how to start all over again
⁍ there are moments in life when everything feels scattered. you just stop everything. you abandoned your goals.
⁍ your routines collapsed. the discipline you once had disappeared completely, and now you are standing before the ruins of what you once built.
make this duʿāʾ
اللَّهُمَّ رَحْمَتَكَ أَرْجُو فَلاَ تَكِلْنِي إِلَى نَفْسِي طَرْفَةَ عَيْنٍ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي شأْنِي كُلَّهُ لاَ إِلَهَ إِلاَّ أَنْت
"oh Allāh, it is Your mercy that i hope for, so do not leave me to myself even for the blink of an eye, and rectify all of my affairs for me*. there is no deity worthy of worship except You."*
— sunan abī dāwūd 5071
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sufyan reported: ʿumar ibn al-khaṭṭāb رضي الله عنه said,
“i do not care if i wake up to what i like or dislike, for i do not know if goodness is found in what i like or dislike.”
— ḥilyat al-awliyāʾ 7/271
⁍ the first thing you must understand is this. starting over is not shameful. remaining broken while refusing to rebuild is what destroys people. turn back to Allāh سبحانه وتعالى
al-nuʾman ibn bashir رضي* الله *عنه reported: the Messenger of Allāh ﷺ said,
“Allāh is more intensely joyful by the repentance of His servant than a man who sets out on a journey with his provisions upon his camel. then, he marched until he reached a waterless desert and was overtaken by sleepiness. he descended to lie under a tree, but his camel ran away as he slept. when he woke up, he ran to the nearest hill but did not see anything, then he ran to another hill but did see anything, then he ran to a third hill but did not see anything, so he returned to his original place. while he was sitting, his camel came walking back until it placed his rein in his hand. thus, Allāh is more intensely joyful by the repentance of the servant than this man who finds his camel in this situation.”
— ṣaḥīḥ muslim 2745
⁍ do not waste time crying over how far you fell. accept it. face it honestly. yes, you became inconsistent. yes, you lost momentum. yes, you neglected important things. but now you have a choice. stay there or rise again.
abu hurayrah رضي الله عنه reported: the messenger of Allāh ﷺ said,
“the strong believer is more beloved to Allāh than the weak believer, but there is goodness in both of them. be eager for what benefits you, seek help from Allāh, and do not be frustrated. if something befalls you, then do not say: if only I had done something else! rather say: Allāh has decreed what He wills. verily, the phrase ‘if only’ opens the way for the work of shayṭān.”
— ṣaḥīḥ muslim 2664
⁍ the mistake many people make when restarting is trying to rebuild everything at once. they return with extreme plans, unrealistic schedules, and heavy expectations. then after a few days, they collapse again.
ʿabdullāh ibn ʿamr ibn al-ʿāṣ رضي الله عنه reported: the prophet ﷺ said,
“verily, every deed has enthusiasm, and every enthusiasm has a time-limit. whoever is enthusiastic for my sunnah has succeeded, but whoever is enthusiastic for something else has been ruined.”
— ṣaḥīḥ ibn ḥibbān 11
⁍ start small, but start seriously.
abu hurayrah رضي الله عنه reported: the messenger of Allāh ﷺ said,
“verily, the religion is easy and no one burdens himself in religion but that it overwhelms him. follow the right course, seek closeness to Allāh, give glad tidings, and seek help for worship in the morning and evening and a part of the night.”
*— ṣaḥīḥ al-*bukhārī 39
⁍ return to the fundamentals. fix your sleep. clean your environment. organize your time. rebuild simple disciplines first. wake up on time. pray properly. seek knowledge even if it is a small portion consistently. read Qurʾān even if it is only one page or a few ayāt.
ʿumar ibn al-khaṭṭāb رضي الله عنه said,
“hold yourselves accountable before you are held accountable and evaluate yourselves before you are evaluated, for the reckoning will be easier upon you tomorrow if you hold yourselves accountable today.”
— muḥāsabat al-nafs li-ibn abī dunyā 2
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ʿaʾisha رضي الله عنه reported: the messenger of Allāh ﷺ said,
“oh people, you must only perform deeds you are capable of doing. by Allāh, Allāh will not give up on you unless you give up. verily, the most beloved deeds to Allāh are those performed regularly, even if they are few.”
ʿaʾisha رضي الله عنه said, “when the household of muhammad ﷺ committed to a deed, they would be determined in it.”
