AITA for calling out my sister's behavior
My sister Beth and I are three years apart and both are pregnant having due dates only a couple months apart. Beth 35f and me 32f. Beth has a problem with going for the jugular and then acting like she's done nothing wrong.
Our older sister Ashley, 40f, she even excluded in a text on the family group chat on mother's day. Beth told our mom and myself happy mother's day but when I included Ashley she didn't even acknowledge her mistake.
Beth is about 7 weeks along in her pregnancy and Ashley told her to wait to tell her 4 year old about in case she had a miscarriage stating that she herself, Ashley, had one and wouldn't wish it on anyone. Beth then did a reaction to that text of laughing. I waited to see if she would change it or apologize for the misclick but none came. Ashley called me crying after leaving the group and I saw red. I don't like people being disrespectful and this was the second time Beth has done so in a week.
I will be transparent and state that my message was harsh and could've been said in a different manner. In a nutshell I told Beth that it had better have been a misclick or that was a b*tch move to do to our sister and not to blame pregnancy hormones because she isn't the only one pregnant. It took some time but she responded and it was nuclear. Beth told me that I needed to watch myself and to not come at her like that again. Stating that she's been pregnant before and she doesn't need advice on when to tell him.
She went on and said if me and Ashley wanted to be b*tches than we can do it together uninviting both of us from her shower. She continued asking if this is how me and my husband fight. When our mom chimed in she apologized for my message. I left the group after that and blocked her shortly after. Before I blocked her she texted me directly saying that she wasn't going to help with our niece that lives with our mom who is currently out of town and that me and Ashley need to figure it out.
I blocked her right after that. I did so because I knew that wasn't going to be the last message she sent and she would continue to antagonize me trying to get a response. I then called our mom apologizing but also told her I was no longer speaking to Beth and that I would not be attending Christmas this year if she was present. Ashley told her the same thing. I went on saying that this was the straw that broke the camels back and she's been doing this for long enough without anyone confronting her. My mom didn't pick sides but told me it was my decision even if she didn't agree with it. I also told her that Beth had removed both me and my husband from Facebook sealing the deal.
Beth then messaged in a group chat with only us three in it. Because she was blocked by me Ashley sent me a screenshot of it.
Her message was this:
Pregnancy symptoms I expected: nausea and fatigue.
Pregnancy symptoms I didn't expect: surviving my sisters.The fact that you genuinely thought I would purposely laugh at something involving miscarriages is honestly crazy and really hurtful. I would never joke about something like that.
Next time maybe ask me directly before launching a full crime investigation and leaving the group chat. especially with mom in the group chat. One of the main reasons I even keep trying with all of this is because Mom has always wanted peace between us, especially since everything she's gone through with cancer. I'm sorry that that button was clicked Ashley. I could see how that would be more than offensive but please don't go to instant nuclear bombs next time. Just fcking ask me you hes Jesus Christ. I maybe a b*tch but I'm not heartless.
I sent the screenshot to our mother saying if she would not take accountability and apologize then I don't need that type of energy in my life or my children's lives. I also said that if she had apologized stating it was a misclick at the time then I would've done the same for my message and the tone of it. But she didn't and still doesn't see a problem with what she said. I theorize that my mom then talked to Beth because the next message that she sent was to another group chat this one included our mom.
This was her message:
Hey Mom, Sky, and Ashley, I've been thinking, and I realize I've been pretty hypocritical lately. I complain about getting hit with attitude, but the moment I'm upset, I've been doing the same thing back. I'm sorry for that. I've taken today to reflect, and I really wish I'd just paused before reacting. Honestly, I'm feeling exhausted, and being pregnant has left me on edge. But I don't think it's pregnancy hormones..more like classic Beth hormones! I've been acting like the old me lately, and I don't want to do that. I'm sorry for being sh*tty.
This is were I might be the ahole. Because her apology wasn't directed at me but to all three of us I don't take it. I still feel like it's a copout of an apology. She hasn't added my husband or I on Facebook either which just makes me feel like she is doing this to cover her own a** not because she actually feels sorry for her behavior. Idk AITA?