r/Romancescam

Posting this because I genuinely hope it prevents another woman from getting caught up in the same situation.
I matched with a man on Tinder who introduced himself as Freedom, and also used the name Freedom Malcolm. He presented himself as a U.S. military service member currently deployed overseas.

And I want to make something very clear: this was NOT an obvious fake profile.
We communicated regularly. He video-called me. During a video call, he appeared in military uniform with military helicopters visible in the background. He sent additional photographs, communicated consistently, talked extensively about faith and relationships, prayed with/for me, and discussed a future together.
There was also an entire online presence that initially seemed to support his story.

He had a social media account that appeared established, with followers and content involving cars. He portrayed himself as being involved in the automobile business and talked about owning land/property in North Carolina. He also showed documentation that appeared to be some type of automobile dealer license/certification or credential.

Taken together — the social media presence, followers, car-related content, documentation, video calls, military uniform and the personal details he shared — there were multiple things that initially made the identity seem credible.
Eventually, however, the story took a very familiar scam turn.

He began talking about a supposed shipment of approximately 55 cars that was coming into the UK. He claimed the shipment required more than $100,000 in clearance fees. According to him, he had plenty of money to cover everything — he simply couldn’t access his bank account because of his deployment.

Then an urgent situation developed where he supposedly needed permission from his commander to travel to Turkey to deal with the shipment.

His mother was supposedly going to send him the money he needed to get there.
Then suddenly he couldn’t reach his mother.
Then his mother was suddenly very sick.

And Bitcoin/cryptocurrency entered the conversation as a potential way to transfer money.
🚩 Military deployment
🚩 Can’t access his own money
🚩 Urgent financial emergency
🚩 International shipment of approximately 55 cars
🚩 More than $100K supposedly tied up in clearance fees
🚩 Needs to travel to Turkey immediately
🚩 Mother who was supposed to help suddenly unavailable/sick
🚩 Bitcoin/cryptocurrency

That’s when I started digging deeper.
I conducted reverse-image searches on photographs he had sent me and located what appears to be the actual person associated with images being used. The information I found did not match the identity, background or circumstances that had been presented to me as “Freedom Malcolm.”

I also found information suggesting that the person appearing in the photographs has an established life/family completely inconsistent with what I had been told.
As I investigated further, other pieces of the supporting story also began falling apart, including information surrounding the supposed automobile business/credentials.

I did not send him any money.

I have reported the Tinder profile directly to Tinder as a suspected romance/financial scam and am providing screenshots and supporting evidence.
I’m sharing this because I think there’s an important misconception about romance scams:

They don’t necessarily look fake anymore.
A person can have social media.
They can have followers.
They can have photographs going back over time.
They can show you business documents.
They can know detailed information about a particular industry.
They can even video-call you.

None of those things independently prove that the name, history, businesses, relationship status, military circumstances or financial situation they’re presenting to you are legitimate.
And if someone you’ve met online eventually tells you:

“I have money, but I can’t access my account right now.”
🚨 STOP.

Especially when the solution starts involving cryptocurrency, Bitcoin, gift cards, wire transfers, paying fees, shipments, customs, overseas travel or sending money through another person.

If you encounter someone on Tinder or another dating app using the name Freedom or Freedom Malcolm and you’re hearing a similar story involving the military, deployment, automobile business, car shipments, the UK, Turkey, North Carolina property, inaccessible bank accounts, his mother, or Bitcoin, please be extremely cautious and independently verify everything.

I’m intentionally including the names and major details I was given because if another woman becomes suspicious and searches “Freedom Malcolm scam,” “Freedom Malcolm Tinder,” “Freedom Malcolm military,” “Freedom Malcolm cars,” or pieces of this story, I want her to be able to find this.

Please be careful. And don’t assume you’re safe from a romance scam simply because you’ve seen the person on video.

I don’t really know why I’m writing this. Maybe because I need to get this out of my head.
I matched with a woman on Tinder. We started talking and, over the next few days, she told me about her life being unemployed, financial problems, her two daughters, her health issues and how badly things were going for her.

At one point she told me she was high blood pressure and even sent me prescriptions and medical documents. I was honestly shocked. My first reaction wasn’t sexual. I genuinely felt bad for her and started thinking about how I could help.
I told her that I could help her find a job. I even promised her that I’d try to get her one.

I offered her money a few times because she kept talking about how difficult things were, but she refused. She said she couldn’t ask her friends or relatives and didn’t want to borrow money.

Then, a couple of days later, she said she wanted to meet.

I asked where she wanted to meet. She asked me quite directly:

**“Public place or private?”**

I told her I’d prefer somewhere private because I was also looking for some physical closeness.

