u/whaughifl

The street won. Well it was technically a gravel road/path and not a street but I lost to it badly.

Kept falling on it over and over and over as I was trying to walk back home completely shitfaced and now I look like I was on the losing end of a UFC fight. Absolutely covered head to toe in nasty scrapes over almost every body part somehow lmao. I'm in disbelief that I woke up with my phone next to me and it wasn't broken, and that I made it to a bed at all.

Chairs fuckers, hope you had a decent night

I've had bad agoraphobia for a while related to being trapped in places and situations. Stuck in a long line at a store, rooms with closed doors, situations where it's very quiet and someone is giving a talk and I can't escape. Even Zoom/Teams calls that I can't leave without people noticing.

Now it's like this bizarre fear that I can't leave my own body and need to continue this life until I die and have no choice but to go on with it.

I'm not sure this is even the right place for this but really connected with a few posts in this sub about how agoraphobia is actually about feeling trapped and I'm not sure where else to go with this.

No idea what I'm even looking for by posting, but stay safe everyone and best of luck dealing with this human experience 🤪🥴

Thankfully it was a virtual interview so nobody could smell me at least. Poor guy probably had no idea what was coming for him because I Googled his name and found his band and started referencing their song names during the interview?

I watched too much Hot Ones I think and thought it was cool to like reference random shit from someone's life to show you know niche stuff about them but I'm sure it was super weird and creepy here.

Anyway he was chill and I decided to have the company give him an offer but I'm sure he already hates me. I am a terrible manager btw

Imagine only having 365 days a year to do shit when I have 730 days. Haters can't keep up with me. I cranked out so much gardening and yard work earlier and then crashed and now I'm going to focus on indoor activities and then watch SPORTS

I'm not a huge small-talk person but of course I'm at least going to chat a little with the friendly clerk I like at the liquor store where I'm a regular.

Haha hey what's up dude, nice weather today! Sports team won last night! Yeah man I'm having a good week. Have a great night! Go sports!

Meanwhile this is the 3rd fucking handle of vodka I've bought in the past 5 days and I'm actively destroying myself in front of this poor man's eyes with the poison he is selling to me.

Obviously it's not his fault but it's just such an insane transaction.

Anyway, chairs fuckers, take your B vitamins and electrolytes!

I have always had a very vivid dream life even after drinking a liter of vodka a day, like living in an entirely different world for days at a time each night before waking up in the morning

Now my dream person is retarded?? And like can barely communicate or talk at all and it's consistent every night for at least a month

It's pretty fucked because I wake up super deflated each morning because I can't even do shit with other dream characters now, it's just a stressful experience of being locked in a human body but can't really do anything or talk to anyone

In the past I would at least go on adventures and get attacked by bears or whatever and wake up shaking and soaked in sweat coming out of sleep paralysis but this is somehow worse??

Am I cooked? Slamming super B complex vitamins lately but idk this feels bad

I'm 35 years old and I don't understand how it seems like I'm the only one with this problem in my daily life.

I realize I hide it myself but it feels like I am the only person I have ever known who drinks a fucking liter+ of vodka a day??

I live in a "drinking city" too so it's not like I'm absorbed in some kind of prohibition culture.

Are there people I interact with daily that are actually half in the bag all the time and I don't know it? Or am I truly alone in this?

I feel like I'm the one person in all social situations that's completely retarded because of the booze and am baffled that there is nobody else I can relate to 🥴