u/youaskedforrit

Hello everyone.

I got a call from a friend A (28m) whose gf (pwbpd, 31f) was looking to talk out a fight they were having. She kept talking over him, bringing up random old unrelated incidences etc to blame A.

They've been having fights continuously like this for 2 years they've been together, and it seems to get worse and worse over time.

The gf keeps disecting the tiniest things about A/things A does, and escalating things disproportionately. Their most recent fight was about A unblocking one of GF's friends some 2 weeks ago, but failing to bring it up.

GF then went to the other friend and told her A had blocked her which resulted in her blocking A.

(Editing also to add: GF also changes her story based on who she speaks to. Apparently she was claiming to A she was glad about the problem that happened, then when in conversation with me she claimed that she was trying to pacify everyone in the equation. A told me later that she added details which changed the story.

She has been gaslighting him over their relationship as well. She has announced she thought some dj was the ideal perfect man and she wanted to marry him in front of A, and then later on claimed that she would never say such things.)

These people called me to explain the situation and get some insight, GF insists on this, specifically hoping A's female friends will take her side. They've done this before, and I tried to be objective, but it's not possible because GF is straight up abusive.

The rules of their relationship are only for A, GF can do whatever she wants, and never has to answer to A. Infact when A asks for explanations, that makes GF flare up.

I avoid GF, because one time there was group hang, and she spent 2 hours HOUNDING A for some random insignificant thing, and I could feel myself get nauseous and terrified.

A, a different friend and I were scared shitless, so we just avoid hanging out w GF whenever she's around.

I couldn't control because A has recently begun having panic attacks and generally having the worst mental health he's ever had.

He's called me up saying GF has probably died because she won't answer her phone at 3am and she's had a history of substance abuse.

He's also been panicking that she will leave him, while simultaneously also saying he wants to ☠️ himself.

Coming back to today, I caught GF on some bs she was spewing and she got mad saying she didn't like my energy blah blah and that I was branding her aggressive.

They broke up on the phone, now afterwards she's demanding an apology from me. I'm thinking I meddled in their relationship, but I cannot watch my friend get abused any longer.

He is an incredibly talented artist, and he's losing his will to live.

Idk, what should I have done? What's the right answer? Should I let them handle themselves?

What if my friend A ends his life? I've never seen him be this bad.

Hey ladies,

I'm not new to this feeling but today I'm really coming to understand my stance on this. I might actually remain single for the rest of my life.

For context, I'm 29F, Indian.

I've dated around tons, and I simply cannot tolerate men anymore. My father is one of the most useless men I have ever come across. He is not just useless, he also actively inconveniences my mother and I all the time. My mother ofcourse has coddled him and let him remain an overgrown child, but I too am expected to labour for him.

I've found every single man I have dated/slept with has been apathetic, irritating and more than comfortable using me for various reasons. I am sick and tired of it.

Men, to me, are good for nothing. I would've mentioned sex, but most of them have no empathy and are truly apathetic towards my pleasure. I merely tolerate them for sex.

I must come across as cold and unkind, but I assure you, I have loved and laboured for men, and I honestly feel the more a woman gives to a man, the more he wants to take. He has an evergrowing desire to use and abuse what women have to offer.

This one guy I was kind of seeing, but not really because he was so inconsistent, today sent me a link to a yt short titled "why I hate my girlfriend" he was expecting me to laugh. It was satirical, but I don't find anti-woman humor funny in any form.

I am sorry if my words are too negative, I'm just done. I probably will just use men for what little they can offer which is sex and continue leading my life single.

I have so much love to give, I will continue to care for the earth and spread my love to the things that deserve it such as animals and children and for social-good causes.

Thanks for reading.