Struggling with the death of a patient
I've been an ER tech for many years, and am unfortunately "used" to death and euthanasia, however, this case is really eating at me tonight. I'm going to keep it short, mostly the basics. Approx 2yr old M DSH presented as a wounded stray, NWB RH, suspected animal bite wounds with a nasty abscess. Finder was treating at home for the past two weeks. Per finder doing well otherwise. E/D/U/D normally, no other concerns. He wasn't looking great per se, but stable. We went through multiple options/estimates/financing options and finder was only able to contribute less than the exam fee. Ultimately, we were able to work within their budget and give Convenia, SQ fluids and planned to send home with buprenorphine. I gave them a donated carrier to take him home in as they did not come in with one. After giving the injectables and returning the patient to the room, I left to grab discharges. I came back to the client taking the carrier apart and trying to get the patient out. The patient was struggling and trying to get away from the client. They attempted to wrap him in a blanket but he was desperately trying to escape. The patient got caught in the blanket and fell to the ground. I heard his head smack against the floor and he let out the saddest yowl. He screamed for a few seconds and then went agonal. By the time I was able to scoop him up and bring him to the treatment area, he was dead. There are more details contributing to how I am feeling but I'm not going to make assumptions or open up that discussion here. I'm just sad, honestly.