r/homemaking

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I’m disabled too (autism, schizophrenia, chronic inflammatory conditions) but my partner is severely disabled by ME/CFS and mostly bed bound and home bound. We get help with cleaning and transport (my disability impacts my ability to drive safely) but I do almost all the cooking, plan our meals, order the groceries, decorate our home, and help my partner with everyday tasks like showering, dressing, prompting to take medications, support at appointments etc. My goal is to be the best caregiver and homemaker I can to provide some quality of life to my partner.

For anyone else in a similar situation, what kind of skills and tasks have you found the most helpful? I’m thinking of doing courses in things like cooking, massage, eyebrow waxing or threading, nails, hair, sewing, personal training/lifestyle coaching, nutrition, psychology around pain management, relationships, conflict resolution, acceptance etc. I’m currently studying psychology. Im hopeful that some of these skills would enable me to improve my partners self image and quality of life as well as our relationship.

I am financially supported by family and receive government help so thankfully money is not an issue for us at this point in time.

I’m not someone who is capable of working most jobs without a lot of accommodations so I think that being a homemaker is probably going to be the most rewarding and accessible path for me to take and I want to be good at what I do and feel proud of myself and my work.

Help! I am a parent of an almost-5yo boy and I am therefore responsible for teaching him to manage a household so that he can be a self-reliant contributing member of society one day. He loves helping and he’s very responsible for his age, so I must be doing some things right. I thought it would be easy to teach these skills because I am a kindergarten teacher, so I am unusually good at explaining this to 5 year olds. Except … I suck at systems. It’s terrible. Maybe it’s ADHD, maybe it’s Maybelline, maybe it’s because I was taught how to do chores but never how to create useful systems. My current “system” is literal alarms on my phone labeled things like “notice kitchen” or “notice laundry pile” spread over weekdays to force me to notice things that need to be done. So, experts, please help me … What are the most basic habits/systems of homemaking that should be taught in early childhood?

Cooking, cleaning, all the sorts.

We're currently saving to move to a bigger house (in a very small 2 bedroom rn) but grocery shopping and getting things for the home feels so expensive. Any and all tips (even if its just telling me to stop buying something) are accepted​

Been dealing with persistent mold in my master bathroom for months now and i'm at my wit's end. The grout lines around the shower are the worst - no matter what i spray or scrub, it keeps coming back within a few weeks.

I've tried the typical drugstore stuff like Ti͏lex and some generic bleach cleaners, but they seem to just bleach the surface without actually getting rid of the root problem. The mold always comes back darker and more stubborn than before.

I'm wondering if there are enzyme-based cleaners or specialty products that actually break down mold at the source rather than just masking it? My contractor mentioned something about needing cleaners that prevent regrowth but didn't have specific recommendations.

What have you guys found that actually keeps mold away for months rather than weeks? Willing to invest in something qua͏lity if it means not scrubbing every other weekend.

I want to do a bake sale to give the proceeds to a homeless person who just had surgery. I want to make the most wanted items, so as not to have a lot of loss. What would you choose? Do you have any other ideas of items that you think would sell well? Thanks in advance for your help 🥳🤩

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Through a process of it being on too tight and moving when I sleep, I tore a hole in my fitted IKEA bedsheet that has now expanded to it almost being torn in half. Pillowcases and top sheet are in perfect condition as far as I know and I don't really want to buy an entire new set when I just need the one.

Couple questions:

1. Is there a way to recycle torn sheets? Throwing them in the trash just feels wrong and they're cotton, so I'm sure they can be reused somehow.

2. Does IKEA sell just the fitted sheet or offer some way to repair/replace? I did buy them almost 10 years ago so that's probably run out by now.

I want to call Dave, but I am not sure how to call the show. Please give me the advice you think he would give. I know he's not the be all end all, but I am floundering looking for a safe harbor and some help.

My husband wants to sell our home to get us out of debt and move to a lower cost of living area to be closer to family. We are in in Ohio. We live 30 min from a major city in a country feeling safe bedroom community. We bought in 2021 and locked in a 3% interest rate. We owe $270ish on it and it's worth roughly $385-400 in the market.

We have 15 year old twins and a 5 year old, 4 year old, and 22 month old. My husband is a bodyguard for a country music star and his salary is roughly $7100 per month whether he is away on tour or not. When he's home, he was working HVAC union with insurance for an additional $4k per month but they laid him off because of his inconsistent schedule. We are currently utilizing SAMSI benefits. I am a homemaker and hold the fort down when he's out of the country etc. Our mortgage is $2454 per month on an FHA with PMI.

