u/smeagolswagger

We have a 21 month old. He has been a great sleeper his whole life. We never even had to sleep train really and many nights he’ll point to his crib and say night and bye bye when doing bed time routine.

In the past week he has suddenly become obsessive over his lovey, he has always been attached but not at this level. Constantly asking for other parent when one of us is not home.

Starting a few nights ago he will not go to sleep. Up in his crib for hours sometimes quiet sometimes not and the only way I can get him to go down is sleeping on me until he is in a deep enough sleep to put him in crib and rub his back.

He has never slept in bed with us and never even napped with us before this point.

Not really sure what is the best way to handle this. We don’t have him to become dependent on needing to fall asleep on us but we also don’t feel that it is a sleep training issue of leaving him to cry it out as he has a specific want/need/obsession.

Googling and searching brings me a lot of information on younger toddlers/babies and sleep training which we don’t think is relevant? Or it brings up a lot of general separation anxiety tips around goodbyes and space etc which we are following.

Looking for the some science backed information on how to handle separation anxiety specifically around sleep.

Edit: Not sure if that is the best flair for this.

Really enjoyed this book by Frederick Backman. We have two sons. Wondering if there is anything similar about sons or children from a mother's perspective that someone could recommend?