moving towards the refrigiration trade.

You might be confused, however in my country it is possible to pick these up on the side, then after you work in the trade for some time you usually start your own bussiness (like a one man bussiness at the start).

Currently, I am in the stage where I might work 3 days a week as SWE, and 2 days doing flooring with someone, where I would try to catch up some SWE hours after doing the flooring.

However, what I mainly wonder, if you were to bet on one of these, which one would you choose? If I were to leave my SWE job, and keep only doing it as a hobby, I could diversify the two trades and see, but it´s super hard to say now, which of these three careers would be most stable in profitable in lets say 3 years.

Due to the market situations, I just decided to be fully pragmatic and choose whatever hass the potential to be stable and make the most money.

Any opinions here? Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Edit: My location is Czechia, Central Europe

Hello,

I am a 27 year old software engineer with 3 YOE, no university degree. Doing the job because I love CS and programming. However what is happenning within the job market is crazy. Everyday after work I study to get better at this stuff. I am doing well at my job, however all the pressure to keep getting better, due to bad market conditions, AI, etc. is starting to give me a lot of anxiety, despite the fact that I still enjoy the craft. I also have a lot of doubts about the future of this the job market for SWE.

To help me cope, I took a flooring apprenticeship on the side, which I finally completed, so now I could start in the flooring trade, and slowly start a bussiness after a learn a bit about it.

Also I am thinking of taking HVAC apprentiship, slowly moving towards the refrigiration trade.

You might be confused, however in my country it is possible to pick these up on the side, then after you work in the trade for some time you usually start your own bussiness (like a one man bussiness at the start).

Currently, I am in the stage where I might work 3 days a week as SWE, and 2 days doing flooring with someone, where I would try to catch up some SWE hours after doing the flooring.

However, what I mainly wonder, if you were to bet on one of these, which one would you choose? If I were to leave my SWE job, and keep only doing it as a hobby, I could diversify the two trades and see, but it´s super hard to say now, which of these three careers would be most stable in profitable in lets say 3 years.

Due to the market situations, I just decided to be fully pragmatic and choose whatever hass the potential to be stable and make the most money.

Any opinions here? Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Edit: My location is Czechia, Central Europe

Hello,

I know that AI wont crawl in places, tingling with parts, but what about the diagnostic part? How likely do you think it is that AI will be able to analyze the system, diagnose and step by step come up with the solution?

Hello,

I see that most design systems such as MaterialUI, or now probably even more Shadcn use composition to pass around React components (meaning for table, the items are React components, same with Dropdown and the items are also React components, in both cases simply passed as children.

However for example Ant Design seems to be more prop oriented, where even some items are also passed as React components, but as props, not children.

I see the composition is more popular, and modular, but what is your opinion on this? I feel like sometimes it tends to cluster the code with a lot of imported components, and you also sort of loose contract, because TS does not tell you what react component to insert, so you have to take a lot of time to look at docs etc.

What is your opinion on these approaches? What is your favorite?

Thanks.

Hello,

unfortunately I had to leave after the series ended. However during the stream Memb said he will talk about something with the viewership / donations and future plans. So I am just curious whether anything significant was said, whether he is planning future tournaments or maybe whether there is not enough support for them anymore?

Thank you very much.

Hello,

I am reaching out about something that has been bugging me for some time. I am a 27 year old software engineer from Central Europe and the future of the job market is something that really worries me.

I don´t wan´t to waste much lines of text with my background, but I have 3 YOE background in sales, which I did not enjoy at all, and as a hobbyist programmer I decided leave sales for a software development career, this has been 2 and a half years ago. (so yes, currently I have 2.5 YOE . Seeing the market go to hell has been quite a slap to the face, also with the constant AI hyping. I am still working really hard for it, still upskilling in my free time, building projects etc. which is on one hand fun, but from the pragmatical point not so motivational.

To make long story short, I decided to complete an apprenticeship in the flooring trade, and I am also starting an electrician one in 3 months, which I would like to lead to HVACR - refrigiration especially (doing this on the side to my full-time job).

The path I want to take is simply the one that just makes me most money. I already tried to "follow my passion" with programming, which will forever be my hobby, but for my job I just want to make as most money possible.

In my country, trades work in way that you complete your apprenticeship (pretty much school for the trade), and either go work for yourself (pretty much run a 1-3 man bussiness, which is the only way to make money), or get the experience to work for someone else, with the goal of working for yourself anyway, as working for someone does not make you enough money.

I currently have over 100k dollars in investments, which means I could live for some time with low wage, to upskill myself in another area. I chose flooring, because of the low barrier to entry, where I could start working formyself very quickly and also have it as a sort of quick money side hustle, however I would still need to probably go part-time in my main job for some time to find someone who will really teach me the trade.

What I am not sure though, which of these paths to really pursue as priority. Currently I am doing well at my SWE job, however obviously the pay is not as high as I would like and the future is super uncertain.

Once I complete my electritcian apprenticeship, I would need to work for someone for 2 years in the refrigiration (or HVACR area specifically) to be able to start working for myself, however this could be sustainable due to my savings, and potentially with some flooring side gigs.

I really don´t know what way to take now, I really love software development, but I decided that due to the market, the only thing I will look at are money and a future proof career.

Also one of things that also crossed my mind was going tu university for either mechanical or electrical engineering, but with all honesty, who knows If I would not face the exact same situation as now once finished.

What would you suggest? Thank you all in advance.

P.S. Also sorry for some potential English mistakes, as mentioned above, it is not my primary language.