r/houstoncirclejerk

▲ 9 r/houstoncirclejerk+1 crossposts

Strippers at Home for private events

Hey, it’s my friends birthday and we want to hire a stripper for the event. Any advice on how to go about doing this?

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u/Boring-Pop8932 — 10 hours ago

Outjerked by This Fuckin Weirdo at Freedom Over Texas

You wanna bring a kid out to sing a song, fine. But that song? Someone confiscate this dude's hard drive.

u/Rad_Centrist — 1 day ago
▲ 154 r/houstoncirclejerk+2 crossposts

Cafes to go to solo to, for someone away from social life but want to step into it after isolation? CPTSD man. Early 20’s. Can drive.

Hard to trust people but isolation sucks, and my social anxiety needs work. Places other than cafes welcome.

i’ve also not dated so inexperienced for 4 traumatic years

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u/Dogtorcod — 2 days ago

Looking for the best buttplug store that isnt overtly anally focused

I like butt stuff but dont make me think about my butt edit thanks for gold

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u/deepayes — 1 day ago
▲ 29 r/houstoncirclejerk+2 crossposts

Customer attempting fraud at CarVibe Houston dealership and I can't decide if its real or a skit

Apparently somebody came in trying to buy a car with fake docs / identity issues, the deal started throwing fraud alerts, and then this dude comes flying around the corner in a yellow vest blowing a whistle like the dealership ordered a federal task force off Temu.

People in the comments are calling him Officer Doofy and, unfortunately, that is pretty accurate.

I know this sub usually hates dealerships, and fair enough, but I looked them up after seeing the video and they don’t seem like one of those random sketchy lots. Reviews look pretty solid, inventory/pricing actually looks decent, and they seem to do inspections / short warranty coverage on a lot of their cars.

Still an absolutely unhinged way to handle fraud though. 😂

u/CarVibeHouston — 2 days ago
🔥 Hot ▲ 23.8k r/houstoncirclejerk+13 crossposts

GOP Rep. Troy Nehls, when asked about 60% of Americans struggling with affordability: "Affordability? What are you talking about?... I'm gonna get me a couple of big lobster tails. I'm gonna get me some nice rib eyes... Maybe the 60% of Americans don't work as hard as I do."

u/Ann_Dragonetti — 4 days ago
▲ 5 r/houstoncirclejerk+4 crossposts

Houston watch out

This man is HIV positive and did not tell me until after i confronted him be aware and be safe !!!!!!!!!!! Be careful

u/Rectangleskitz — 2 days ago