u/zombie-brain-eater

Hi, all! I’m somewhat new to this community, but I wanted to share some thoughts I had tonight.

I’m so thankful I’m aro. When I realized I was, naturally I was upset. I had known about what I was feeling (or lack thereof) for a long time, but putting a name to it made it ‘real’.

Today I was at dinner with a friend who was telling me all of his dating misadventures. Sure, the stories were exciting and funny, but all I could think about was ‘oh my god, this sounds like my worst nightmare’.

It got me thinking. Although being aro can be a spectrum, I fall at the far end of the spectrum and feel absolutely no romantic desire or drive. So many people would hear this and think ‘what a sad life!’ but even if there was a magic button that I could press to make me ‘not aromantic’, I wouldn’t hit it.

I love the unique perspective that it gives me and honestly, the thought about never having to deal with romance is AMAZING.

I would love to hear any stories you guys have or some of your favorite aro perks!

Hi, guys. (F22). I guess this is me coming out. I guess. So this maybe sounds stupid. But I kind of recently figured out that I’m aro and I’m freaking out a little. I’ll explain.

So whenever I was a kid, romance disgusted me. Like, kissing, hugging, any PDA or anything in general really sent chills down my spine. I assumed that was ‘normal’ because I was pre-pubescent/going through puberty and boys were ‘gross’.

Then came high school. Again, same idea. I assumed I was a lesbian because I ‘hated’ men, however didn’t have any experience.

Now comes the realization. Within the past two years I had been in a committed relationship with a woman, which ultimately failed because the thought of doing anything romantic totally grossed me out. I figured ‘hey maybe I’m just not gay’ so I went on dates with men (some really great men, too!). Nothing. NADA. Every time I ended up rushing home because I couldn’t handle it.

I had heard of the term ‘asexual’ but that didn’t really feel right because I have been intimate with people and enjoyed that. I just figured I was (bad stereotype) a gross pervert for only liking sex without romantic attachment.

But… here I am. A few internet searches later. Turns out that there are other people like me.

Naturally, I have a lot of worries about what the future holds, but oh my god, what a fucking relief. No more searching ‘for the right guy’ or ‘forcing myself to love’.

I’m so ready to just be me.