u/suggestrandomusernam

I don’t know who needs to hear this but,
As a child raised under puritanical standards, I somehow learned to interpret POTS symptoms as laziness/guilt/shirking my responsibilities. That pit of your stomach feeling of “oh this is going to hurt” got replaced in my mind as “I don’t want to do this because I’m a lazy bad guilty person”

As a kid i remember my parents often standing over me, telling me to do a task that required getting close to the ground or lifting something heavy. When I hesitated they jumped on the guilt train, telling me i couldn’t possibly be experiencing discomfort because I was young, when they clearly were having me complete the task because they were experiencing the same symptoms themselves.

So last night I placed the litter box on a table, created a little setup that looked intentional. And today I scooped the litter without and feelings of discomfort. No guilty pit of stomach apprehension, I didn’t have to lay down afterwards. Just completed the task and went about my day.

So anyone out there raised in an environment of self erasure, now dealing with physical symptoms: you are not imagining it, you are not a bad person, you deserve to be supported. Live your life in a way that makes you feel better and safe.

And I need to talk to someone stat! My brain is breaking! I need a real live human to anchor to! If you have any interest in AI or vibe coding and you want to hear the reaction of a regular person and not a tech bro, send me your voice call app of choice. I am going to brain dump the last 24 hrs of information onto you!

Bonus points if you’re a historian, anthropologist, sociologist, psychologist, someone we can talk about the future of AI and what it means for humanity because it is wild out there right now!!

Thanks everyone, happy Mother’s Day!💐

I need a study buddy/chore buddy to help me stay focused! Let’s voice chat and yap about anything and everything platonic while we work through the days and nights together. Sound snobs beware, my connection can be chaotic.

If you are interested and need a friend to get through the day, shoot me a message with your time zone and favorite topic for discussion 😊