That’s when the conversation changed.
She asked me how much I could help her financially.

I asked how much she needed.

She said ₹10,000.

I thought that was a lot, but told her I’d see what I could do.

She then started asking me to book a room. She also asked me to bring alcohol and cigarettes. I don’t smoke or drink normally, but I agreed to get them for her.

There was another thing I’d noticed earlier. The photographs she’d sent me looked really good, but when I later saw them properly, I realized many of them were heavily filtered/edited and possibly AI-enhanced.

Anyway, I booked the room.

She kept delaying and repeatedly told me to book the room first and that she’d come afterward.

Eventually, after I had booked it, she arrived.
And honestly, I was shocked.

She looked considerably older than the person in the photographs she’d sent me. I felt deceived and was extremely pissed off.

But I’d already booked the room, bought the cigarettes and alcohol, and I decided I’d at least sit and talk to her for some time.

She asked for cigarettes, alcohol, cold drinks, water, etc. I ordered everything.

We both drank.

The situation eventually became sexual. I was already angry, disappointed and intoxicated, and things happened that I don’t particularly feel good about now.

Afterward, the entire conversation immediately went back to money.

She asked me how much I was going to give her.
Then she started showing me photographs and social media accounts of her daughters and talking about their problems and things they were apparently involved with.

At that point I was completely exhausted and confused. I just wanted to leave.

Even after we left the room, she kept asking about the money.

I eventually gave her ₹5,000 and left.
And that’s it.
No dramatic ending.
No police case.
No big confrontation.
Just me sitting afterward and thinking:
**What the fuck did I just do?**

The strange thing is that I still can’t decide how I feel about the whole thing.

Part of me feels that I was manipulated.

Part of me feels stupid for ignoring the obvious red flags.

Part of me thinks maybe she really was struggling and I did help her in whatever small way I could.
And another part of me thinks I completely misunderstood what this whole interaction was from the beginning.

I went into it thinking I was helping someone get back on her feet.

I came out feeling like I had participated in a transaction I never really understood.

I’m not posting this to call her a scammer. I don’t actually know what parts of her story were true.
I’m posting because I’m genuinely curious:
**Has anyone experienced something similar on Tinder?**

Where you started talking to someone because you genuinely connected with their story, and somewhere along the way the whole thing became transactional?

And more importantly…

**How do you stop replaying something like this in your head?**

Having my first video call with someone I met on a dating app. What should I look for that might indicate a scam?

Romance scams cost victims billions each year, and the warning signs are often easier to spot in hindsight. Here are eight red flags our fraud experts say you should never ignore:

1. A “wrong number” text. If you reply, you’ll soon find yourself in conversation with them. Almost as if they’ve created a relationship out of thin air. 

2. Someone claims to be a celebrity reaching out via a private social media account asking for money for bills or for meet & greets.

3. A person wants you to move the communication to another platform. If you met on a dating site, they’ll quickly ask for your number or suggest communicating via WhatsApp or another messaging platform. Dating sites have the ability to identify and block scammers, so they want to move the conversation off of them as soon as possible. 

4. Someone who lives far away. You can’t meet in person — yet — because they claim to live in another part of the country or to be abroad for business, a military deployment, on an oil rig, or doing charity work. 

5. The person is constantly in contact. They love bomb you, texting at all hours and promising a life together. 

6. You make plans to meet, but something always comes up. Just as they’re finally on their way to meet you, there’s a last-minute crisis. 

7. They need money for an emergency. Your online companion has a sudden medical problem, legal crisis or business disaster; they need cash fast and you’re the only one who can help. 

8. They have an investment opportunity. They have a relative who’s done well in cryptocurrency investing, and they want you to benefit from their knowledge.

 

If you spot any of these warning signs, here’s what to do next: 

Cut off contact. Immediately stop communicating if you suspect the individual may be a scammer. Do not re-engage with them. Notify the dating or social media site on which you met the scammer. 

Report the scammer to local law enforcement and the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3.gov). Not every complaint leads to enforcement action, but the information can help officials spot trends and sometimes identify the criminals.  

For support and guidance, call the free AARP Fraud Watch Network Helpline at 877-908-3360, where trained fraud specialists can share information on what to do next and how to avoid future scams. The AARP Fraud Watch Network also offers online group support sessions.

Does a person catching feelings for a romance scammer within 2 weeks indicate that they are a ‘fast burner’ romantic?