*— ṣaḥīḥ *al-bukhārī 43, ṣaḥīḥ muslim 782
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ʿabdullah ibn masʾūd, رضي الله عنه said,
"indeed, i hate to see a man idle, not working for his worldly life, nor working for his hereafter."
— al-fawaʾid | pg.214
⁍ do not focus on speed. focus on stability.
⁍ another important thing is to remove the guilt that paralyzes you. learn from your past without becoming chained to it. constant self hatred does not rebuild a person. honest effort does.
increase in making this duʿāʾ
anas رضي الله عنه reported: the messenger of Allāh ﷺ would often say,
يَا مُقَلِّبَ الْقُلُوبِ ثَبِّتْ قَلْبِي عَلَى دِينِكَ
“O Turner of the hearts, keep my heart firm upon Your religion!”
⁍ and understand this deeply. starting again will feel uncomfortable. your mind will resist structure because it became used to disorder. push through that resistance. the beginning is always the hardest part.
⁍ most importantly, reconnect your heart to Allāh. ask Him sincerely to help you rebuild. because no real transformation happens without his aid.
abu dharr رضي الله عنه reported: the messenger of Allāh ﷺ said,
“Allāh Almighty says: whoever comes with a good deed will have the reward of ten like it and even more. whoever comes with an evil deed will be recompensed for one evil deed like it or he will be forgiven. whoever draws close to Me by the length of a hand, I will draw close to him by the length of an arm. whoever draws close to Me the by length of an arm, I will draw close to him by the length of a fathom. whoever comes to Me walking, I will come to him running. whoever meets Me with enough sins to fill the earth, not associating any partners with Me, I will meet him with as much forgiveness.”
— ṣaḥīḥ muslim 2687
⁍ the beautiful thing about life is that as long as you are breathing, the opportunity to begin again still exists.
ʿabdullah ibn masʾūd, رضي الله عنه said,
“verily, the believer views his sins as if he were sitting under a mountain, fearing it will fall upon him. the wicked views his sins as if they were a fly passing over his nose.”
— ṣaḥīḥ al-bukhārī 5949
⁍ your life is too short to be spent at war with yourself. so accept yourself, and then strive
for self-growth for His sake.
۞* قُلْ يَـٰعِبَادِىَ ٱلَّذِينَ* أَسْرَفُوا۟ عَلَىٰٓ أَنفُسِهِمْ لَا تَقْنَطُوا۟ مِن رَّحْمَةِ ٱللَّهِ ۚ *إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يَغْفِرُ ٱلذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًا ۚ إِنَّهُۥ هُوَ ٱلْغَفُورُ ٱلرَّحِيمُ ٥٣
say, "oh my servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allāh. indeed, Allāh forgives all sins. indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful."
— surah az zūmar, ayah 39
⁍ so stand up. clean the dust off your soul. return to your Qurʾān. return to your discipline. return to your purpose.
لَهُۥ مُعَقِّبَـٰتٌۭ مِّنۢ بَيْنِ يَدَيْهِ وَمِنْ خَلْفِهِۦ يَحْفَظُونَهُۥ مِنْ أَمْرِ ٱللَّهِ ۗ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ لَا يُغَيِّرُ مَا بِقَوْمٍ حَتَّىٰ يُغَيِّرُوا۟ مَا بِأَنفُسِهِمْ ۗ وَإِذَآ أَرَادَ ٱللَّهُ بِقَوْمٍۢ سُوٓءًۭا فَلَا مَرَدَّ لَهُۥ ۚ وَمَا لَهُمْ مِّن دُونِهِۦ مِن وَالٍ ١١
for each one there are successive angels before and behind, protecting them by Allāh’s command. Indeed, Allāh would never change a people’s state ˹of favour˺ until they change their own state ˹of faith˺****. and if it is Allāh’s Will to torment a people, it can never be averted, nor can they find a protector other than Him.
— surah ar-raʾd, ayah 11
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ʿanas ibn malik رضي* الله *عنه reported: the messenger of Allāh ﷺ said,
“good works done for people protect those who did them from evil fates, harm, and destruction. the people of goodness in the world will be the people of goodness in the hereafter.”
— shuʾab al-ʿimān 7704
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ʿalqamah رحمه الله reported: ʿabdullah ibn masʾūd, رضي الله عنه said,
“do not scatter the Qurʾān as if it were dates falling from a tree, nor recite quickly as if it were poetry. stop at its verses that amaze you and let it move your hearts. let not your concern be reaching the end of the surah.”
— akhlāq ḥamalat al-Qurʾān
⁍ and this time, build yourself stronger than before.