Depressive.
It's so excessive.
It's almost impressive with how it's so oppressive.
Truly obsessive, a obsession.
A session of the fascination with my devastation.
Comes and goes with it's highs and lows.
What do I owe?
Debt for the depth of my human soul?
Dread is so demeaning, it's inhumane.
Yet, I'm loyal to the crucial cruelty.
You've been wondering where I've been.
I've been hiding in my cocoon.
I need to hide now and then.
From my sadness and blues.
I built up my cocoon from tiny silken threads.
I'm not coming out anytime soon.
With all these sad thoughts in my head.
It's been sad and lonely lately.
It's taken away my health.
The thing that I've learned lately.
Is that I'm better by myself.
Just leave me alone.
Let me feel what I need to feel.
This cocoon has become my home.
I'm the only one that can help me heal.
When I'm ready to face the world.
I'll spread my butterfly wings.
When they are ready to be unfurled.
Maybe my heart will no longer sting.
The most painful thing about it.
I'm finding out who my friends are.
I never had a doubt about it.
All I was left with was me, and the moon and stars.
The ferry would leave sometime at the end of the day
Some of the visitors made themselves at the picnic table
In the gully further from the port
pollen poured down from the hills
James was bragging about his time in california
About witnessing redwoods and impossible autumns
A sense of something passing through your hands
That you couldn't close your fingers around
As he spoke a cold front came through the sea
The surf became choppy kilometers down the hill
The cloud multiplied itself sporting innocent whites
The stirring and sliding into guilty grays
Maybe thunder clapped, rain came in blocks
James and his friends walked back to port
The rain soaking their sweatshirts
exacting frowns, dampening their moods
They didn't bother seeking shelter under narrow bridges
Their long walk was so dreary in that thick rain
They started to lose their hope, no breaks, no lull
They started to forget their own names.