Recently, I met someone here on reddit. We talked on WA, and ofc I sent him things I shouldn’t have in return of u know something that would benefit me. He was nice, and all of a sudden we didn’t talk since he was going away for a trip. And of course I didn’t overthink things. Yesterday, I messaged him and his profile was still there but my message only has one tick. Now, I checked again, my messages have 1 tick and his profile is gone, I tried adding him in a group but I cant add him, so I know that he blocked me. I looked for his Viber, so I messaged him to keep our private messages confidential. He hasnt replied yet.

I am scared because he might do something with the things I sent him. I am really worried now.

Just found this group so maybe I can vent about this a bit. So 2 years ago I found my grandma was in this romance scam when she told me she was talking to this famous singer.. she’s 68. She met this “guy” on a fan club page that was my first red flag, but she claimed they started chatting thru the app WhatsApp and he was supposed to come take a private jet to where she lives and pick her up to move her out to Mexico to live. Also he told her he bought her a new iPhone lol but she never got it. she had to sign some “paper” with her personal info to get him a private jet 🤦🏻‍♀️ it got so bad she sold her little house and gave him all the money from it she had to open up multiple bank accounts because she was maxing out her other ones she was taking out way to many random loans. She did get herself in the hospital to where she left her phone at the house and I was able to look thru it and I seen a convo between them and I was shocked it was nothing but love bombing and she was sending gift cards online from her social security checks and that’s all the money she has coming thru anymore. She now lives on my moms couch still to this day talking to this man even tho she knows we all know he’s a scammer… it’s as crazy that she has a wallpaper of him and her cropped together.. and my mom doesn’t care cuz she never had a backbone to put her foot down and I tried my hardest to get her to open her eyes but she won’t. Her life has literally been thrown completely away and it’s mind blowing to see. At this point I believe it’s a mental distress issue that can never be fixed. She’s treated me so poorly for trying to help to the point I gave up on helping the situation. Am I a bad person for that?

40M, meeting someone has always been a problem for me, I became so desperate to the point, that I ignored all the signs of a scam. Be safe out there, try not to be desperate, and if you can't just don't let desperation push you into making mistakes.

EDIT: When I started the university 20 years ago I started to have real interest in meeting someone for a relationship and maybe start something serious. Despite my social anxiety I found the courage to approach women and ask them out, I never had any luck whatsoever, everyone would just decline, they re taken, ans whatnot... In the last 10 years, as I turned 30, I started to get a little desperate, everyone around me was gettung married, or settling in other forms of relationships. I have also been trying online solutions, I paid all kinds of services but no results, 10 years ago I met this girl on tinder, and she had sudden interest in me, she looked not suspiciously that good, but she (it'sa SHE I heard her voice) knew how to make it feel real, we talked for weeks and then she said she s ready to meet, she said she actually lived in another city 4 hours away, she needed money to travel to me and for accomodation, I was hesitant at first, it didnt feel right, but thrn I thought "I'll never get another chance like this" so I sent her the money in form of Amazon giftcard, and we agreed upon a date, she never came, after few days, she contacted me again to apologise and give her another chance I blocked her and never talked to her, that was around 2018,in a European country. I came back home in 2020, and got stuck hdre and lost the possibility to go back to europe, when I was in Europe I met a girl from country (on facebook) who was way younger than me, I liked her a lot, we exchanged phone numbers. And talked on whatsapp, she seemed genuine and very into me, when I went back to my country, we decided to meet, so I booked an airbnb, where she lived and we decided where to go and, I went there in the agreed upon time, she never came and gave me a really good reason, because she told me already about her mother, I gave her another chance, but I was already back to mu town,and we started talking again, few months pass, she started to ask for money to help her mother, I sent her, every time she asked I sent her, I had a business trip to a city close to hers, so we agreed to meet, shr asked for money to get a haircut and prepare herself for the date, I did, I book the airbnb, I arrive and wait for her in the restaurant, but she never came. I felt like a total idiot.

Hi everyone,

​I'm posting here because I have strong doubts about a recent interaction and would like your feedback or experiences.

​I met a woman on Personality Database (PDB), but the whole setup has been very strange from the start:

​The setup: She claims she's on PDB to help a friend find a guy (so she's not the person directly on the profile).

​The background: She says she's of Asian descent, lives in Rotterdam, and comes across as quite superficial.

​The contact info: We moved to WhatsApp, but she's using a WhatsApp Business account with a +44 (UK) number, despite claiming to live in the Netherlands.

​The behavior: She's fairly distant in her messages, yet constantly brings up her business and investments. At the same time, she keeps repeating that she wants a "serious relationship."

​The video call: Unusually for this kind of interaction, she's insisting on doing a video call.

​I'm really suspicious and worried this might be a trap (blackmail or a crypto/financial scam). As a precaution, I gave her a fake number.

