u/rockTheAnts

Order replacing chaos. A quiet return to comforting routine. A feeling of comfort and a desire to slow down, enjoy life, and get cozy. Those are the general vibes that I get from fall.

I know spring is associated with rebirth, but fall feels like new beginnings to me. Most of my life has been beholden to the academic calendar, so fall is heavily associated with the start of a new school year. I also grew up in the late 80s and 90s when network TV was still huge, so autumn always meant new seasons of shows. If you’re into sports, American football starts in the fall.

Fall means it’s finally cool enough to turn the oven back on and also enjoy some of my favorite recipes like soups, chilis, baked goods, and curries, that feel too heating when it’s sweltering outside. The cabin fever from avoiding the oppressive summer heat is cured and being outdoors becomes enjoyable again. I know you all feel me on that one, because this summer has been brutal! Plus, I’m an October baby, so autumn was associated with new life since day one for me.

All in all, fall hits as comforting and just the right amount of melancholy. What kinds of feelings, memories, or associations do you have with fall?

In the Northern Hemisphere, we are now closer to the fall equinox than we are to the summer solstice. Here in Colorado we've had some wetter and cooler weather and it's been amazing! Having little previews of fall like that really help me deal with the hotter temps (which are back again as of today). The one upside of hot days in August is at least the days are shorter than they were in June and July. In fact, our days here are now about the same length they were in late April. So the early morning walks with my dog are now much more pleasant and shaded, even on days when it's over 90 degrees Fahrenheit. And the sun now mercifully sets before 8 pm. Given that I live in an arid climate we get relief from the heat pretty quickly once the sun sets. And the sun being at a less direct angle also takes away some of the intensity on the hot days. In addition, my son is back in school, Costco is now carrying Octoberfest beers, and the trees are abundant with apples and acorns. It also won't be long (hopefully) before we start seeing fresh snowfall on the higher peaks. It's all setting the stage for autumn and noticing the little changes like this helps when I'm ready for summer to be over, which is generally July 5th most years.

We decided to switch to the Better Value Plan from ONE just before T-Mobile discontinued multiple legacy plans recently. I just got my bill today and noticed that it was $10 higher than expected. After examining the bill, it turned out that our T-Mobile fiber service was $10 more. This despite the fact that when we signed up the price was stated as $55/month for 5 years. I chatted with an agent and it turns out that there was a bundle discount associated with the ONE plan that apparently isn't honored with the Better Value Plan. So they ended a plan that was eligible for a bundle discount with their fiber service, essentially forcing us to pay more for no reason. The agent understood my frustration and I will supposedly be receiving the $10/month discount every month (I'll certainly be keeping a watchful eye on the bill). But this just seems like they want to get rid of customers. In my area (Boulder County, Colorado), T-Mobile has been aggressively building out fiber (using Intrepid Fiber as the contractor who does the actual work) and marketing their service like crazy. All the promotional materials include their supposed 5-year price guarantee. Why they would make such an unfathomable decision in light of all this is beyond me, but if it keeps up, Xfinity's $45/month for symmetrical Gigabit internet is looking better and better to me. Just wanted to give a heads up to anyone else who might be in the same situation as me.

Edit: minor grammar

I've been playing music for multiple decades now. I started when I was 12 as a percussionist in the school band. I then added guitar, bass guitar, and piano. I majored in music composition for my undergrad degree, but I don't work in music (I'm a software engineer). As an undergrad music major, playing music was my life as I imagine it is for all music majors. I was in concert band, a classical guitar quartet, a jazz ensemble, a church band, and I had a rock band that I played with as well. Of course I also had to practice for my guitar lessons, wrote compositions for composition lessons, and practiced piano to pass the piano proficiency exam. I really enjoyed being so immersed in playing, but of course now as a full-time employee, husband, father, homeowner, and pet parent, there is no way I could play that much.

Currently I play in a rock band with some other guys who, like me, have day jobs. They're good dudes. Nobody is an addict or asshole and they're pretty dependable and capable as musicians (at least in the rock/pop idiom). But honestly, going to weekly practice feels like a chore most weeks. I kind of have fun when playing with them sometimes, but I pretty much never look forward to rehearsal. We play a mix of cover and original tunes and I genuinely like the songs we play. But I think I feel bored and unchallenged. Not to brag, but at my level of competency on guitar at least 90% of rock songs are really simple and don't stretch me musically at all. Not that I feel like I want to play exclusively technically difficult pieces. I definitely like a variety of styles and I can appreciate playing a simple song with a good groove. All in all though, I'm finding that playing in this band is not really scratching my musical itch. And this isn't a terribly recent thing because I've been playing with these guys for years and have felt this way for a while. I'm having trouble sorting out exactly what the issue is because on paper it would seem like my current arrangement ticks all the boxes. I don't know if I'm just being anti-social/a homebody, if I'm simply bored by our repertoire, or if this is part of some embarrassingly cliché midlife crisis (I'm about the right age for that). For additional context, I do have a therapist and we discuss my relationship with music regularly, so not looking for that kind of advice.

I do also make music on my own at home, either in Logic Pro or just little tunes I come up with on piano and guitar. It was also hard to find the motivation to do that, but I feel like I've made progress in that arena (again, I see a therapist and we've discussed and ruled issues like depression). Part of me thinks that I need to explore some styles and genres that are outside my comfort zone. I'm fluent enough with scales, arpeggios, and modes that I can generally play what I hear in my head without much thought. The flip side is I also feel like my fingers are going to the same old places and playing the same old predictable licks. Anyways, if you've made it this far through my essay I appreciate your dedication. Just wanted to know if any other musicians have been through something similar and what worked for them. Some of the things I've considered are learning a new instrument or learning a completely new style on a current instrument. I've also considered that maybe right now in my life I don't want to play with any kind of ensemble at all. Maybe just be a solo musician for a bit. In any event, I appreciate any suggestions.