u/ABardNamedRowen

I finally shaved my head. After a year of wanting my hair gone I shaved it off! It was down to the small of my back. And now it's gone. The euphoria is amazing. I looked in the mirror and the light in my eyes returned. I haven't been able to stop smiling.

I remember seeing a butch teenager with a buzz cut and I just remember thinking I wish I had the guts to do it too. At the time I didn't realize I was butch or a lesbian.

I'm just so happy it's gone!

I'm trans masc nonbinary. While I identify with womanhood partially there is something else there with my gender. And I'm like 98% sure I'm not a man. My pronouns are she/he/they.

I wanted to start hrt while on Medicaid. But I can't now because of bigots in the state government. My wife was about to start her transition too. And now we can't. Don't tell us to move we can't even live on our own because we are disabled.

It's just I have bottom dysphoria and I wanted bottom growth so I could maybe feel better about my genitals. And now that's been stolen from me.

I didn't tell my wife how upset I was because she was so upset. Her appointment was next month. So I comforted her and worried how it would affect her. I didn't realize until today just how upset I am for myself as well. I was on the fence about hrt and having the option taken from me has made me feel angry. It's made me realize that yes hrt was what I wanted.

I'm fucking 32 years old and the government thinks it knows what is best for me and my body. I don't know if I can be fully happy just as a butch woman. I wanted to get my desired effects from hrt then get the hair removed that I grew. I'm already hairy because of PCOS. I wanted a deeper voice so bad. I wanted better for myself. And it's been stolen from me.

A little bit ago a woman took my picture and made fun of my leg hair and said I was like a man. Just a few minutes ago a woman made a disgusted face while looking at my legs. I have yet to have men say shit or give me dirty looks because of it. But I think it's because men are seeing a lesbian when they look at me and women are seeing a woman that is a deviation to societal beauty standards.

I mean since becoming visibly queer men are acting aggressive with me but women are being mean girls. It sucked because I love women so so much. I don't care what a man thinks but what women think matters to me. It feels like these women are trying to keep me in line by shunning me.

https://preview.redd.it/hkjphl0y4z0h1.jpg?width=918&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4c03b2451f47f06f8af6b2009185c7aedb27b5dc

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https://preview.redd.it/jdovbl0y4z0h1.jpg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=438d6d1901af56e15171d40d9082b8b8e59fa597

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https://preview.redd.it/1bqjhm0y4z0h1.jpg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5219973530793a389516a2fe49703d1002a0ccdc

Making a save with my wife and I's sim selves. She dresses like this in real life.

They passed a bill. Her appointment to start hrt was supposed to be next month. State funds now can't pay for hrt or surgical procedures. What to do?

I used to be super feminine. Dresses, cute cardigans, leggings, blouses, make up, ect. I was more quiet and not as straightforward, less confident. But now I'm very obviously queer and men have just been so aggressive with me. Even got my life threatened once for not being palatable and doing "women's work" like I was told to. I would have done the chore if it wasn't presented in a gendered way.

I just wasn't expecting how intense men are if you aren't humoring them. And I know this has to do with me being butch because this started happening within the last year I've been presenting this way.

I'm not going back into the closet. and I feel so free being who I've always been inside. But anytime I mention cutting my hair off in front of these men they get uncomfortable. I feel like they are trying to push me back in line. I hate it.