u/sendpepperonipizza

Hi, I've recently been looking into audiology as a prospective career, and I'm looking to hear opinions on if my background would be detrimental to me as a candidate to AuD programs.

I'm 25, and have both a bachelor's and a master's degree in music performance. I unfortunately didn't realize until halfway through my master's that music just isn't something I want to do as a career for a number of reasons (the physical demands, lack of stability, and toxic culture are the main ones). I'm currently working in food service part-time and gigging with the other part of my time, but I just don't want to do this forever. I find myself drawn to audiology in part because of my music background - I see so many people my age starting to have hearing issues just from practicing and performing. However, some of my interest is definitely practical - honestly, any career that is more financially stable than music is appealing to me at this point. I feel like I just have more of a personal interest in audiology than anything else that I've considered so far, and I like the idea of a job that helps people.

The issue is that my coursework was extremely specialized towards music since day one, so I'm missing pretty much every pre-req that a program could require. However, I've always been pretty academically gifted and feel like I could get back into the grind of science/math based learning with enough time. I guess what I'm wondering is a) is audiology worth pursuing for someone with my background and b) what are good first steps to start "catching up" with all the material/experience I might have missed while getting my music degrees? I feel like community college or online courses would be a requirement, but how do I prioritize which courses to take to get me closer to being able to apply for programs?

Thanks if you read this far. I appreciate any input.

Please be kind. This is all very raw.

I (f) have a complicated history with my gf (trans f). We've been close friends for a long time. Her ex hated me and dished out ultimatums about me. After they broke up, we got closer and eventually started a situationship. It was basically dating without the label.

At some point in the situationship we both got on dating apps. I wasn't really invested, she ended up hooking up with someone. I was jealous because I had feelings for her. We talked about it and agreed that at this point it would make more sense if we just define our relationship as dating since that's basically what it was.

At the very beginning we were poly. It was the worst two weeks of my life. The initial hookup treated her unsafely (did not use condoms or lube). She seemed to be trying to just make connections for the sake of it. So did I. We had a threesome that I ended up heavily regretting (it was terrible). She was trying to show me the "resources" on polyamory that essentially amounted to shoving my feelings down. It was obviously untenable. She eventually agreed to be monogamous because she decided that I was more important.

This has cast a shadow on our entire 1.5 year (official) relationship. In fights she constantly comes back to how we were "supposed" to be poly. She refused to drop contact with the people she met on dating apps (and one in person that seemed cool at first and then immediately started sexually harassing her). She said she felt guilty cutting them off and that the connections were important to her. I was hurt that connections formed 5 minutes ago could somehow be more meaningful than our many years of friendship. She said she's tired of "wondering if she has to feel guilty" when hanging out with other people. I just don't get it. If you have no intent to be unfaithful, then what is there to be guilty about?

I think she sees polyamory as a way to escape this guilt. I don't really think she would be okay with me seeing other peiple, but it's not something she's actually had to reckon with because I don't have feelings for other people like that. My brain isn't wired to. And I think our relationship is good with just us and I'm fine with her having friends, but she seems to think it's inevitable that she'll develop feelings for them. And that hurts so bad.

This past weekend she invited one of these "friends" to a show I was going to see with her. I stepped out of the show because I was uncomfortable with it but didn't want to say no. I was hurt by this and didn't really try to hide it. Things kind of reached a breaking point and she said she's just "tired". And said she doesn't want to lose me even if we break up. But obviously things can't be the same.

I'm still trying to have hope. I love her so much. There's no one in the world who understands me better and we have such good times together. But I'm so, so bitter about polyamory at this point. Everything about it is triggering to me. I hate feeling like I'm just not open minded enough or that my concept of love just isn't elevated enough. Why can't I just be enough for her?