u/uglyandIknowit1234

Everyone says “you deserve better” because LO is unavailable and will never choose me. However, it is also the unavailability that is attractive to me. So when people say that they mean: “I think you deserve what i consider best for you, that‘s actually what you feel like is the worst, but whatever”. It just feels so much better to me to be in love with someone unavailable than to have one date with someone available, straightforward and desperate, which apparently i find incredibly boring and unbearable. To the point i am thinking that it is some kind of “fetish” that i cannot get over anymore. With my LO’s there was some thrill and excitement at least, which made me feel more alive for once. Don’t get me wrong, if this LO would turn out to be single and choose me it would still be a dream come true, but that is because there was so much uncertainity that i had the chance to fall in love at least. Does anyone feel the same? the only one here i had a conversation with who felt the exact same of course ghosted me with a lame excuse.

Because of the love psychiatrists have for prescribing antipsychotics and the hatred they have for prescribing stimulants . it seems like they want everyone to have the lowest dopamine possible. Maybe that is too simplistic of me but i think that even when “low dopamine = bad high dopamine = good” is too simplistic, you cannot deny that most people on antipsychotics deteriorate in their functioning and a lot more people on ADHD meds thrive even though these don’t work for everyone and some deteriorate as well. My feeling is that if someone has low dopamine their quality of life greatly decreases.

most people in society hate the idea of enhancing dopamine. I feel like this is because succesful people have high dopamine naturally.

Sam-e and uridine are the only effective supplements to increase mood for me (besides ALCAR that greatly increased mental clarity/alertness/energy but it can cause fish odor even in people without TMAU, and q10 with b1 was a little bit effective but stopped working entirely). However i tried sam-e during lockdown and only tried a small sample of uridine. So i was curious about side effects of taking this in high doses and for a longer period.

Sam-e is methionine so i wonder if it affected body odor for anyone? Some also say its dangerous so are there any other side effects? For those who noticed a very positive result from sam-e as well, are there any other supplements that came close for you? For example creatine, methylfolate and b12 can in theory increase sam-e. But i never noticed that .

And for uridine has anyone taking it long term because it is said to cause cancer? And is food effective in raising it likr alcohol free wheat beer and tomatoes and walnuts?

Usually, it’s the clients that are blamed for laziness: wanting “an easy feel good pill”, “not wanting to do the work” etc etc. But can we talk about psychiatrists (“medical lunatics”) for once? They are lazy in another way that no one usually cares about: intellectual laziness. They went to school for several years. One wonders what it is for. When they see a client, no matter their problem, they only have a very limited range of options (there are lots of psychiatric medications but a lot are too dangerous, others are too expensive, or just me too drugs so in practice they just can stick to what they know). Usually a random SSRI is thrown at the client, then an anyipsychotic or mood stabilizer, if the client believes they have ADHD and the medical lunatic has no energy to coerce them into taking an antidepressant or antipsychotic instead, then a stimulant.

There is no regard for side effects let alone minimizing them. The judgement is already made in the first appointment. They do not care about proof of any kind. They are just following the standard protocols that have the least risk of them being sued. Psychopharmacology is not about discovering the cause of psychiatric illness. That is known by everyone in this sub so nothing new, but what still surprised me was that ALL psychiatric medication have severe, disabling side effects, are randomly used for any disorder in a “idk, can’t hurt to try” manner (Dodo effect) and in the rare instance a medical lunatic feels like he/she has to think, then it is usually along the lines of “which poison is the least deadly”? And they do not question that, at all. They couldn’t care less about the cause of psychiatric illness. And this is all supported by society, which is the most frightening thing to me.

There is a severe lack of curiosity about the real cause of psychiatric problems. No one cares. No one cares about any research in that direction. I get it, it doesn’t have results yet (as far as i know, since i was forced to be intellectually lazy in that regard too lately) but no one cares about the theories or steps made into that direction whatsoever either. That is why intellectual laziness in medical lunatics is not only supported, but ENCOURAGED and mandatory. They don’t care and are not supposed to question what we already know and don’t know. They want the questioning to end with the DSM, which is just a description but they sell it as an explanation and everyone buys it eagerly.
Now i know the DSM gets criticized every year. But it’s still there and thr ideology is still here to stay. So the criticism doesn’t mean anything. I also don’t think the DsM is wrong by default butvthe way it is used (as a way to stop any questioning).

Anyone else who is in the same situation of not even knowing what their LO finds attractive? I do not even know what gender my LO is attracted to. I think if i knew this i knew whether my fantasy of reciprocated attraction is even possible in theory. Not knowing is the hardest part imo. They never mention their partner or show photos of them and then again, maybe their partner isn’t even their (only) type.

You look up some information about neuroscience, maybe ask AI some questions about the things you are struggling with and finally get some longer answers. You think: “Wow! These people know a lot about the human brain! Maybe all hope is not lost after all? They are so advanced. They know what causes every negative state of the mind and they acknowledge low mood and cognitive problems/lack of functioning are real problems to be treated. Awesome! I should try to get some help for it again.”

Psychiatrist: “Do you want the medication that causes depression, weight gain, heart problems, cognitive decline and fatigue?”

“Or do you prefer the one that causes weight gain, akathisia, heart problems, memory problems, dizziness, risk of stroke, dangerous food interactions, sleepiness, and loss of pleasure/feelings of reward?”

“Or maybe the one that is the best match for you is the one that causes diabetes, weight gain, sleepiness, irritability, nausea, hair loss, greater change at allergic reactions, chance of fatal syndromes, tics, social withdrawal and suicidal ideation!”

I wonder if this has anything to do with the negative experiences due to being ugly. This has been going on for decades now. I only seem to fall in love with people who are in a totally different “league” for lack of a better word.

They are the kind of people who either were attractive and popular from the beginning or had a major glowup at some point in their life.

They know they are attractive and love validation so much that they will flirt with anyone, even people considered ugly like me.

Lately, every time i have a “LO” (if you do not know what this is, it’s a term from the limerence sub) it’s someone who is unavailable because they already have a relationship, considered way more attractive.

Everyone of course tells me to fall in love with someone more like me, and i understand, but i don’t think i’ll ever be able to. I used to be in love with people who also complained about being unwanted, but in the end they weren’t unwanted after all and they themselves didn’t want me so now i moved on.

Only the life of such a “perfect” person that i mentioned is something i am curious enough about right now, only their useless teasing is what gives me any sort of pleasure in my usually boring daily life. I cannot see myself having a normal relationship at all.

Lately i wonder if this is tied to some deep rooted issues related to the “ugly experience”, such as classmates being mean and power imbalance. Maybe i have come to see that as the ultimate kind of attractiveness to process these kind of experiences. Wanting some kind of compensation but at the same time having started to like fake attention and rejection from people i’m attracted to because that kind of interaction is the best i can get since falling in love with someone truly attainable doesn’t seem possible. It is so much harder for ugly people to be attracted to their “equal” that others consider suitable for them and vice versa. When the other ugly person isn’t attracted to/in love with you, you cannot get easily attracted to their personality either. It’s just misery. Can anyone relate?