r/SecretsOfMormonWives

Has anyone met them/seen them/knows someone who knows them? I‘m bored and I‘m really curious how it was and who was nice vs different from on TV

When S4 came out I spent wayyy too much time thinking about this show. Like a truly concerning amount of time. But eventually I dropped it because I realized that these are reality TV characters who I don't know so maybe I should touch grass, watch the World Cup, pay attention to the literal PhD I'm starting. But now the World Cup is over and I've made absolutely no research progress in months and somehow these people are so stupid and selfish and annoying that I just can't look away. So I'm back and I need to rant all my thoughts from the past few months. Thank you for indulging me.

1. The definition of cheating: Cheating is when someone in an exclusive relationship is emotionally or physically intimate with a third party without their partner's consent. Hooking up while in a non-exclusive relationship is not cheating. Hooking up while not together is not cheating. Swinging is not cheating. I have absolutely had it up to here with the "no one was innocent/what did you expect to happen" ridiculousness, it's just deflecting responsibility and blaming the victim. Taylor and Brayden (?) cheated, Miranda and Tate didn't. Get it through your fckn head Liann!!
2. Privacy: I think a lot of the issues with internet privacy nowadays come down to the fact that some people don't mind sharing all their details publicly; in fact they enjoy the attention. They don't understand that other people consider it horribly invasive to share their private intimate details, or even the mundane parts of their lives, with the world. Also, people who like attention are overrepresented online, especially on visual platforms like TikTok and Instagram, so their privacy norms become the default on the internet. This creates several problems:
   1. Kids on the internet: It's been said a million times but still: no one but Layla understands that their kids might turn out to want privacy someday. I know you all don't mind sharing your lives, you're influencers, but maybe your kids will grow up to be more private and will find it super weird that strangers saw their young lives. As someone who works in an AI-related space: please please please stop posting your kids.
   2. Swinging reveal: Can we all acknowledge how selfish and horrible it was for Taylor to throw everyone under the bus for perfectly consensual swinging, and how she obviously did it to distract from her own cheating? Miranda et al are completely right to want that to be private, because why the fuck is that the whole internet's business?? They did nothing wrong!!
   3. Photos: What fucking monster shares intimate photos of someone without their consent. IDGAF if they're on reality TV. IDGAF if they're influencers. What the fuck is wrong with you.
3. Miranda you're a fucking saint: I really hope you read this because holy shit girl, it boils my blood that you had to apologize to Taylor for denying swinging after she violated your privacy and trust so horribly, which got celebrated for being "so real and vulnerable". And then having to divorce your garbage ex-husband. Good on you for cashing out. I know you had to play the game but I hope you know you did nothing wrong. You deserve friends who treat you decently.

I don’t follow her on insta and I don’t have TikTok, but I was curious if a) her TikTok is also gone and b) why she deactivated?

Im curious to know what the general public opinion is on her before the new season comes out.

I wonder how this will change after the new season release.

View Poll

Is there any updates on Mikayla's marriage?! She's such a genuine person, I hope she's doing okay still! Her and Mayci are my type of friends. I wish I knew them in real life.

Mikayla is a mean girl. Period. The others have their moments and what not. But Mikayla mistakes being mean for being powerful. Mean girl energy

My apologies if this has already been brought up. I just rewatched Season 4, Episodes 5 and 6, specifically the conversation between Dakota and Taylor toward the end of Episode 5 and the beginning of Episode 6.

Even the first time I watched it, I felt like something was off. I didn’t really see Dakota trying to pick a fight or deliberately trigger Taylor, yet suddenly Taylor started crying, and Mikayla said she knew they were doomed the moment Dakota walked in. I found it odd but I didn’t think too much of it at the time.

However, after rewatching the scene, I’m seeing it in a completely different light.
Let me put this out there first - I don’t like Dakota, nor do I agree with many of his choices. But during that particular conversation, I saw someone who was at least trying to have a proper conversation with Taylor and figure out how they could move forward. Meanwhile, Taylor kept bringing up things Dakota had done in the past.
Yes, Dakota needed to change, and Taylor had every right to be hurt by what he had done. But in that specific conversation, I felt like Taylor became extremely emotional on her own. She started crying and saying that nobody listened to her, yet she barely gave Dakota the opportunity to explain what was on his mind. It suddenly became about her not being heard, while she wasn’t really listening to him either.

Edit: there’re some people think that I implied that Dakota cheated on Taylor which is not what I’m trying to say at all.

I’ve had my own experience with a partner cheating on me, so I understand how intense those emotions can be even thought that’s not the case for Taylor as much as she thinks she is entitled to that emotion because Dakota never cheated on her. I’ve been angry, I’ve lashed out, and I’ve needed time to cool down. But eventually, if you decide to continue the relationship, there has to be a point where both people are able to communicate about what happens next. At the time this conversation was filmed, Dakota “cheating” with a family friend had presumably happened months earlier. If Taylor had decided to continue sleep with him, I don’t think every attempt to discuss moving forward could keep turning into the same argument about the past. She’s 30+ years old, she should know better to get a hold of her emotions and discuss calmly instead of just crying out loud like a child.

As for Mikayla saying she knew they were “doomed” the moment Dakota walked in, that felt very biased to me. Mikayla had also watched Taylor repeatedly go back to Dakota. I even recall Taylor saying she didn’t want to tell Mayci certain things because she didn’t want to hear what was “right.” To me, that says something about how Taylor views her friendships. Sometimes it seems like she doesn’t actually want advice or a different perspective at all. All she wants is someone to validate what she already feels.

I like Mikayla, and I’ve actually supported a lot of what she’s been doing recently. But I don’t think it’s fair to automatically attribute Taylor’s emotional reaction in that scene to Dakota simply because Dakota has behaved badly in the past.
Dakota didn’t make Taylor cry in that conversation. Taylor became emotional because of what she was feeling and what their history represented to her. Those feelings are completely valid, but that’s different from saying Dakota caused that particular reaction through his behavior in that moment.
Taylor repeatedly said that she didn’t feel heard, but after rewatching the scene, my biggest takeaway was, was taylor willing to listen to anyone at all?

With Dakota being with Shinia now. I wouldn’t make that choice if I was one of them but it seems like they worked it out. I don’t know but to me it feels like a somewhat of a more mature relationship.

I don’t know.. what do you guys think?

I mean that’s essentially what Taylor did with Cru right? All those videos geared towards personal attacking Mikayla and there’s so many that I feel like there’s some litigation to it. It seems to be solely one-sided because while Mikayla responds to Taylor, Mikayla doesn’t have any direct contact with Kendra and has her blocked.