I believe (based on learning about my early childhood) that I wasn't really held adequately as a child. I think this explains a lot of my incredible need to be held as an adult (that generally does not get met).
I am wondering if this is something that can be healed through IPF or needs more than just a visualization and requires "the real thing." Despite having done IPF for ~2 years and now tested secure, this still feels like a hole in my heart.
I've recently came upon IPF with the videos of the Two Mind Method. I started with his way of doing it, which is basically "do it yourself" with guided stuff he suggests.
I feel like it does work with me, but I also tend to be quite good at visualizing things, understanding my own biases and evoking emotions. I am anxiously attached.
I am thus wondering when is a facilitator essential? Because if the theory is based on the 5 pillars, why not just doing pre-recorded visualization meditation on each pillars? I feel the problem would be if someone struggles with visualizing and feeling something realistic enough for it to work. I also can imagine someone more severe (like severe CPTSD and disorganized), the visualization could bring very difficult emotions of grief, or even panic attacks.
And in what case is it essential?
Hi everyone, from August 28th-30th I'll be offering an online weekend retreat focusing entirely on the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol.
Over three days we'll work on establishing the basis of the IPF protocol then spend time on each of the five conditions that make up secure attachment: safety, attunement, emotional regulation, delight, and support for growth. There will be nine hours of live teaching, guided practices, discussion, and questions, with time between sessions to practice on your own.
Everyone will have a 15-minute individual check in with me and I'll provide guided meditations to support independent practice. If you can't make a part or want to watch again, recordings of everything will be available for a year afterward.
People at all stages of practice are welcome. You don't need any prior experience with IPF, meditation, or attachment theory. If you have an established IPF practice, this retreat is an opportunity to spend dedicated time going deeper.
More information and registration here: https://www.evanleed.com/ipf-weekend-retreat
If you'd like a discount please send me a DM. No one will be turned away for lack of funds.
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Evan Leed was inspired to help others after making his own journey from disorganized to secure attachment. He was authorized to teach on meditation and attachment by George Haas, founder of Mettagroup, with whom he has maintained an active mentoring relationship for eight years. He trained in the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol and Three Pillars model of attachment repair for two years under the methodology's co-creator, the late Dr. Daniel P. Brown. His work centers around helping his clients come into greater security, resolve attachment wounds and traumas, and experience a deeper sense of meaning in individual pursuits and relationships. He has maintained a daily meditation practice for over eighteen years and has spent over nine months on intensive retreat, in various Theravada and Vajrayana traditions.
This course is offered in a meditation-based modality. It is not intended to be psychotherapy or a replacement for psychotherapy.
Essentially the title. I just want to hear from those people who made progress without a facilitator and want to get a feeling for what to expect.
I tried IPF for about a month later last year and stopped for a few reasons - was just finding it hard to imagine what I needed to and life took over.
But I am experiencing a great deal of loneliness and want to know if IPF helps with that. I.e. does a secure person handle loneliness better?
Hear me out. I am 52. In recent years I have done so much work on myself and I have had improvements at times. But the last week or two I just feel so tired of all the triggers and I just feel so discouraged and probably depressed tbh. I have been reflecting on my very early life. When I was born I was posterior and took 3 days to come out (possible brain damage?). I was a very fractious baby that cried a lot. My mother smoked during my pregnancy, I guess I had to withdraw from tobacco as a newborn? I’ve also heard this can lead to depression. When I was a toddler I used to have giant tantrums and bash my head against the wall repeatedly (I don’t remember this). My parents used to lock me in a room during my tantrums because they would get so frustrated with me. From there I think I was a pretty normal kid until at age 12 I decided I must be defective due to all the bullying I had. I have done so many things to try to help myself. Last week or two I have felt as defeated and terrified as ever.