Got told I was “creating a hostile work environment” because the NT new hires misinterpreted my tone
Well guys I did it. I officially have Evil Autism.
I work in a bakery. I’ve worked at this particular place for almost 4 years. I am a skilled baker with a solid understanding of specifically bread. Bread is something I’m very passionate about, and I was excited at the opportunity to train new people. I have trained over 10 bakers at this place without a hitch, most of them grew to become core members of the team and told me directly they found my training helpful in developing their skills.
Cut to new people arriving. One girl, around my age (20s,) seems friendly and competent but shy. Struggles with certain aspects of technique and building speed, but I try my best to help and teach her while making it clear that I’m not judging her for being new. Offer constructive feedback when needed, without nitpicking too much. She seems to be taking it well and is slowly improving.
Other new person is an old lady. They’ve put her on the most physically strenuous shift and she is struggling to keep up, even after a considerable amount of time has passed. Constantly needs people to help her or else she gets out an hour late and expects us to pick up her slack even when we’re busy. Manager tells me that cleaning the mixers is now everyone’s responsibility (it’s not) and cuts an entire line of product just so new hire can get out on time.
I’m not going to lie and say I’m not frustrated. I am. But I try my very hardest to come across as warm and friendly at work using my limited social skills. For a while in the bakery I didn’t have to worry about that, because the team we had allowed me to unmask. But now most of those people are gone, and I went from the best manager I’ve ever had at any job to one that doesn’t communicate, doesn’t take us seriously, and is prejudiced against me for being trans.
Today I got called into a meeting with both of my managers and the manager of the entire kitchen. They said they’ve received several pieces of feedback from the new hires that my tone with them has come across as frustrated, impatient, and not welcoming. Sigh.
I’m TRYING y’all. So fucking hard. I care so much about this job and come into work every day, bust my ass, give 110% because I love bread. I’ve been working at this place longer than most of the folks in the bakery (including both of my managers!) and every boss I’ve ever had here has given me stellar reviews. I’m a good employee, a good worker, and I get treated like garbage because I don’t understand how to speak in Just The Right Way so that people won’t think I’m mad at them. All the feedback and advice they gave me were things I’ve already been doing. I tell them it’s okay to make mistakes. I tell them I was new once. I ask them questions about their process and give them constructive criticism as well as lots of positive reinforcement. I try not to overload them with information, as much as I want to. I truly don’t understand what I’m doing wrong other than being Autistic. I also wish the new hires would have talked to me directly instead of going to the managers so I could have fixed my tone in the moment.
Not to mention one of the complaints I got was about not saying good morning back to people… which I do, but my voice is quiet so they can’t hear me. Also sorry for not being awake after dragging myself to work before the sun is up… Christ.
I’m already looking for a new job anyways due to different reasons, but this whole experience is just making me want to quit and freeball it for a little bit. I’m only sticking around because I do have a few lovely coworkers left from the original “dream team.” Working in this bakery used to be the most fun I’ve ever had at a job, and now it just sucks… :(
I know I’m a talented baker. I’m fucking good at what I do, including training. If my coworkers could just be goddamn adults about this whole situation instead of taking my words in bad faith because my tone is off we wouldn’t be here. Sigh. Wish me luck on the job search.