u/-I-wanna-get-better-

So Im a lover girl through and through. I love love. I love being in love, falling in love, expressing my love and having it reciprocated. I love it!

But heart break happens for what ever reason and Im finally at the point in my healing where I recognize that someone not having the capacity for my love and what it requires doesnt mean im asking for too much (dont ask what Im asking for) or even that they didnt want me or didnt love me. It literally just means that they didnt have the capacity to give what I was asking for, and thats ok.

I sit with my feelings, let them wash through me. I identify the feelings under the initial feelings. I process and forgive and try to move on.

But like.. wtf do I do with this? With the information that if they could, they would. But they genuinely couldn't.

Where do I put that while I heal from the heartbreak? Because every time I think about that, it fucking feels like daggers in my belly all over again.

Hey yall

Im turning 35 next month and in two days, Ill be 35 days out from that SO I thought I could make a list of 35 things to do during that time. This is what I got so far if you guys could help a girl out?

1. Read at least 35 min every day

2. Learn a new skill (spend 35 min on daily)

3. Build a new habit (work out 35min a day)

4. Try a new dish

5. Go somewhere new

6. Go somewhere totally alone (movies, diner, etc.)

7. Do 35 selfless things

8. Do 35 selfish things

9. Walk 35 miles (over the entire time)

10. Write 35 handwritten notes for yourself

11. Spend only 35 min on social media a day

12. Do 35 min of study daily

13. Have 35 brand new social interactions

14. Give daughter 35 min of focused attention daily

It doesn't HAVE to be 35 related lol, thats just more to give a "theme".

Hi,

Im sorry youre going through so much right now. Or maybe not any more.. its been a while since we last spoke.

I just wanted to say.. its ok to let things go. You hold and you hold and I understand why. So many things were taken from you, your voice, your childhood, how you love.... and you felt so small because of it. And you were. For so much of it you were.... so small. And you didnt deserve it. You did nothing wrong.

And look at you now. A man that would have done something to stop it from happening.

But you can let go now. Start with something simple. Like with your work. The art you created that may bring joy to so many others, but has only served to tire you out lately.

When you made it... it was a love letter to people like me. To people like you. And the way that you crafted it, it can be read again and again without you having to be there so please, let this go. And maybe itll help you let other things go too.

I want you to get better. I want you to feel better. Even if I never get to see the changes in your life, I want those changes to lead to a better life for you and the people that you love.

Just... please. You have to start by letting go.