​Does this pattern sound familiar to anyone? Have you ever run into a profile like this?

​Thanks for your help!

My 71 year old mother doesn’t believe this person claiming to a US citizen stuck in Venezuela is a scammer those he has accepted almost $100,00 of her money and she is preparing to send another $170,000. I have contacted the FBI, the FTC, the senate committee on aging, our state’s AG and senior services, her bank. I’ve been in contact with her financial advisor and doctor and nothing can be done. We just have to watch her give everything she has away waiting for this person to show up.

For over 3 years now I have been trying to figure out whether my sister (and parents) are being scammed or if my sister is a compulsive liar. Granted, it could also be that she is being scammed and she is a compulsive liar, which is the more likely of the 3.

Around 2023 my mother informed me that my sister was dating / engaged to a celebrity that she met on set while playing a part for a popular vampire TV show. I personally don't care much for vampire media or idolizing celebrities, but to each their own. However, when I heard this I immediately was suspicious. From what I am told, they met on set and hit it off which led to them getting engaged. As far as I am aware (and I have dug through every possible resource and credit I can) my sister has never been part of this show, but she claims to have played a part in it for the last 2 seasons. Now you would think her never having actually showed up in any scene, it would be obviously to my parents that something is pretty god damn fishy right? Nope, they and her still to this day swear that she is in the show. Whenever I would question what scenes she was in, my mother would send me some screenshot my sister sent to her of some blurry person in the background or extra (all who I was able to verify as definitely not my fucking sister). Mind you her part is supposed to be an important one, from what I am told.

Back to the romance scam. I was told that this famous guy bought her a multi-million dollar home in New Orleans (She has been living with my parents all her life and still currently). This home has actually been up for sale for around a year now, and I have considered taking a trip down that way to gather more info / potentially speak to the actual owners if possible. In classic romance scam fashion, every single planned event where this guy is supposed to come meet my parents or my sister is supposed to go be with him, the plans get canned last minute. This has happened a nauseating amount of times, and every time it does, I want to push my thumbs into my eyes until I touch my own brain. At some point this person started texting my mother and father, but mainly my mother which added a while new level of discomfort and anxiety for me. There was a point early on where I had made jokes asking for proof but there was never anything shown to me. Even worse, my mother or father had never even met this guy a single time, not even on video chat (not that that would make a difference these days). It wasn't until last year I think, that my mother talked to "the guy" over video call and she is constantly reassuring me that everything is real.

Around the same time about a year ago, it was made public that the guy has actually been in a long-term relationship with another costar. When I brought this up to my mother and asked what the number was that he messages her from, it ended it me getting yelled at for an hour with things like "That's his personal number, I'm not going to just give that out." And "You don't want your sister to be happy." And "You are pushing your future brother in law away." And "It's so rude that you are asking for proof, and it makes him upset that you can't take a man at his word." Yada yada. My sister even had an excuse that my mother believed to explain way the relationship with the other costar. Again, in classic romance scam fashion it involved some heartbreaking tragedy, where they aren't actually together it's just for publicity and "the company" makes them post old photos. My sister has all of these stories about being on the set and with this guy that are so over the top and unbelievable to the point that it is laughable that they don't question any of it. My mother has been through far far too much suffering in this life, trying to keep us safe when we were kids from some horrible shit. As an adult now, I make it a point to keep her safe from horrible stuff, and I'm this case it has only led to me being accused of being untrustworthy and rude.

Recently, the guy and my sister were able to get my mother a small part on the show.... This likely involves filling out paperwork which would be a very convenient way for my mother to divulge her SSN and other personal info to whoever this is. This isn't even an a third of all of the things because this post would never end. My other siblings are also skeptical but none of them have the balls to speak up aside from me, so I just gave up. I realized that odds are whoever this person is will likely just use me as a scapegoat when they inevitably dip out. Looking through all of my sisters social media accounts and who / what she follows I realized that she is literally the perfect mark for one of these scammers to pose as the celebrity she is obsessed with. Anytime I see an add for this show it just fills me with anger and anxiety toward the whole situation. I want to believe that my sister is just love sick and being taken advantage of, but she is very clearly lying to my mother about how real this whole thing is.

No matter what I say, or what I do to try to protect my parents, in the end I just get insulted for it.

So my mom has been getting scammed for a couple years now. In October 2025 my dad passes away from stage 4 colon cancer. My dad always worked and provided for me and my mom. He has helped me raise my 3 children as well because their dad is scum. Anyway, when he passed we got some money and I let my mom put it in her savings to keep it safe. She promised me she would keep it there in case she needed it or the kids needed something. She was broke by December but I never said anything because I was grieving and trying to get through life.

