u/syedmurtaza789

There was a girl lets call her Hina and a guy lets call him Adil.

During university, Hina had been in two relationships and was also in contact with several other guys. If we put morality aside for a moment, I believe she had every right to explore her options and decide who she wanted to be with. Maybe she was simply trying to figure out who would be the best partner for her.

The thing is I was one of those options too.

Hina was never officially in a relationship with me, but she was clearly interested in me. I'm not a particularly handsome guy. If I had to rate my looks honestly, I'd probably give myself a 6. So even at the time, I wondered why someone like her would be interested in me.

We talked for about a month, and during that time, she opened up to me about almost everything. We became quite close, and I genuinely felt that she was interested in me.

Then, completely out of nowhere, she disappeared.

She ghosted me and blocked me everywhere. She even stopped coming to university, so I had no way of asking her what had happened. She just vanished.

I know some people might say that I must have done something wrong or that i probably gave her a reason to block me. But honestly, I don't think I did anything wrong. As far as I know, I treated her well and did everything right.

Then, three months later, she suddenly messaged me again.

She told me that her family had found out about us and that this was the reason she had blocked me and disappeared. I honestly laughed when I heard that because I didn't believe her.

By that point, I had already started feeling like I was just being kept as an option. So when she came back, I said no to her.

There was also another reason I said no. I felt like I didn't deserve someone like her. She was extremely beautiful, and I couldn't understand why someone like her would genuinely choose someone like me. I thought maybe I had misunderstood her interest in me from the beginning.

Around four or five months later, I found out that Hina had married secretly a guy from our university.

I am not trying to judge him based on his appearance, but if i am being completely honest he isn't particularly good looking either. I'd probably rate him a 4 on a good day.

At first, I didn't think much of it. But then I found out something that completely changed the way I looked at the whole situation.

One of my friends is extremely good looking and gets a lot of attention from girls at our university. He told me that Hina had been texting him for about a year. He even showed me some of their messages.

I was shocked.

She had apparently been talking to him during the same period when she was talking to me and trying to build something with me.

My friend was also confused because Hina was now married, yet she was still texting him. So he asked her directly why she was still talking to him when she was married.

According to my friend, Hina told him something along these lines:

"The reason I married Adil is because I know he won't leave me. I'm the prize. He has to win me every day and earn me every day. If I had married someone like you, I would never be able to control him because I would always be afraid that he could leave me." (Not exactly her words but something like this)

That statement completely messed with my head.

Apparently her husband knows that she is still in contact with several other guys and has allowed it. Hina has told him that they are just friends.

And now i am left wondering what actually happened.

I thought that when Hina showed interest in me, she genuinely liked me. For the first time, I felt like someone had actually chosen me. I allowed myself to believe that maybe someone could genuinely be attracted to me and want to be with me.

But now I keep thinking about everything that happened.

Was she actually interested in me, or was I simply one of several options she was considering?

Was I someone she genuinely wanted, or was I just someone she knew would always be there?

And most importantly was I ever really a person she chose, or was I just a pawn in a game I didn't even know I was playing?

Maybe I'm looking at the situation completely wrong. Maybe there are things I don't know. I understand that I'm only hearing one side of the story.

But knowing everything I know now, I can't help but ask myself

What did I actually mean to her?

I have a pretty decent voice, and deep down, I’ve always wanted to become a singer. I can’t fully pursue that dream because, where I’m from, people consider it an unethical way of earning money. I’m immune to those kinds of statements, but I still care about my family and my father’s reputation. I know he’d have to hear things from our relatives like, “Your son is a singer". I know it's gonna be embarrassing for him.

I’ve tried posting on Instagram too but I get anxious about the reactions I might receive. I keep thinking. What if people start making fun of me on social media?

I have too much on my mind, and I’m basically stuck. I’ve spent the last six years undecided about whether I should go for it in full force or not. I have absolutely no one in my circle who’s interested in music. I have a lot of knowledge about guitar, but I can’t even get one because I keep thinking, “Kahan rakhunga?” I should have learned how to play guitar by now, but I never did.

I’ll turn 34 in the blink of an eye and look back, regretting why I didn’t just do it. I already know I’ll regret holding myself back, but I’m also tired of worrying about what “char log” will say.

My BPPV started on June 3rd. I was experiencing vertigo with a strong spinning sensation, and after looking into my symptoms on ChatGPT, I found out that it could be BPPV.

I did the Epley maneuver, and thankfully, the spinning sensation completely disappeared. However, I still felt like something was off. I felt unbalanced and generally not quite normal.

At that point, the main thing I could do was focus on vestibular exercises. I started doing exercises where I would look at my thumb while keeping one foot in front of the other and slowly move my head from left to right for one or two minutes. I also used to stand with one foot in front of the other, close my eyes, and move my head from left to right. These exercises helped me a lot with my balance and recovery.

I also came across information suggesting that vitamin D and K2 deficiency might play a role, so I started taking those supplements as well.

My recovery wasn't instant. It gradually improved day by day. Then, around one and a half months later, I realized that the symptoms had basically completely gone away.

Honestly, I had almost lost hope because I kept reading Reddit threads and stories from people saying that their residual dizziness lasted for months or even stayed permanently. That really made me anxious about whether I would ever feel normal again.

But my experience was completely different. I recovered Alhamdulillah.

I think it's important to remember that the stories you see online can sometimes give you a very distorted idea of how common certain outcomes are. People who are still struggling are much more likely to post about it and look for help, while people who recover and move on usually don't come back to update everyone.

So if you're currently dealing with residual dizziness after BPPV, don't automatically assume that you're going to have it forever. Recovery can happen gradually, and everyone's timeline is different.

I'm sharing this because I remember how hopeless I felt reading those stories, and I hope someone else going through the same thing finds this and feels a little more hopeful.

You can recover. Don't lose hope.