I’m liberal and I’m looking for explanations that are deeper than “reality has a liberal bias”.

Hi everyone. I’m a late diagnosed person on the spectrum (level 2 support, diagnosed when 37, now 38 years old), working on Biology, Humanities, and Museum (mostly critical museum studies of Natural History Museums), from South America. I had to move to Europe to find work on research, since research and innovation is underfunded in my home country. The country I’ve been living in the past year is more accessible for neurodivergent people, but my work environment and academia in general feels less equipped (or less interested) to receive and/or maintain people on the spectrum (or even with other manifestations of neurodivergence). I would like to know more about the experience of neurodivergent researchers from this subreddit on how you navigate this environment.

PS: I’m not fluent in English. Apologies for any mistake or inconsistent writing or convoluted thoughts.

We are playing a game where you can give 100% effort and the machine treats it like it's worth 20%, yet we still break our own spirits trying to win it.

I ended up having a massive, draining debate about this with a close friend of mine who is incredibly smart, fiercely independent, and completely self-made. I was talking about how rigged things like university admissions, job markets, and general success are by wealth, legacy, and pure luck rather than actual hard work.

Even though she fully acknowledges that the deck is stacked, her reaction completely blew my mind. She basically told me that she doesn't care if privileged kids buy their way into elite spaces because they don't have actual knowledge. She plans to out-perform them on pure academics, and flat out said that if she didn't have the money for expensive clubs or international volunteer trips, she shouldn't whine about it, she should just be more eager and hunt down every possible loophole to thrive.

She lives by a strict "survival of the fittest" mentality. She treats the world like an arena where only the strongest survive, and told me that even if the system is completely unfair, if she fails, she will still blame herself. Even if she literally destroys herself or dies from the pressure, she will take total responsibility for not being strong enough.
When I asked her why she would willingly carry the guilt of a broken game, she just looked at me and asked "Well, what am I supposed to do about it?"

And honestly, that stopped me. Because practically speaking, she’s right. Pointing out that a machine is smoking doesn't fix it today, and it doesn't give you a free pass to survive without its currency. I want to believe in the grind, too. But it hurts to realize that the system rarely values your hard work equally to the actual effort you put into it.

We kept texting about it later, and her final conclusion was basically "Look, I get why you think empathy and questioning the system matter, and you aren't wrong for feeling that deeply. But people still need to take action if they want things to change, even in unfair situations. I focus on action and control instead of emotion, I'm just too much like my dad at this point."

It made me realize that for a lot of deeply driven people, a "survival of the fittest" mindset and self-blame are just the ultimate shields. Admitting the system is unfair feels like admitting helplessness, so they put on this heavy armor just to feel like they have some control over their outcomes.

But it proved to me that speaking up and questioning the rules actually does something. Just by having this conversation, she went from dismissing the argument entirely to at least understanding why questioning the system matters.

I’m still trying to process this "climb to the top" paradox and want to hear what you guys think

Is this hyper-independent, borderline self-destructive "grind" mentality a necessary armor to survive a harsh reality, or are we just coping by internalizing toxic shame?

When the world is built around the idea that "only the strongest survive," what are we actually supposed to do about it on an individual level besides just grinding harder?

How do you cope with the reality that society rarely values your hard work equally to the actual effort you put into it?

With the Epstein Files release and many secrets of the dark Side of Hollywood being revealed, inappropriate Jokes made on TV, in the talkshows, in the movies etc. , that somehow got above our heads.

Teachers, Churches, Family it seems all societies arent exempt from this disease. Why, especially with all that is available today , why do abusers still resort to such henious acts and why is it so rampant?

Edit: Many answers refer to Teens, I'm talking about children! What makes any adult harm children.

EDIT: I used the word progressivism. Please detach yourself from the word as a political term for the post, btw. I mean it strictly in the sense of the act of society wanting to progress in something. This is nothing to do with politics; it's to do with human nature as a society.

Like, obviously there are some specific things we rightfully want to progress in, but—to me—it seems like it can also be about the progression itself. Or, maybe a more accurate perspective is we need to find faults in what we have.

This is just one odd example: lets take nudity in films (probably part of a bigger picture). It used to not really exist in films; rare, at least. We collectively felt restrictive. That nudity was part of art. That sexuality was human nature. We wanted to embrace it and allow the creative minds to not be restrictive.

Now? Now we seem to be veering away from it. Not those in power, btw. Society as a whole. That women are equal to men and not to be sexualized. And now, the film industry seems to be reflecting societies wants. The big blockbuster movies are not really showing nudity.

When nudity wasn't popular in films, we had legitimate perspectives for why we should. When we have it in films, we have legitimate perspectives why it shouldn't be.

Is what I am noticing an actual thing when studying humans collectively? If so, what do we do about it? How can we let people know when they want society to change into something that it will also likely come with problematic perspectives; that we may not necessarily be progressing towards something *better*, but just different? Are we always *truly* looking for "better"? Or did change end up becoming dull and we need to look for faults to chase progression again?

Also See: https://www.reddit.com/r/SwimmingCircleJerk/comments/1tcsozj/comment/olqhyzi/

Many pieces of feminist media point to the idea that rape is inherently based in power dynamics and is a form of exerting control over another. However, from my own observations, it seems like these perpetrators are sometimes drawn to these power structures / dynamics as a rationalization / opportunity for their existing motivation to commit rape, rather than being the soil upon which the idea to rape sprouts.

Given this, I don’t understand: when considering rape as a power play, how is rape separate from sexual desire / dysregulation?

Additionally, if rape IS considered a crime of power, at what level is sexual involvement not considered an act of control? Is mental objectification of someone considered an act of control? Is sexual, non-romantic desire toward someone an act of control?

Which books, YouTube channels and podcasts would save your life?

I heard a fellow leftist mention it in passing, and frankly as a hypersexual exhibitionist, I think I’m offended? I understand how hyper-sexuality in many ways can be unhealthy for not just the hypersexual in question, however… 1. you don’t have to indulge 2. The mentally stable hooker upers definitely aren’t the ones supporting nor enabling rapists 3. “Hook up culture is detrimental as a whole” sounds suspiciously puritan

The actual question

Is hook up culture detrimental? If so how?