My mom and I share a cell phone plan and we split the bill. So my mom promised me she would pay her half of the cell phone bill and she didn’t. I’ve paid the full bill 3 months in a row and I told her I could no longer afford to do that. She messages me yesterday and tell me her home phone and internet are disconnected. So I went over there after work and exploded. I’ve tried talking to her nicely about giving her money away and getting scammed but she doesn’t seem to care. I took her phone and demanded to see her bank statements and she wouldn’t show them to me. I found out she’s let the home owners insurance go and has took out personal loans to keep giving to these scammers. I’m done with it, I can’t keep worrying. The house she lives in is my house, but it’s in a life estate. She can live there until she passes if she wants to. But she doesn’t ever stay there, she will stay there during the day but go spend the night at her sisters. I told her sister what was happening and she confronted her. My mom stopped going over there. Idk what to do. If she isn’t going to live there why not let me have it so I don’t have to pay rent. Why not give all your money to me instead of scammers, why watch your child struggle and your grandchildren.

She’s been scammed out of like 40k that I know of. I told her she could either let me help her and get her out of this situation or she could choose the scammer. She’s not spoke to me in almost a month. It’s like she doesn’t care. She would rather choose this fantasy than have her own family.

So she logged in on the highly probable scam site and I have live access.

How do I now download the entire chat log which is still getting used by likely AM and the lady being scammed by it please?

Urgent to resplendent I take any further steps as I think she has bought him something (ie sent money) looking now but being shady in order not to let her notice I am only e too.

Thanks people, she is in deep.

You receive a text on your phone that says something like “Hi Annie, can we meet at Starbucks today?”

You reply, I’m sorry but you have the wrong number

“She” replies, oh sorry I must have saved the number wrong. I hope I didn’t disturb you.

You reply, no worries, it happens.

“She” She replies thank you for being so understanding, may I ask who I am speaking with?

You reply, I’m Larry.

“She” replies, hi I’m Elaine nice to meet you. You seem like a gentleman. May I ask where you live? I live in Los Angeles

You reply, I live in New Jersey.

“She” replies, maybe we can be friends. I’m 38 and I’m a wedding dress designer. What do you do? Maybe you can send a picture of yourself so I know who I’m talking to.

You send a picture of yourself and get hers in return. 90% of the time it’s a picture of a beautiful Asian woman. So you run it through a facial recognition app like pimeyes and tons of pictures come through, dating apps, porn sites, from Instagram etc.

Next up she says this is my business phone. I chat with family and friends on WhatsApp. Can we meet over there?

You say okay and now she’s on a mission to groom you; flatters you and after awhile she explains that she has an uncle who has helped her make a lot money trading cryptocurrencies. She wants to let you in on it. Her story is like all the other scammers; divorced because her husband cheated on her and abused her; moved from China to LA, etc.. starts telling you she is attracted to you. Then she asks to download an app like Crypto.com Onchain, or another decentralized app and then gives you a url to access an exchange which 100% of the time is fake. You run the url through scam advisor and sure enough, the url is a new site and fraudulent.

Then you confront her and she gets all defensive and starts lying and gaslighting you. Before you know it she disappears from WhatsApp.

I’ve played with these scammers for a few years and turn all the info I have over to various US authorities. They follow a script and it’s always some Chinese, Eastern European or Nigerian dude.

I do home care and work with a man who is disabled. Hes been lonely for a while and really wanting a gf and lately he met a woman online who has fell for. Im happy he's happy but I really think she's a catfish. Within the first few days of chatting with her online she has already asked him for $100 for car problems which he believed her and gave it then another $200 for rent. The pictures of her look like she's some kind of model, he hasn't talked to her through FaceTime/video or phone convo only online and she tells him she's head over heels in love with him. I want to tell him so badly how I feel but don't want to hurt his feelings because he's so ecstatic about her. He talks about her nonstop and how he wants to marry her and I just go along with it.

I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask this question specifically but I could do with some other point of views.

My sister is 18 and she met her boyfriend online who is a 25 year old Nigerian. I tried to not racial profile but I'll be honest it did raise some red flags. As she turned 18 she gained access to a decent amount of inheritance money which has quickly disappeared around the same time as they started to meet in person. Apparently he works a decent job in London but he's been asking my sister for money because his visa is running out but why does he need the money if he has this decent job, my sister has fallen for him hard and based off of the little bits of information I've managed to get out of her it all points to her being manipulated and used but then there's the chance that maybe that really isn't the case, as much as I'm finding that hard to believe rn, really want to hear other opinions on this.