Now that hes laid off he working for his mom and stepdad's construction company that is 90 minutes drive each way (in the hometown he wants to move to). It's good money but self employment so no insurance.

We have roughly 12k in cc debt, 8k in IRS tax debt from last year (he didn't do self employment taxes because we were so tight we used all the paychecks), our van is $700 per month with 16k left to pay on it, and his truck is $285 per month with 14k left on it. We have various medical bills from kids broken bones etc that havent been addressed.

I would like to stay here and do the Dave Ramsey program and actually be gazelle intense because I like our house and our neighborhood and change is scary for me. I honestly feel emotionally fragile right now and the thought of uprooting feels like a massive undertaking for my nervous system. It would mean leaving behind almost 2 decades of memories in this area. However, he does have a point that I have very little family support here and when he's out of the country if there's any emergencies I am on my own a lot.

His idea is: sell the house, take the equity and pay off all debt, buy a house in the hometown area that is closer to family and has a lower cost of living, so that he has more breathing room and isnt forced to work 3+ jobs to scrape by and still have nothing to show for it. We have $4 in our checking account, no savings at all now, and no cash. Waiting for tomorrow''s payday to pay all the bills. I'm sure you can imagine groceries for our family ranges from $1800-2200 per month if we are being careful (this includes toiletries and household items like diapers wipes etc)

My concern is selling the house and not changing the behaviors is not going to fix the problem. I told him this when he wanted to move 6 months ago, and he had a preapproval waiting. So he agreed to hold off but nothing really changed-he gpt laid off and tax time came etc. It's not like i am out spending foolishly. It's just daily life.

is he right? Would Dave say to sell this house? And how dire is the 8k in taxes that we owe? I look outside at my quiet yard with all the memories and the tought of leaving makes me so sad...not just the house but the surrounding area we have loved for two decades. He wants to move 100% however. He likes the hometown, the country area, the thought of being able to help his parents as they age and have help for the kids and stability.

Do I need a reality check? Or would Dave say we should stay put and work the plan here?

Realistically, we need about 8,500 per month for normal living (wile budgeting-pretty bare bones) so everything he makes is scraping us by and that's it. He is gone multiple weeks out of the year sometimes up to 6 weeks at a time so I am the main caretaker and do a lot on my own. I feel so stressed out and paralyzed about this decision. Every time he brings it up i get anxiety. But I imagine he has anxiety trying to provide in the current dynamic. What would Dave say??

TBH I thought the kids drawing on the walls would be the biggest problem. Turns out I was very, very wrong…

A few months ago I rented my house out to a family that honestly seemed great at first. Young couple, two little kids, super polite during the walkthrough, always paid rent on time, never caused any issues. They told me they had just moved to the state and wanted to stay in the area for about a year before deciding if they wanted to settle down there permanently

At the time, my biggest concern was something minor like the kids coloring on the walls or accidentally breaking something small. Annoying stuff, sure, but nothing serious.

I don’t live in that area anymore, so I wasn’t around much. Then one night, around 3 a.m., one of my old neighbors called me saying there were police cars outside my house. Apparently the couple had been having loud fights for a while, loud enough that the whole street could hear them, and this time someone finally called the cops because people were tired of getting woken up in the middle of the night.

From what I was told, during the fight the husband shoved his wife into the kitchen glass door and it completely shattered. The kitchen counters were damaged too, and somehow even the microwave got smashed. When I showed up the next morning, the place looked like a tornado had gone through it.

And honestly, the damage wasn’t even the worst part.

The smell inside the house was unbelievable...

There were dirty diapers everywhere and not just a couple, I mean piled up like they’d been sitting there for weeks. The entire place smelled so bad I almost threw up walking through the front door.

The security deposit won’t cover all the repairs needed. I’m still talking to the insurance company about this case and they don’t sound promising… But I’m for sure planning to go after that fam legally for the damage caused, but mentally I’m exhausted already

Every room in that house feels awful now. It doesn’t even feel like a home anymore. It feels like walking into a crime scene…

Lately I’ve been wondering if I should just sell the place as-is and move on with my life. I’ve looked into those companies that buy damaged houses, because I can’t picture myself fixing it up just to hand it over to another “nice family” again after this experience

Not sure if this is the right place to post but any recommendations for a lightweight 100% cotton comforter. Not more than $100. And none of that duvet cover/insert stuff, I don’t have patience for that.
I recently got a comforter from Costco we love the look of it but it’s waaaaaay too warm, ironically not as breathable as we thought. I wake up in the middle of the night every night sweating and uncomfortable and my husband and I basically are either lowering the temp of the AC or throwing off the blanket every night.

