Romance scam?
Hi all, I'm not Filipino, and I think this is the closest subreddit I can find? I've been dating this Filipina for 4 months tomorrow, and known her for 8 months. It's quite a long story so I'll just pick some points. Basically I met her on Sugarbook (yes yes, I know, not a good place to find a girlfriend, not intentional either). And for 4 months, I've never met her but I gave her money for content. Then she fell in a coma due to hypoglycemia, for nearly a month. Her best friend apparently has all her logins so for a month, her best friend has been talking to me while she was in a coma.
I have video chat with my girlfriend once up till then, and talked on the phone once. Because she said she was busy, and I've never video chat with her friend before. Or even voice chat. Long story short, her friend fed me stories that made me fell in love with her, and she showed me a note on my girlfriend's phone when she was in a coma that basically confessed how she felt. Her best friend and I had an argument because I said it felt like a scam. And she stopped talking to me because she had to go to Hong Kong in a few days. Miraculously, my girlfriend woke up and I asked her to be my girlfriend.
Fast forward to today, we've been arguing because I said she was scamming me because she sent me a photo of her best friend shopping in Vietnam, but the store in the photo does not exist outside of the US. I've been paying for her loan and tuition, and then her mom's loan, and then suddenly her younger step bother's ipad is broken and needs to pay for school last year and this year.
Say what you want, I admit I am stupid. I did
- See her in May for 1 day despite being in the Philippines for 3 days.
- I investigated (shall not say how in case she's here) and found she's not where she said she was at the day she sent photos
- When she sends proof, it's generic, eg a school bill, but without her name shown
- I did contact the hospital she was at and the hospital replied there was no such patient, at the time she was in a coma. Her best friend said she could only take a picture of her through the door. Though using AI and common sense, it doesn't make sense to put an ICU patient in a coma in a room without windows.
- She said her iphone 15 is at 60+ % health, which doesn't make sense considering the age, I've seen proof if iphone 17 pro/max which is obvious because it's the only iphone with that design
- She tells me her natural hair color is a very bright brown, almost blonde
- She tried to ask me to help her friend buy a Ford Fiesta from her friend so he can have money for his mom's cancer. But every proof I've seen of her from 2023 till today, is the same white Ford Fiesta which is quite obvious.
So now I'm trying to break up with her, it's difficult because she's constantly trying to guilt trip me. But I am tired and I am broke. And I've been single for 19 years since my ex so it's a very vulnerable spot for me. I keep wanting to believe her, but I notice lies all the lies.
I'm not asking if she is scamming, at this point, it's pretty much confirmed and I guess... I just want to talk it out to help with me moving on. I'm having depression partly from this (waiting to see someone for it). And also want to figure out why someone who's well off, with a boyfriend, wants to lie and come up with all this BS, like.... To what end?
Also, she goes to school everyday from 7am+ to 9pm+, Monday to Saturday, at a private university. And even on public holidays, I didn't question much because I'm not familiar with the Philippines, but now thinking about it, it doesn't make sense of course. And she said the school only accepts cash.
I'm trying to verify with the school if they accept credit card payment. And classes today are online due to some protest, but she told me she was going to school. No way as a Filipina living and studying there, would she be unaware of the protest.
But yea, in summary, my question is... Why would a girl who's relatively well off, has a boyfriend, want to pull of a romance scam? I was respect of her when I visited her, but what if someone she's trying to scam was someone who took no for an answer? Why would she risk rape for whatever possible reason?
P.S, there are more details, I'm keeping in vague deliberately