u/xBeauregardx

Hello! Paano po magcommute from Mandaluyong (Greenfield District area) to Balibago, Pampanga?

Thank you.

Hello, how to commute from Mandaluyong (specifically Greenfield area) to Balibago, Pampanga? Thank you.

Hello, how to commute from Mandaluyong (Greenfield area) to Balibago, Pampanga?

Thank you so much in advance.

I recently lost a grandparent. I’m not sure how to explain this feeling, but this is my first major loss. He was my mother’s dad, and on her side, we were a small family of ten. My grandfather was the quiet type, but I always knew he loved us dearly.

Losing a grandparent in your 20s feels like a different kind of heartbreak. We were never the “emotional” or “vocal” type of family, but all ten of us were almost always together every weekend, having Sunday lunches at their home.

I feel especially sad today. I recall during the interment, I spent most of my energy helping around the house, running errands, and such. I put on a brave face because I’ve never been comfortable showing my emotions in public — especially not in front of my grieving family. But every time I got home, I found myself going back to my grandfather’s Facebook profile, rereading his posts, looking through old photos, our family pictures, and crying alone. Grieving privately.

In our family group chat, old photos with the grandkids were shared — there are only four of us. I realized there wasn’t a single recent photo of me with him as an adult. There was one of my brother during his college graduation with both our grandparents, and my two younger cousins had many more because they lived with them. But they couldn’t find one for me. Hindi ako yung lumaki sa lolo at lola.

I tried searching through my own Facebook account and couldn’t find any photos with my grandparents from my graduation either. That broke my heart. I felt selfish for thinking this way, but I suddenly felt like I was the farthest from him — my brother being the first grandchild, and my younger cousins growing up in the same house as them.

When I got home, I searched through my laptop for hours and was fortunate enough to find a photo of me with my grandfather from seven years ago. That’s when I cried hard again.

I know it’s nobody’s fault, and maybe this feeling is on me, but it hurts having to grieve alone. I haven’t really reached out to family or friends, even though they sent their condolences and I truly appreciated every message. I didn’t realize how badly I wanted someone to check up on me until a coworker messaged me earlier asking how I was doing.

I know death is a part of life, but it’s painful to realize that life keeps moving for everyone else while we’re left here adjusting to the absence. It hurts knowing that from now on, we will be taking photos of only nine family members instead of ten.

Now I understand more what it means to “live as if you’re going to die tomorrow.” It may sound cliché, but please hug your grandparents or your loved ones for me tonight.