as the title says, i need a game that can fit all my six friends in it. HORROR would be great but we'll take any genre!
i'm tired of only seeing 4 co-op horror games, and even non-horror ones. is there a reason to this? like why do they only (most games) go up to only 4?
Hello all. I'm an older sister (21) of a younger brother (11) and as the title says, I'm horrible at being a role model to my brother, and I've known this for all the years I've been with him. I want to change because I've become aware of how scary I've been getting.
(LONG VENT POST AHEAD)
TLDR: I'm a terrible older sister for taking out my jealousy on my brother who's receiving better care than when I did when I was his age. I want to change because I know it's not his fault. I just got the short end of the stick.
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For context.
My parents had him when I was only 10. I didn't know shit back then about raising a sibling, an infant.
When my brother wasn't born yet, I've already had a strained relationship with my parents. I know no parent is ever perfect, and not all of them are total angels of purity. My parents didn't know better at raising a child. It's their first time at living and being a parent too. I've accepted that part.
What I haven't accepted yet is the fact that they were so harsh with me when it was just.. me. I've had cloth hangers, belts, brooms, on my skin whenever I was disciplined. I was isolated. I was slapped. I was pinched and smacked. When I had my first ever tablet around 10, they would take that away from me for months, even a year, as a punishment. It would depress me a lot because that's where I've only ever gotten genuine friends from.
Then, years went by and of course I've grown into a teenager. My brother's a toddler by then. I'd be 15 and he'd be 5. But it didn't make things easier. My parents didn't really have the picture perfect marriage and did fight/argue sometimes, so I was there to protect my brother.
When my dad would get violent or have his patience ran out whether to my mother or brother, I would hide my brother away to my room and calm him down by hugging and comforting him.
My brother and I were close around those ages, we didn't argue or banter much, I took care of him when my parents were away. But things have started going downhill when I saw how my parents were disciplining him much differently than they did when I was his age.
They were gentler. They were more patient. When I've had hangers and belts often as punishment, what he had was once and they stopped.
It got worse when he had his tablet. They never took it away from him whenever they disciplined him. Whereas they always took mine away for months.
That's when I realised that I was jealous. I know I sound like a child. I shouldn't be jealous—I should be happy that my little brother wasn't getting the same treatment as I did. Trust me, I am happy, but there's this dark little part inside of me that was jealous.
I tried to not let it fester. I didn't want that jealousy to bring harm to my brother, it's not his fault that my parents had gotten softer. But it did anyway.
It got worse when he got older, at the age of 10-11. Whenever I saw him doing bad things that deserved disciplinary action and my parents didn't give a shit, I took charge of that. I thought it was something I should do as the older sister. And while I did discipline him, he had turned bratty and always talked back, even physically smacking, which I knew was a byproduct of being coddled by my parents. That in turn led me to becoming my mother's past self.
I started acting like my mother. I was mean, I yelled bad things at him, cursing at him, whenever he did something wrong. In my mind it was discipline, because that's how I was disciplined at his age. And that jealous part of me took that as some sort of 'payback', when it wasn't even his fault.
It's evil. To think that that little part of me was giving it as payback. Questions in my mind were, how dare they not punish him the way they punished me? Why did I get the short end of the stick? Why didn't they hurt him the way they hurt me? Why have they gotten softer, when back then they were so unregrettably harsh?
When I was asked by my mother why I was so harsh with my brother, I caught myself saying, "I'm only doing what you used to do to me when I was a kid. It's not being harsh, I'm disciplining him." and that's what made things clear for me. I haven't healed from my own traumas, and now I'm projecting it onto my brother who we all failed at raising.
For what it's worth, I never physically harmed him with objects. The worst thing I've done was pinching his ear and smacking his knee, but that doesn't excuse the shit I've done. I know it's still harming him.
I'm writing this after an argument my brother and I just had an hour ago. It wasn't even that big of a deal, I don't know why my head made it look like he did such a crime. He only took some change money and bought himself some chips without permission. I took that personally because back then I would've been whooped by my mom if I did that, calling me evil and dumb. So, I yelled at him, called him a thief, stupid, and pinched his ear, which of course made him breakdown into tears.
What stopped me was when he started crying, "I don't want a sister anymore. I want to disappear from this world. I never hurt you, so why are you hurting me?" My guilt is killing me and I deserve it. But I want to change. I've been wanting to change. As bratty and mean as he is, I know he doesn't deserve my false sense of justice for my traumatic upbringing.
He's only 11 years old, for God's sake. He doesn't deserve this. I've thought about leaving our home for both our sakes, I want him to live peacefully without him having to walk eggshells around me, but I'm still studying and don't have the means to move out. This is his home too. I hate myself for being this way but I'm not looking for pity, I want advice on how to change. I know my anger issues have contributed a lot for this behaviour of mine as well and my very little patience for bratty children.
You may call me names and such if you want to, I know I would. I'm aware of how shitty of a sister I am.
Nakakakilabot mga gantong page/vlogs na ginagatasan pa yung video about sa bata na ginagahasa ng kamag-anak niya. Andami ring nagpapasend sa comments. I would like to formally report a crime but I don't know how. I just want the page to be taken down. Nakakadiri amputa. I want them to know the consequences. They're spreading ch1ld p0rnoʻgraphy na as if napaka-casual lang.
PSA if you want to spread awareness, DO IT PROPERLY, hindi yung halatado kang ginagawa lang for clout. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO POST A PICTURE OF THE VIDEO. Filipino vloggers are one of the most desperate breeds for clout.