What is self-esteem? 

Most of us think we know what it means- It's simply how we "feel" about ourselves or how we evaluate our own social standing. Genereally, people think of it as something you have on certain days and sometimes you don’t. It rises when things go well and falls when they don’t. I used to view it that way too.

After listening to Nathaniel Branden's 'The six pillars of self esteem' on the book podcast app Dialogue: Podcast discussions on Books, I realized self esteem isn't a feeling at all but a learned concept made up of a simple set of fundamental components or behaviors. It is a set of daily practices I had never been taught or examined for myself.

• The most important idea in the book is this: self-esteem is not a feeling but a result of behavior. The author emphasizes and makes it clear from the beginning. You do not think and feel your way into self-esteem. Instead, you act your way into it through consistent choices over time. This is a radical change in understanding self-esteem. It is not some state that happens to you depending on the circumstances.. Self esteem is something you actively enact or actively neglect. It is something you actively practice or choose not to. This shifts self-esteem from being a mood to being a skill, which is much more practical interpretation.
• "Living consciously" is the first of the pillars, and it supports all the others. The book does not refer to mindfulness in the superficial, modern sense. Rather, it emphasizes the importance of facing reality, acknowledging things you know but may not want to confront, and being fully present in situations that deserve your attention. the author calls this the foundational practice. If you are not honest to yourself about your perceptions, truth, and the feelings that result from them, you can build nothing of substance. Every other element of self-esteem relies on this.
• Self-acceptance is not identical to  "self-approval," and this distinction is quite important. Accepting yourself does not mean you ‘like’ everything you do or think or that you overlook or ignore your flaws. It means you stop fighting against yourself over them. When you reject parts of yourself, be they your feelings of guilt, your failures, or your unwanted impulses, you don't make them disappear or get rid of them. Instead, you cut off your access to them, making it harder to address them. Self-acceptance leads to honest self-reflection without generating any sense of shame.
• "Self-responsibility" is a pillar that many conversations around self-esteem overlook. The author makes the argument that when you give responsibility for your life to outside factors, such as circumstances, upbringing, or other people's actions and their results, you give up control over your self-esteem. You become reliant on external things to feel like how you think you are supposed to feel. Practicing self-responsibility simply means reclaiming ownership over your own life. This is not taking on excessive blame but rather recognizing that you are the only one who can change your situation and make it favorable.
• Personal integrity is the final pillar that the book enlists. The book defines it as 'the willingness to enact your values in your actions. Each time that the gap between what you say and what you do increases- that’s each time you make a promise (to yourself or others) and fail to keep it, you are sending a message to yourself that you can’t be trusted. This essentially transaltes to that- "if you don’t have anyone else there to damage your sense of self-esteem, you seem quite capable of doing the job yourself." Closing that gap, even in small ways, is one of the most effective paths to feeling better about yourself.

All six pillars work together in support of one central idea on which this entire book rests: self-esteem is earned, not given. It is earned through your choices in everyday life, not through extraordinary experiences or external achievements. Most advice about confidence focuses on and tells you what exactly you should be projecting to your external environment. But this book, on the other hand, shows what you should be doing to cultivate the only lasting internal validation there is- your own.

I’ve been reflecting on my reading list from the past year, and I wanted to share 12 non-fiction titles that really stood out for me:

• The Selfish Gene ★★★★★ A total game-changer that completely shifts how you look at evolution.

• The Eerie Silence ★★★★★ A thought-provoking look at the search for extraterrestrial life and why we haven't heard from anyone yet.

• Life at the Bottom ★★★★★ A sharp, unflinching examination of the forces that shape the underclass.

• The Triumph of Seeds ★★★★★ A brilliant deep dive into how humble seeds quietly conquered the planet.

• Through the Language Glass ★★★★★ Fascinating insights into how the language we speak actually changes the way we see reality.

• Non-Places ★★★★★ A deep sociological look at those anonymous, transient spaces like airports and malls that define our modern world.

• Just Six Numbers ★★★★★ A mind-bending exploration of the precise constants that keep our universe hanging together.

• The Case Against Reality ★★★★★ A bold argument that what we see isn't the world as it is, but a "desktop interface" created by evolution.

• Your Inner Fish ★★★★☆ A cool journey through our anatomy that links our bodies directly to our ancient ancestors.

• The Doors of Perception ★★★★☆ A classic, mind-expanding essay on consciousness and the limits of human experience.

• Our Culture, What's Left of It ★★★★☆ A provocative collection of essays that really challenges the current state of modern society.

• The Naked Ape ★★★★☆ A classic study that reminds us that, despite our tech and manners, we are still just biological animals.

Had this on my bookshelf for a while and it took my fancy yesterday. A good story about how a nationalist in Belfast ended up working for the British police as an undercover informant while he moved up the ranks of the IRA.

By his reckoning he saved the lives of 50 men (hence the name) who were either working for the police or army.

It is an amazing achievement and the steps he took at the end to save himself. I don’t know if I could have done it. That I found fascinating.

The one thing though is that he didn’t convince me on was his reasoning behind his betrayal. One minute he was fighting side by side with his nationalist buddies ‘battling the Brit’s’ and the next thing he was informing / spying without really providing a convincing narrative as to why he changed sides.