1 tbsp in the dispenser, vinegar rinse. Less than a tbsp doesn't clean completely (we scrape and rinse the dishes first) and if we use a tbsp all of the dishes have a film all over them. We have had to put them through a second cycle to get rid of it.

What am I doing wrong?

I used these ingredients:

1 cup washing soda (sodium carbonate)

1 cup borax

½ cup citric acid

½ cup coarse salt (kosher or sea salt)

Discussion came up recently about doing chores, specifically about if someone says they will be "doing the laundry", if it is reasonable to assume that folding the clothes after coming out of the dryer is part of that chore/task.

I would like to see what others think about this, so I'm posting up this poll. Please help participate, as this topic is going to come up again and I need to know whether I need to adjust the way I view what that terms means.

Note: every household is different, and so I know there will be exceptions. This is just to get a better general accepted meaning to the term as it applies to who folds clothes coming out of the dryer.

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Am I getting old or is this just a phase because the main thing I spend money on is fine china and vintage tea sets. I’ll end up chasing random vintage store on weekends hoping to find some unique unique sets. There’s just something so fulfilling about serving my PipiTea in beautiful niche cups when guests come over. The funniest part is people always say I don’t know why but your tea tastes better than when I make it. I swear part of it is psychological, like food somehow tastes better at a fancy restaurant even when it’s simple. Don’t get me wrong, the tea itself is my favorite but I also enjoy it way more when I drink it from those pretty vintage cups.
I’m only 32 and somehow turning into my mother driving across towns for china sets at antique stores.

I am 25F married 26M, he works a busy office job where he needs to wear ironed shirts and tidy suits to work, while I’m a stay at home wife. Growing up, my parents never really taught me anything to focus on my studies. At one point in my life I’ve lived in a studio apartment alone, but that home was (sucks to admit) very dirty and messy. But, still, I somewhat learned the basics of how to do “things” , I still haven’t learned how to keep a schedule and be on top of them. My husband has grown up in a really cultural family, where men didn’t do anything and didn’t have responsibilities at home. He didn’t do anything to this point, he tries but I kind of understand him not doing much cause he already works alot and comes home tired, so I think I should be doing the majority of the housework.

My problem is, I don’t know how to keep things going. Every two weeks I do shit ton of laundry, folding and ironing, and get the clothes done, then I get too comfortable and leave it for another week or two. I never regularly vaccuum the house. Only thing I can keep up is the kitchen because I really love cooking and cleaning the countertops. Other than that everything feels like a burden to me. I hate doing things. But I know this is not the way I wanna live anymore cause this is not sustainable and kind of damaging my relationship.

i’m trying to make my towel situation more sane. right now it is basically whatever towel is closest, which feels fine until things get humid and towels stay damp longer.

do you keep separate towels for hair/body/face or even gym, or is that overkill? if you do separate, what is your simplest system that does not turn into constant laundry?

would love practical setups: hooks vs bars, where you hang them, how many you own, how often you wash, etc.

I'm trying to fix the boring towel problem: towels feel clean, then the second they get damp again they smell off. I live in a humid place + small bathroom, so airflow is limited.

What actually worked for you: hooks vs bars, fan, leaving the bathroom, thinner towels, rotating 2 towels, sun-drying, dehumidifier, etc?

I'm not looking for products, just a system that keeps towels from staying damp.

Usually, I listen to a podcast while cooking or cleaning. But recently, I’ve been cooking without listening to anything. After a bit of cooking, I start reflecting on whatever comes to mind. It’s been faith here recently. No matter what I reflect on, I feel like I have a clear head afterwards. Does this happen to you? Is there anything you do to help you reflect?

Weekends are either quite time alone to recharge or casual time with people who matter to me. Nothing really planned, but that slow and normal pace feels important. I'd like to do housework like mopping, cleaning, and watering my plants. I actually enjoy taking care of my flowers and greenery. It feels like a small relaxing part of the day. I also used to spend quite a bit of time on yard work, especially trimming around terrace areas and flower bed edges, which often took more time than expected. Recently I've been using a robot mower for the lawn and it has helped a lot. Most of the mowing is handled automatically now, so I don't need to spend as much time on manual edge trimming like before. It gives me more free time on weekends to rest or to do other things. When everything feels balanced like this, I enjoy weekends a lot more.

Curious how do you usually split up your time for chores on the weekends?