Wife Snapchat cheating multiple times
My wife and I have been together for 12 years and have two children, a farm and a newly built house.
I was going through some PTSD and drinking too much and according to her I wasn’t giving her the attention she needs but we were working on it. During that same time, Back in January I learned that her best friend on Snapchat was a guy she used to hook up with years ago. She claimed mild flirting and we worked through it. Doing that instead of trying to help me with PTSD.
In February I found another snap chat best friend (we’ll call him bob). He was a guy she hooked up with multiple times in college while she had a long term boyfriend she was cheating on. Again, she claims flirting and we worked through it. Not long after that she got drunk and mean and started telling me she has another guy lined up since I was such a ‘dick.’ It was bob.
In May I, for the first time in my life, checked her phone and saw that in February during the time she said she said she had another guy lined up, a message was accidentally saved from her to bob and it said ‘you can come sleep over here with me (in our house) because my husband won’t be home till tomorrow night.’ I verified the date and I was in fact not working that night so it was a message sent while I was around.
At this point she still has not deleted either guy from Snapchat even though I asked her to. She said I can’t delete bob because we both work at the same business (he’s a regional manager so she doesn’t see him in her store but maybe once a month) she can’t delete him from snap bc they work together and talk business. I told her that can be handled over text message.
She deleted the first guy and a week later I learned she re-added him. And Bob is still her best friend on snap at this time.
One night she got drunk after a friends bday party, turned off her location, took my truck and starting driving to Springfield to see some college friends. Well she lied about that too bc last week I found out she was driving there to see bob but she never made it bc he refused to tell her where he lived because he knew she was married.
I’ve begged her to tell me EVERYTHING and she claims she told me it all but I keep finding something new every week.
We had a long talk and she deleted them officially off snap. She said the only time I text bob is for work. So I asked to look at her phone. Both still deleted on snap but I learned she had permanently deleted messages with bob so I couldn’t see them. She said they were work related and she only deleted them because she knew I’d be upset seeing his messages on her phone. I told her if they were purely work related then why would I care?
I have separated from her the last week and now she’s begging me to stay. She also has never worked on anything I’ve asked her to over the last year, not just the snap stuff. She hasn’t done it so she asked me yesterday ‘is it too late for me to start working on those things now.’ And she hates my parents.
Dudes we are financially well off, two beautiful kids, we were absolute best friends until this. It’s hard to fathom divorce but I know at this point with all the lies I’ll never be able to get over it. Help me out please.