I haven’t seen the movie, might watch it tonight but the author is highly critical of it and said ‘it’s as close to the truth as Earth is to Pluto’.

I enjoyed the book but I don’t buy his moral compass. IMO he did it for the money though he was only a kid when he started informing.

Hue 1968: A Turning Point of the American War in Vietnam

Author: Mark Bowden  Pages: 608 Published: 2017

Synopsis: The first battle book from Mark Bowden since his #1 New York Times bestseller Black Hawk Down, Hue 1968 is the story of the centerpiece of the Tet Offensive and a turning point in the American War in Vietnam. In the early hours of January 31, 1968, the North Vietnamese launched over one hundred attacks across South Vietnam in what would become known as the Tet Offensive. The lynchpin of Tet was the capture of Hue, Vietnam’s intellectual and cultural capital, by 10,000 National Liberation Front troops who descended from hidden camps and surged across the city of 140,000. Within hours the entire city was in their hands save for two small military outposts. American commanders refused to believe the size and scope of the Front’s presence, ordering small companies of marines against thousands of entrenched enemy troops. After several futile and deadly days, Lieutenant Colonel Ernie Cheatham would finally come up with a strategy to retake the city, block by block and building by building, in some of the most intense urban combat since World War II.

Recommend: Hue 1968

Only Plane in the Sky: An Oral History of 9/11

Author: Garett Graff Pages: 528 Published: 2020

Synopsis: Now, in The Only Plane in the Sky, Garrett Graff tells the story of the day as it was lived—in the words of those who lived it. Drawing on never-before-published transcripts, declassified documents, original interviews, and oral histories from nearly five hundred government officials, first responders, witnesses, survivors, friends, and family members, he paints the most vivid and human portrait of the September 11 attacks yet. Beginning in the predawn hours of airports in the Northeast, we meet the ticket agents who unknowingly usher terrorists onto their flights, and the flight attendants inside the hijacked planes. In New York, first responders confront a scene of unimaginable horror at the Twin Towers. From a secret bunker under the White House, officials watch for incoming planes on radar. Aboard unarmed fighter jets in the air, pilots make a pact to fly into a hijacked airliner if necessary to bring it down. In the skies above Pennsylvania, civilians aboard United 93 make the ultimate sacrifice in their place. Then, as the day moves forward and flights are grounded nationwide, Air Force One circles the country alone, its passengers isolated and afraid.

Recommend: Only Plane in the Sky

The Quiet Americans: Four CIA Spies at the Dawn of the Cold War

Author: Scott Anderson Pages: 608 Published: 2021

Synopsis: At the end of World War II, the United States was considered the victor over tyranny and a champion of freedom. But it was clear—to some—that the Soviet Union was already seeking to expand and foment revolution around the world, and the American government’s strategy in response relied on the secret efforts of a newly formed CIA. Chronicling the fascinating lives of four agents, Scott Anderson follows the exploits of four spies: Michael Burke, who organized parachute commandos from an Italian villa; Frank Wisner, an ingenious spymaster who directed actions around the world; Peter Sichel, a German Jew who outwitted the ruthless KGB in Berlin; and Edward Lansdale, a mastermind of psychological warfare in the Far East. But despite their lofty ambitions, time and again their efforts went awry, thwarted by a combination of ham-fisted politicking and ideological rigidity at the highest levels of the government.

Recommend: The Quiet Americans

My America: Langston Hughes on Democracy

Author: Randal Maurice Jelks  • Category: Voices / Lived Experiences • Pages: 292 • Published: 2026

Synopsis: Randal M. Jelks delivers a revelatory portrait of Langston Hughes — poet, essayist, playwright, and American artist — tracing his journey from a child captivated by Kansas City to cosmopolitan witness in Paris, New York, Mexico City, and Madrid. Hughes is one of the few American writers who consistently wrote about democracy from a joyous perspective, and My America explores how his works speak to the political anxieties and crises we face today — examining themes of creative expression, communal dignity, class struggle, and human suffering. Each of Hughes's extraordinary essays, poems, and speeches is accompanied by Jelks's contemporary analysis, presenting Hughes not as a sanitized icon but as a radical thinker who demanded a democracy that guaranteed freedom for all.

Recommend: My America

The War of Nerves: Inside the Cold War Mind

Author: Martin Sixsmith Pages: 592 Published: 2022

Synopsis: More than any other conflict, the Cold War was fought on the battlefield of the human mind. And, nearly thirty years since the collapse of the Soviet Union, its legacy still endures—not only in our politics, but in our own thoughts and fears.

Drawing on a vast array of untapped archives and unseen sources, Martin Sixsmith vividly recreates the tensions and paranoia of the Cold War, framing it for the first time from a psychological perspective. Revisiting towering, unique personalities like Khrushchev, Kennedy, and Nixon, as well as the lives of the unknown millions who were caught up in the conflict, this is a gripping narrative of the paranoia of the Cold War—and in today's uncertain times, this story is more resonant than ever.

