r/thisisus

I’m really excited for it! She talked about The Land on this week’s episode of That Was Us and it sounds like Mandy’s playing a very different character from Rebecca. I’m looking forward to seeing her branch out and the cast looks good too! William H. Macy who played Frank on Shameless plays her dad. Omar Epps who played Malik’s dad is in it! They just announced yesterday the first 2 episodes drop after The Superbowl! Very fitting!

I am almost done with my rewatch of the entire show!

And I remember really loving Kevin's whole "take off the hat thing" but honestly, watching it again, it was annoying. And I genuinely do not understand the support for it.

Kevin constantly butts into other people's conversations and disagreements, and it comes off as entitled. Especially considering the fact that he has a specific history of imposing on their relationship, including currently living in their home and somehow needing to be told not to play guitar at night.

And alright, I'm not a huge Toby fan in S6 and it's obvious they wanted us to accept Kate and Toby's split by making him worse. And his sugar comments were annoying. And I genuinely didn't agree with how he wanted to go about food. That's not my issue.

But making it about the hat was just just corny, in my opinion. And also didn't feel like Kevin's place to say. For two reasons:

1. Everyone outside the immediate family knows the significance of the hat to the Pearsons. And I say that this way because the significance doesn't extend beyond that (aside from Miguel) because, understandably, the spouses did not know and love Jack and cannot be expected to center around his memory and traditions. But they participate and that's cool. But it's significant. And telling Toby to take it off would be understood as "you're not welcome" because Toby knows the significance to them (even if he, realistically, wouldn't feel the same emotional significance). And that coming from someone not in the marriage just feels like overstepping, considering that Toby was not being ab*sive or anything that would require actual intervention. Kate should have the say as the grown woman in the marriage.

2. Again, Kevin specifically? I know, as viewers, we see Jack Pearson as the ultimate man of supreme significance but can you imagine being a non-Pearson, knowing Kevin, and hearing him be the one to say it? The immediate over-it feeling I think I would get even as Beth or something would be immediate. Because why does Kevin fix his mouth to insert his opinions during a disagreement between a married couple?

I've seen comments justify it with "Jack wouldn't want him wearing it" and yeah. Maybe. But, again, we're viewers who know Jack. In reality, there's no reason for anyone who didn't know Jack to care about what Jack would think outside of just respecting his memory if you're with one of the Pearsons.

I've also seen "Toby deserved it" and I genuinely want to stress the nuance of balancing the ideas that "someone deserved to be called out" and "not everyone is the best person to do it, nor is doing it in the moment always the best way to navigate situations". That is just reactive. Especially because we come from the perspective of knowing the private moments of Kaye/Toby's relationship. Kevin wouldn't actually know all that's been said.

I love This Is Us. Great show. And I love Jack.

But it reminds me of Friends where, rewatching it now that I'm older makes me realize that, while I will always love the show, these characters would be insufferable to know in real life. The Pearsons are insanely out of touch and treat their inner circle as deeper than others could understand (a completely unhealthy attachment that would understandably sabotage new relationships because other people actually also have significant lives and cannot be expected to just put all things Pearson on a pedestal).

I don't know. It's just my quick rant. Kevin opened his mouth way too many times across 6 seasons and, even as pre-asshole Toby, I would have had no patience at that point with him.

EDIT: Honestly, my frustration came less from Kate/Toby and more just with Kevin interjecting with that comment. Obviously health and diet are discussions both parents should be involved in (though I think Toby wasnt great at voicing them without just seeming snarky that day). But even if Toby was uncalled for with his attitude or how he framed his comments, I dont think Kevin had the right to tell him to take off the hat.

Bec & Jack, Kate & Toby, Kevin all by himself, there was so much to learn from these characters.
I won’t be forgetting this show any time soon.