r/OffMyChestMY

One more week till I am so done with July.

So many shit happened in between weeks and made a lot of dumb decisions to feel in the void. Every time I think back, it made me look like a desperate dumb bitch.

I downloaded Bumble on first week and went out with this guy. We had great chemistry and whatnot but he wasn’t even my type. My dumb aah went and accepted him to be my unofficial boyfriend and within a week, I broke it off due to incompatibility and he was way too boomer for a 24 years old. I literally had to explain every single replies whether it is serious or sarcastic from me.

Then, another guy from our neighbouring country slid into my TikTok DMs and escalated things quickly. Barely few hours of knowing each other, he wanted to video call me but I rejected. Few days of chatting, we exchanged contacts on WhatsApp and started video calling every single day. Guess what happened? My dumb aaahh texted him “ure irritating asf” without any stickers/ emojis so he thought I was mad at him. I got ghosted for two days straight and then he came back texting saying he is giving me the space to wind down. I explained to him that there has been some sort of miscommunication and misinterpretation from both ends. (Btw, he love bombs so quick so I distanced myself when I needed too)

I swear my love life is a joke at this point. My main goal right now is to actually focus on myself and do what she needs to slay in her 20s but as soon as a man enters, she loses herself again. BIG FAT JOKE 😭😭

(Told my friends I am taking one for the team for the hopeless romantic stories)

Oh, how I had missed the gentle touch of your hands on my body.

So tender…
touching me without asking for permission.

How long had you been holding yourself back?
Hiding behind the armor of an impenetrable man.

Yet I saw that wonderfully gentle soul breaking at the mere sound of my voice.

Let me hold you.

Let our bodies rest intertwined,
waiting for something we’ve longed for, for so long.

But why should we rush?

Give me another unexpected kiss.
Tell me this night is ours…
even if, by morning, you won’t be here anymore.

All I ask is that you look into my eyes,
holding on to a little of what the night gave us.

Oh, how I had missed your fingers playing with my hair,
slowly tracing their way down between my breasts.

Without asking for permission,
you reclaim a small piece of my soul,
while I steal a little bit of yours.

I won’t ask you to stay tonight.
I won’t break the pact my bruised heart made with time.

Go with the wind.
Return when the time is right.

I’ll be waiting for you,
with the same longing,
with the same trembling heart,
eager to lose myself in your embrace once again.

Less than a month ago, life drop a joke on me. I thought it wasnt a big deal. It has happened before, I healed, and like a joke, yet another guy proved to me, it will happen again.

There's only a certain amount of time you can take damage before you become irrepairable you know? There is also no pause button in life.

7.00 am on the dot, my alarm clock rang, on the next Monday. As if the night before I was not on the floor struggling to breathe between my sobs, shaking arms to support myself up. I remember thinking - no, I can't cry too much or my eyes will be swollen at work.

7.05 am, I stood in front of the mirror, yeah, a bit swollen. Cold shower it is. And another day starts, wake up, work, come back, unexpected tears once in a while.

I made a lot of mistake that first week. Every mistake brings tears to my eyes. Turns out, I'm also incompetent when I'm broken hearted. Not a surprise honestly. I wish they have a heartbreak leave 😂

Well, I can't make him stay. I also can't lose my job. So it starts. Numb myself with work - surprisingly productive. Work work work, cry, work work work.

I dont take alcohol, dont smoke, dont have friends in this city. My only distraction is work.

I feel tired from work, but to erase him from my mind, I work again. Work consumes me, deadlines chasing me, even in my dream. My sleep are getting shorter and shorter, sleep at 12, wake up at 4, work. Sometimes I sneak a cry session in there.

Feels pathetic for me to throw myself a pity party tonight, but I feel like I've been on automode for some time now. Its a bit exhausting, so lets feel a bit human tonight.

Next day is always coming, be it with or without me.

I'm a single guy living and working in KL. My current job is fine and pays the bills, but that's not the reason I'm writing this.

I'm looking for a side gig or part-time opportunity to earn some extra income. I have extensive experience managing paid advertising across multiple platforms, including Meta, TikTok, Google, and others.

Out of curiosity, I've been wondering if I should put my skills to good use by helping small brands grow through digital advertising. It seems like a great way to earn extra income while supporting businesses that may not have the expertise or resources to manage their ads effectively. Do you think is a good start to do the job?

I want to know what it feels like to be happy without waiting for disaster.

To lower my guard for once.
To stop scanning every room for the knife that hasn’t appeared yet.

To believe that not every quiet moment is the silence before another storm.

Maybe happiness isn’t what scares me.
Maybe it’s how quickly I’ve learned to expect its end.

I wish i could learn to stop thinking something is going to happen, that sooner or later someone will stab me in the back, without thinking about this uncertain future

Life has made me fall so many times that sometimes I feel like I’m no longer afraid of almost anything.

And at the same time, I’m completely terrified.
With my knees scraped raw, covered in Band-aids that don’t work, that peel off at the slightest touch of the wind.

A peace I keep screaming to the sky for.

If only someone could hear me.

I know you’re hoping for a little compassion from me. Maybe even a little love.
But how could I give you something I no longer have?

What’s left besides a broken heart, worn down by so many disappointments, by so many empty promises?

Your smile doesn’t go unnoticed.
Neither do your acts of kindness.
But when someone lives in distrust,
when someone no longer expects anything from anyone, don’t wait, hoping something will change.

And don’t expect me to give you the good parts of myself.
There’s nothing left but this emptiness, this uncertainty, this person living on autopilot.

You deserve a love that doesn’t leaves you in doubt , one that fills you with warmth and affection not someone with empty eyes, with hands that can no longer reach for you, with fleeting kisses and words that only know how to hurt.

I’m not going to promise you something
I can’t give.

So keep walking your own path, waiting for a love that’s more genuine, waiting for someone who can give you what I no longer can.

I always talk about wanting to travel to my friends. I saw this one girl posted that she’s going to Switzerland and Italy soon cause her mom’s company frequently does company trips. I’ve saved up almost 10k for the past year and i planned on using it for travelling. But due to unforeseen circumstances (im losing my job) i cant be irresponsible by spending it on a trip. I guess i am jealous of her but i am also happy for her. last year my cousin and aunt went on an eu trip too and i just live through the stories and pics they sent and told me about.

Ever had to take a shit, only to think you're done and when you get out of the toilet, get dressed and about to leave the house, your stomach just goes: "nah bro we ain't done. ROUND 2"

AND YOU'RE JUST RUSHING TO THE TOILET CURSING YOUR STOMACH LIKE: "WTFFF, COULDN'T YOU HAVE JUST LET IT ALL OUT THE FIRST TIME???" 💀💀

Anyways yeah just thought I'd drop this random thought I had in my head at 6:30 in the morning.....as I take a duse for the 2nd time 💀

Have a good one y'all 🤘

We parted for a year over an argument which is heavily my fault, then we started talking again. She messaged me with a pic of us saying she misses us and we kind of rekindled from there. I feel like we aren't as close as we used to be. I'm sure she has her own friends now.. She was my best friend in uni and I hate myself for doing her wrong :c

Like sure she's there, we message each other here and there and reply to stories but the connection is just not there. I really miss her and our connection. She deserves better friends and I hope her new friends are treating her well