Recommend: War on Nerves

Prequel: An American Fight Against Fascism

Author: Rachel Maddow Pages: 416 Published: 2023

Synopsis: Inspired by her research for the hit podcast Ultra, Rachel Maddow charts the rise of a wild American strain of authoritarianism that has been alive on the far-right edge of our politics for the better part of a century. Before and even after our troops had begun fighting abroad in World War II, a clandestine network flooded the country with disinformation aimed at sapping the strength of the U.S. war effort and persuading Americans that our natural alliance was with the Axis, not against it. It was a sophisticated and shockingly well-funded campaign to undermine democratic institutions, promote antisemitism, and destroy citizens’ confidence in their elected leaders, with the ultimate goal of overthrowing the U.S. government and installing authoritarian rule.

Recommend: Prequel

Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents

Author: Isabel Wilkerson Pages: 544 Published: 2020

Synopsis: Beyond race, class, or other factors, there is a powerful caste system that influences people’s lives and behavior and the nation’s fate. Linking the caste systems of America, India, and Nazi Germany, Isabel Wilkerson explores eight pillars that underlie caste systems across civilizations, including divine will, bloodlines, stigma, and more. Using riveting stories about people—including Martin Luther King, Jr., baseball’s Satchel Paige, a single father and his toddler son, Wilkerson herself, and many others—she shows the ways that the insidious undertow of caste is experienced every day. Finally, she points forward to ways America can move beyond the artificial and destructive separations of human divisions, toward hope in our common humanity.

Recommend: Caste

Black Hawk Down: A Story of Modern War

Author: Mark Bowden  Pages: 400 Published: 2010

Synopsis: On October 3, 1993, about a hundred elite U.S. soldiers were dropped by helicopter into the teeming market in the heart of Mogadishu. Their mission was to abduct two top lieutenants of a Somali warlord and return to base. It was supposed to take an hour. Instead, they found themselves pinned down through a long and terrible night fighting against thousands of heavily-armed Somalis. The following morning, eighteen Americans were dead and more than seventy had been badly wounded.

Drawing on interviews from both sides, army records, audiotapes, and videos (some of the material is still classified), Mark Bowden's minute-by-minute narrative is one of the most exciting accounts of modern combat ever written--a riveting story that captures the heroism, courage, and brutality of battle.

Recommend: Black Hawk Down

Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass, an American Slave

Author Frederick Douglass • Category: Voices / Lived Experiences •  Pages: 224 Published: 2014

Synopsis: The preeminent American slave narrative, first published in 1845, Frederick Douglass's Narrative powerfully details the life of the abolitionist from his birth into slavery in 1818 to his escape to the North in 1838 — how he endured the daily physical and spiritual brutalities of his owners and drivers, how he learned to read and write, and how he grew into a man who could only live free or die.

In addition to Douglass's classic autobiography, this Penguin Classics edition includes his most famous speech, "What to the Slave Is the Fourth of July?" and his only known work of fiction, The Heroic Slave, written in part as a response to Harriet Beecher Stowe's Uncle Tom's Cabin.

Recommend: Narrative of the Life

Read the full list here

The hardest part about self-help books is actually remembering what you read.

Only a week later I can barely remember anything from it
I have bought books on communication, business, psychology, parenting, or self-improvement, but they just sit on shelf because they feel too long to get through.

I wanted to learn from these books, but I kept running into the same problems:
• They were so long and dense that reading started feeling like a chore.
• Even after finishing them, I forgot most of the ideas before I could actually use them.
So I and my Psychology professor build an experiment named BookBii
Instead of making you read long, information-heavy chapters, BookBii turns books into engaging stories with real-life applications, making them easier to understand, remember, and apply.

If that sounds interesting, the app is in my bio. It’s free for the first 1,000 users.

I’d genuinely love to hear what you think.

There were 107 auctions archived to the RBH data base for the week ending June 21.

Three auctions saw their totals reach a million dollars. Of particular interest to those who follow antiquarian books and related fields were: Sotheby's Books and Manuscripts sale on June 17th with receipts of $2.1 million; Christie’ Collections of the Chateau de Tourney Library on June 18th with total of  $1.3 million.

Not quite as rich, but also bringing good results was Lyon and Turnbull (Scotland) Books and Manuscripts on June 16 which saw sales reach . 217.75% of estimated value.

The Dominic Winter(UK) sale of Children's & Illustrated Books, Private Press, Modern First Editions, Playing Card on June 18 was also of interest. Some of the highlights of the week included French and Spanish literature, antique Bibles, and rare manuscripts and interesting ephemera.

For the week turnover was $18.46 million, a little less than last week. The average lot brought $1,421. There were 17,374 lots offered, of these 12,968 found new homes. For the week 74.64% of all lots offered were sold. 

The calendar for next week includes 118 sales.

Sale were denominated primarily in Dollars ($), Pounds (£), and Euros (€).

Here is the RBH FREE LINK - any viewer may use this link to see the complete report for the past week and list of upcoming auctions for next week: 
https://www.rarebookhub.com/auction_updates/1110

Not all the reported results or upcoming events are specifically book related.

Disclaimer: OP is not affiliated with any auction firm or dealer.